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PiscesWhy Don't You Adopt From Here?
Mom•Logic's Jackie: Yes, I do know that plenty of American children need homes—thanks for asking.
I'm one of the many parents adopting overseas who've gotten that dreaded question, "Why would you adopt internationally when there are so many kids here in the U.S?" While I totally get it—adopting domestically was actually the first option we researched—I can't help but wonder if what these people are saying is that a child is less worthy of a family if he or she wasn't born in this country.
My reasons to 'go international' are similar to those of Amy Simmons, mother of 9, who adopted five children from Russia. The trend [in the U.S] is leaning more and more that you need to be a foster parent first, but there are no guarantees [of adoption]. We not only didn't want the child to get their hopes up and then possibly have to leave, but we didn't want our children to feel they may lose their siblings. It would be devastating for all of us."
Adopting parents around the world all have their own reasons for taking the adoption journey. And while I'm pretty open minded when it comes to answering questions like 'why not from here' by the curious, I just don't feel the need to defend my family's actions. Because we're not out to save the world, just find our child.
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You are right about the Foster care system. My Uncle and Aunt have been foster parents for years. They have adopted 2 of them, but many that they were told that they would get to keep suddenly got placed with someone else. The first baby they adopted was thru an adoption agency and it took several years to get her. That is when they started being foster parents and they have had many children come and go. The sad thing is you don’t know if you will get to keep them or not. I remember them saying that they were going to quit but it was only minutes later that they got another call with children that they could not find anyone else to take. They said yes as they always do. They know have a total of 4 adopted children and ussually they have at least 2 more foster kids. They never know when they will lose or gain a foster child. This is the life you sign on for when you become a foster parent.
My husband and I have discussed becoming adoptive parents after our children are older, but I will not become a foster parent. I can not take the uncertainty of who I will get to keep and who they will take away.
This world needs all kinds. People willing to be foster parents. People that adopt children from the US and people who adopt from other countries. It is a personal choice of what is right for you.
I am just glad that people are willing to open their hearts and lives to care for children that are in need.
Thank you and all others that adopt or become foster parents. All children need to be loved and taken care of no matter where they were born.
You know what? American or not, kids need loving families. We’re all the same and helping one child, helps us all, so go for it!