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Exclusive: Teen Sex in Schools, Part Three

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Momvestigation: Hear from the teens who've had sex on school grounds, in their own words.

"There was this guy I was into, and we would have sex in his car at school. One time, he had football tryouts and I had track, and we hooked up right there on the field after everyone had left." -- Quinta, 15, San Mateo, Calif.

During our in-depth Momvestigation, we were shocked to learn that one in five kids has witnessed sex in school. While our survey found that only 4.5 percent engaged in any type of sexual activity on school grounds, the majority of kids are still affected by the actions of that small minority. They know about it, they talk about it and 20 percent witness sex at school with their very own eyes. But we were even more shocked when we began interviewing teens and tweens who fessed up to hooking up on school grounds. 

Before we met them face-to-face, it was easy to make assumptions: They were the troubled teens, the rebels, kids from the wrong side of the tracks. Then we met them -- and those stereotypes went out the window. These were average, all-American kids. They could have easily been our own daughters or sons. But instead of talking about baseball scrimmages or "High School Musical," these teens described having sex in the classroom, in the auditorium, in the school parking lot. Today, you'll hear these raw, true-life confessions, along with expert advice on how to talk to your own kids about making smart choices. Listen to these kids who've had sex at school, then talk to your kids to make sure they don't.


We know that having "the talk" with your teen is never easy. Before now, many of us wouldn't even think of talking to kids about having sex in school. Download this printable discussion guide to get the ball rolling.

This exclusive "Sex in Schools" Momvestigation has been an eyeopening wake-up call for moms across America. Will you heed it?

How our study was conducted:

Teen Sexual Encounter Study
This study was conducted for via telephone by ICR, an independent research company. Interviews were conducted from November 8-13, 2007, among a nationally representative sample of 509 teen respondents aged 12 to 17. More information about ICR can be obtained by visiting

Each TeenEXCEL is weighted to provide nationally representative and projectable estimates of the population aged 12 to 17 years old. The first step is to assign a pre-weight to each respondent, which is determined by dividing the number of incoming telephone numbers in the household into the number of teens in the household. For most respondents, this weight will remain at 1.0. The second step is a simple ratio estimate: The 500 interviews are sorted into 16 cells and projected to the census population of the cell. These sixteen cells are from the four census regions, by the two sexes, by the two age groups (i.e., 12 to 14 and 15 to 17).

TeenEXCEL consists of 500 interviews each month among a nationally representative sample of teenagers, aged 12 to 17. The sample is divided evenly among males and females aged 12 to 14 and 15 to 17. A sample balancing program is utilized to ensure that, when tabulated, the sample is reflective of the national teenage population.

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15 comments so far | Post a comment now
Debra Rukes January 11, 2008, 12:45 PM

As director of a teen pregnancy prevention program, I am not shocked at the results of the survey. Think about it; Kids were doing crazy stuff in the locker rooms, bathrooms, parking lots and student smoking lounges at my school in 70’s. The reality is people of all ages sometimes make poor decisions, so eliminate the blame, stereotypes and assumptions. Instead, spend time listening to young people including your sons and daughters to hear what they and their peers are doing, thinking and feeling. It is amazing how listening to one another can change behaviors, improve relationships and ease concerns.

dewey cox March 6, 2008, 8:55 AM

my kid that is 10 and she sais she has seen old people having sex with cats and dogs

Caitlin April 7, 2008, 7:43 PM

I’m 14 years old and in middle school I saw kids as young as 10 years old having sex during school. We are the kids that grew up with the absolutly child friendly T.V. shows but the next generation is growing up with shows like Hannah Montana and Thats So Raven. The morals in those shows are so much lower that what my generation grew up even with being exposed to high morals so I can only wonder what this next geberation is going to be like.

Who Knows April 10, 2008, 7:36 PM

Wow how is it that a 14 yo is talking about how a 10 yo & her generation is different thats barely half a decade theres not much difference try at least a 7 year time span 2 declare it as being another generation, but on the subject its only gonna get worse the only thing that parents can hope for is that they stay protected … & or establish the right values and self respect in the household kids are n will always be impressionable if your child is engaging in such acts its your fault not the media you control what your child watches, when they watch and for how long

kathy April 10, 2008, 10:54 PM

could they be on tv if they didn’t have a STORY? NICE SLANDER

eric Stone April 10, 2008, 11:35 PM

drug use(from teens), underage sex…and crime(from teens), all of which are statistically down since the 90’s, 80’s,70’s, 60’s and 50’s and 40’s…so realize that

ken April 12, 2008, 12:24 PM

eric stone where are you getting your infomation from kids are having sex as young as 10 yrs old out in the open i have a 12 yr old nieghbor whose mother does not care what she wears who she hangs out with her 18 yr old brother is trying to keep her straight but she is having sex with guys 10 to 20 yrs older than her and she thinks it is funny she actually laughs about it it is sickning

Anonymous April 12, 2008, 4:24 PM

I’m a teenager myself, and yes, my parents have talked to me about sex. Has it really made a big difference? Not really. I appreciate them sharing their experiences and trying to help me avoid them, but I’m really not going to learn if I don’t make the mistakes myself.

I think as much as parents would like to think them getting involved and talking to theirs teens about it all the time, it doesn’t always change the opinion of the child. In the end, it’s really up to the teen and their decision.

The one thing I like, though, is that I CAN talk to my parents when I want, and they’re understanding. I would feel uncomfortable if they were to just bring it up. When I was ready to talk about it, I could and did, and I really like that.

Anonymous June 3, 2008, 8:51 PM

wow. so, if we’re not sexually active, then we should go and sit around and talk about baseball and highschool musical? jeesh. maybe these people are having sex coz they’re bored or something…. or they just don’t have morals. and honestly, who thinks that paris hilton is a good role model or one at all? that’s right. NO ONE. what’s wrong with our schools today?
i mean, i guess you have to be a real ahem, “loose” girl to be that way, don’t they see that all they’re going to end up with is a baby or an STD or in the long run, some guilt? there’s so many things, risks. “me and my boyfriend did it in the car alot of times, SEVERAL times….” says the blond headed girl…..
well, can i ask something? how long do you think that relationship lasted? i wonder if she’s gotten tested……

Father  June 7, 2008, 1:13 AM

Father of girls , my wife and I have talked to them sex . Got a couple Daddy please do not want to talk to you about this . Couple things that I see that are alarming to me as a Father are the way some of these girls dress .
Trust me my daughters are not allowed to dress that way, I have a dress code that is followed . Where are these girls Father’s and Mother’s at .
Talk to your children about sex and self respect .

dont worry  December 2, 2008, 12:24 AM

im 14 and ive had plenty of sexual experience for such a young age im very mature for my age. my parents know i have sex. they try talking to me about it and have been talking to me about it since i was young, were pretty comfortable speaking about sex, ive had sex with guys at parties and boyfriends and stuff, ive always been safe and used protection. ive even gotten tested i feel like teens can be responsible and do the right thing and enjoy having sex without getting lectured and being told that were to young to be doing something that everyones going to be doing sometime in there life. so have trust in your children just tell them your there and you can help if they need you.

Anonymous January 31, 2009, 1:27 AM

Teens will have sex. They will start too young. Fact of life. Doing it in schools where others can see is the bigger issue. For some wierd reason, I always thought sex was, I dunno… a private sort of thing???

Indignant May 10, 2009, 7:26 PM

I have a real problem with these types of studies. My number one rule when reading any study or poll is to try to ignore the numbers and instead just absorb the information. Numbers can be twisted, survey questions can be biased, and like Debra Rukes said, this stuff has been going on forever.

Dr. Varady advises parents to ‘let [teens] know your values,’ but then at the same time, make sure not to lecture them. If it’s supposed to be a dialogue, why not advise asking teens themselves what their values are?

She may be a licensed clinical psychologist, but that doesn’t mean she is up to snuff about what teens are really thinking and how to discuss these issues with them (us).

These sorts of dour surveys become self-fulfilling prophecies in my opinion; if all you hear about your generation is that sex is more casual, drug and alcohol abuse is more common, it doesn’t provide for a very optimistic outlook on life.

Me personally? I’m seventeen and I’ve have more than a couple sexual partners. I wasn’t necessarily in intimate, committed relationships each time. But guess what- I also graduated high school early with a 3.5 and moved out on my own, to another country when I was sixteen. Sex is different for everyone, and if people like Dr. Varady would stop making such grim prophecies about us ‘children’ and stop to listen and treat us like human beings, maybe we could all understand each other a little more.

Anonymous December 18, 2009, 9:34 PM

Just a few days ago two girls were caught by a teacher having sex in the bathroom. Some of my friends said that they had heard it happening on other accounts also.

extacys mom April 17, 2011, 10:08 PM

*sigh* i been having sex with my fiance since i was 14
i’ve done it at school but hey! i was pregnant and had to take advantage since i didnt see him outside of school hours

these people act so shocked, like if adults never do that -_- i dont think age has anything to do with it but maturity, i’d be married if it wasnt for my parents =/

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