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What Moms Want to Ask Spitzer

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Guest blogger Mom Leslie Adler: Can't you keep it in your pants, Eliot!!!?


Thanks to Eliot Spitzer, my 10-year-old has added "hooker" to her vernacular. And quite frankly, after hearing what "Kristen" got paid for the evening, she may have added it to her dream career list.

So, I thought I should take a few minutes to say, "Thank you, Eliot, for making your sex life part of the national dialogue."

As reparation for the damages he has caused, I think Mr. Spitzer should be forced to hold a press conference where he answers the real questions on the minds of most Americans. (OK, maybe only my mind, but still I want answers.)

Press conference questions for Eliot Spitzer:

• What does a woman do to you for $4,300 a "session"? Please provide this answer in list form, and speak slowly, 'cause we're dying to know.

• Were you secretly competing on the new reality show How Many Laws Can One Break Getting Laid? If you were, I gotta believe you are this weeks "Biggest Lawbreaker."

• Are there no hookers in Washington? You had to put one on a train from New York to Washington? What, are hookers like Chinese food (best in New York)?

• Ever hear of a plain old mistress? The kind where all you pay for is a studio apartment and a Brazilian wax once a month?

• Couldn't you just find an intern like Bill did?

• Aren't there any "governor groupies" who would be willing to spank you and tell you what a "bad little governor" you have been?

• And finally, on a scale of one to infinity, can you rate the level of your arrogance so that we can all better appreciate how you thought you could be "holier than thou" in your relentless pursuit of amoral, law breaking citizens, and then be one yourself?

Thanks for your time, Eliot!

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