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The Cheating Mom Diaries

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Diane, Mom of 3, tells all about her secret affair.


"I've been married for almost five years, and have three adorable children. I'm 27 years old. And I have a boyfriend on the side. We've been together for about a year. It's hard to live a double life this way, but my husband cheated on me before we got married many times with lots of women. Deep down, I knew, but I never had proof. About two years after we got married, he told me about his flings. I felt so betrayed, worthless and unattractive. That's what sent me straight into the arms of another man.

My boyfriend is four years younger than me. We were just friends at first, but then one thing led to another, and we fell for each other. Hard. He shows me more love then my husband ever has, and makes me feel really beautiful. Even though I'm overweight, he's still super attracted to me. My husband and I have sex only about twice a month, but my boyfriend and I have sex three times a week.

Why haven't I left my husband? I can't afford to. I'm a stay-at-home mom, and it's really hard to get a job with three young children. Plus, it would hurt my kids if we got divorced. So I just stick with the routine. Sometimes, I do feel bad about the affair, but not as much as I used to. I have my married mother life, and then I have my other secret life. And I do my best to make sure those two worlds will never collide."

To read more from Diane's diary, check back next week.

Are you a cheating mom? To tell us about it, click here.

next: Whose Body is This?
45 comments so far | Post a comment now
Jake  June 18, 2008, 11:55 PM

I cannot understand why people think it is better to be a cheater and a liar than divorced . Get out if you are not happy .

Gary July 2, 2008, 6:59 PM

Two wrongs don’t make a right. If he cheated on you before you were married why did you marry him? More importantly, why did you have children? I assume it was to entrap him unknowingly into taking care of you as it’s obvious from your comment that “it’s hard to get a job with three children I’m a stay at home mom” Don’t use the excuse that you do it for the children. Be honest with yourself and everybody else and admit that your just a lowlife P.O.S. that’s too lazy to support yourself!

2ND2NONE July 2, 2008, 7:55 PM

A marriage of convenience what exactly is that? So what yu are saying is that you are too lazy to get off your butt and get a job and support yourself and your children. Trust me when i say that your boyfriend does not love you and does not want to be with you if you leave your husband you would be SOL with this man, if he did care anything about you or himself then he would not settle for the sloppy seconds and would do what he has to do to make a home for you + 3 and when exactly did you figure out you did not want a husband after 1,2,or three kids.GIVE ME A BREAK

Truth July 21, 2008, 9:54 PM

Well I think what you are doing is cheating yourself out of something great.

The best thing you can do for yourself and for your children is to leave an unhappy marriage and move on. Can’t afford it is not an excuse. I have been in an unhappy marriage and I left! It was hard and I had nothing for so long because of it.

But what did my daughters learn about her mother. Never stay in an bad marriage especially with someone that treats you badly. They learned that her mother could do anything she wanted and they can to with hard work and true motivation. And untimately they learned what true love it like and they tell me all the time… how glad they are to know what a great man in my life and their life is like.

All because I didn’t settle for anything less than what I deserve!

“If you always do what you have always done… you will always have what you have now.”

Jen August 1, 2008, 5:11 PM

does the boyfriend know about your “real” life?

beautifulnomatterwhat August 3, 2008, 1:40 AM

Wow! there are no middle of the road comments? I too am in my late 20s, I too am a stay at home mom, and I too suspect my husband has cheated but have no proof, so I completely feel for you, but my opinion is that it is always better to take the high road, even if its not the easiest, have I thought about it,…sure have! every woman wants to feel wanted and desired, and when you don’t feel that at home, you tend to see it of my favorite sayings is, “the grass always looks greener, till you jump over the fence” and I believe this is true. so make a plan for yourself girlfriend, and get your self respect and dignity back. you let your husbands betrayal take your truth away, and now you may think you have it all in balance, but do you really? your kids are only going to get older, and keeping your secret life is gonna wear on you.

Anonymous August 10, 2008, 10:33 PM

You do realize your husband & children will find out, all of my friends who are in affairs, their husbands have found out & sent my friends lifes into hell.

Jamie August 12, 2008, 8:46 PM

I can identify with the cheating wives, I too have a guy on the side. My husband doesn’t beat me, never cheated, and is a wonderful father and husband. Somewhere, we lost our spark, he spends his nights in front of a computer game, while I do my chores and watch tv or read by myself. We go 6 or 7 months without sex and he never brings it up. I have talked to him, we have gone to counseling, but nothing worked. I love him, but needed something to make me feel good. Having a “friend” on the side is great. He is in a similar situation with his wife. We have no great love affair, it is just that hot steamy sex you get at the beginning of a relationship. We never speak when our spouses are around and he doesn’t knwo my husband nor I his wife. It fills the void that is missing in an otherwise good marriage. Feel free to judge me, I felt bad about it for a while, but now, I don’t. I can’t or I will have to leave my husband and crush my kids. So what would you have me do? No, don’t answer that.

all full of BS August 12, 2008, 11:25 PM

You and everyone that sides with you is a complete POS. I am a single male and teacher and I see the effects of this lifestyle everyday. Your husband was a worthless SOB to do what he did to you before you got married. You were wrong to marry him. What you are doing makes you an even bigger POS. I am a child of this behavior and teach numerous kids whose parents do the same thing. It scars many of the kids for life and effects their future relationships as well. Your children will never look at you the same when you are caught, and chances are you will get caught. Typical responses of people today. I am in my thirties and I look at friends of mine with little or no respect when they do this to their family. I have no faith or trust in them either. Then I look at the students I’ve taught, and those in there twenties and I see how and why our society keeps getting worse. Get a divorce and get a job. Chances are he’s going to have to pay child support etc…A job with this will eventually get you ahead. I am not going to say this will be easy. You won’t be able to keep up with the lifestyle you are probably accustomed to but you will have self respect, and you won’t lose your children’s respect. Hopefully they don’t find out or it will probably screw them up. Show some class get out now and try and save some dignity. I am not siding with the man, your both not good role models for your children apparently. For all of you who say you don’t know so don’t judge, get real, I experienced this and see the effects of this behavior on kids everyday.

Anonymous September 14, 2008, 4:44 PM

you are a worthless pig

barefootboy November 27, 2008, 1:33 PM

I believe she will eventually get caught and have to make a living. She says she can’t get a job. Probably some sad days ahead for her.

Kimber December 15, 2008, 10:13 PM

It is tough esp when children are involved. But what kind of man (your new boyfriend) is ok with you going home to your husband every night? I hope you dont think he loves you honey because thats not love, thats a booty call! If you are no longer in love with your husband and not willing to work things out you should seperate. As your children get older they do not need to be witness to a loveless marriage.

Lucius March 21, 2009, 9:46 AM

Hey porky, don’t worry about it. I am sure hubby is hoppin’ on some 110 pound hottie while your boyfriend explores the folds in your jelly rolls.

I can tell you this is true: If you are fat, hubby is going to cheat. No one like riding the belly wave to ejaculation.

hatehim lovehim April 6, 2009, 12:55 AM

Im also cheating on my husband we have been married for 28 years I cheated on him for the 1st time 2 years ago it was a x mas party for my work he didnt want to go so i left him and our 2 kids at the time at home and i left to go to the party i got to the x mas party and at my table there he was 10 yrs younger den me he asked me where my husband was i said i dun care he asked me to dance i said yes he kissed me we danced and then after the party eneded we took a cab to his place he invuted me in for coffee. ha ha coffee yeah rite we had sex for 4 hours str8 i never felt that befor now im still with him and were my husband and i had a nother baby i dont think its my husbands baby no one in the family knows about this affir my husbands b day is comin up soon sud i break it to him then i dont love him any more any advise

Anonymous January 10, 2010, 6:33 PM

As Sherri said you only live once. Oh yes definately, you only live once so why not cheat , smoke crack, murder and rape someone, after all you only live once, right Sherri ? If the husband admitted his sins to you and you married him afterwards, then you made that decision and in that decision then that means whatever was in the past was in the past. You’re using his past as an excuse for you to sleep around and that makes it worse on your part. And if you aren’t happy then you should divorce while the kids are still young, it will have less effect and easier to explain to them, if you divorced when they’re older then the explanation becomes more complex and eventually they will find the truth and making it hard to live their life correctly not to mention the bad example you will set. Also the Rotten upset of this story that you won’t leave him because he supports you finanially is absolutely absurd, the only thing I can say to explain this is wrong. You are in dire need of psychiatric help and relationship counseling , either that or a lawyer. Your lost and I hope you find the right path for the kids sake, good luck. September 3, 2010, 10:37 PM

I can’t believe all the judge mental know it all comments on here…No one knows another person’s situation enough to say “you shouldn’t be doing this” Life is short and sometimes your stuck in a situation that there really is no quick fix to. So why sit around and be sad and depressed? If you can find happiness with someone take it. The children will get hurt no matter what. Sad fact of life.Hopefully they will do better with their lives. I hated watching my parents fight for years on end until the bitter end when one finally died. I would be much happier knowing my mother had some form of happiness even if it was short lived.

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