Fighting in front of our kids is a big no-no. What do you do if you're already way past round one?

Sound familiar? You're in the middle of a heated discussion with your beloved, it starts to escalate to yelling, and you find yourself smack dab in a knock down, drag out fight. Then, out of nowhere you hear, "No Mommy yell!" You look down, and there’s your toddler, hands over his ears and fear in his eyes. It's complete role reversal—you’re the child being reprimanded by your much, much wiser toddler. There’s no worse feeling. To realize the entire conflict has been observed, processed and filed away in that absorbent little brain make us vow to never, ever raise our voice in front of them again—easier said than done. So we asked
Mom•Logic friend and family counselor Rosanne Tobey LPC how to put the kibosh on conflict when our kids are within earshot:

Change More Than The Subject: Whatever you're talking about, drop it and one or both of you should leave the scene so you don't re-engage.

Pick Up Where You Left Off: It's easier to let a conflict drop for the moment if you know that later, there will be a forum to discuss the issue. You both need to agree to talk about it later, then make sure you indeed talk about it.

Switch the Focus to Your Child: Apologize for fighting in front of her, and for frightening her. Comfort and reassure her.

Don't Beat Yourself Up: It's all right for children to see parents disagree or bicker occasionally. Allowing children to see low-level conflict followed by some resolution will help them learn that people can disagree and still love each other. With that in mind, be sure to save the big guns for when the children are not around.

For more from from Rosanne Tobey LPC click here.