As kids hit those not-so-sweet tween years, Moms search for answers to keep it together.

Somewhere between 8 and 13 years old, something takes over our children and they start acting like strangers who want nothing to do with us. Is there anything we can do about it, or is it just the way it is?

Mom•Logic friend and counselor, Rosanne Tobey offer some expert tips on how to maintain closeness:

• Try not to personalize it. Recognize that this time period is not so much about the two of you as it is about your children beginning to grow into their older, more individual selves. In order to accomplish this, they will be trying out new ideas that are different from your own.

• Listen up. When your child does have some different ideas, find out what they are

thinking. Before you draw your battle lines and dig in, talk to your child. Find out why they believe their way is best, and how they came to that conclusion. Your child feeling heard and respected will go a long way toward keeping you connected.

• Draw clear boundaries and stick to them. Respecting your child does not mean that you have to accept rudeness or bad behavior. Yes, those behaviors are to be expected, but that doesn't mean they need to be allowed. Explain to your child that while they can express themselves if they disagree, that kind of language or behavior is unacceptable, and there are consequences. When the same situation arises again (and it will), follow through!

Rosanne adds, "Know that you have not lost your special child. This--as everything else in their development--is a phase and is essential to their emotional development and well being. Don't blame them--they really can't help it. In the end, know that he or she is in there missing the closeness with you as well. It's your job to stick by them and know that the closeness is still there, it just looks a bit different these days."