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Be a Less Miserable Mom

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Guest blogger Dani Klein Modisett: According to a study out of the University of Michigan, in their list of pleasurable activities, moms rank childcare lower than eating, exercising or watching TV. Taking care of small children rates only slightly higher than housework, working or commuting.

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I'm not sure if I'm comforted by this study because it helps me feel less guilty about my thoughts, or frightened for our kids. For those of us out there who would rather clean a toilet than try to get little Jimmy to eat a broccoli stalk, they offer suggestions for carving out happiness in your day. You can check them out or you can take my suggestions:

1. Try to engage in activities with your child that you can do while sleeping. Movies are good, and TV episodes of 22 minutes or longer.

2. Take the suggestion from '80s ad men and let Calgon take you away. Get some bubbles, lock the door and pretend you're Gypsy Rose Lee.

3. Flirt, not with dads at your kids' school -- too tacky -- but with random strangers. You still got it baby.

4. Eat with a knife and fork. No joke. Treat yourself like a lady and your family will too. It's too easy to scavenge around like an alley cat eating leftovers off of other people's plates.

5. Buy a lot of fancy teas. It's a mani-pedi in a cup. They're one of the cheaper indulgences and if you put enough sweetener -- fake or otherwise -- and cream in, it's practically a trip to England.

6. Listen to AM talk radio in the car and be grateful you are not an angry, intolerant person who really just needs a hug. Unless you are, and then go ask your kid for one.

7. Hang up Buddhist-like quotes on post-its around the house with sayings like, "Nothing means anything" or "I am not a fool."

8. End every struggle with your child abruptly by saying, "Because I'm the Mommy."

Dani Klein Modisett is the mom of two boys, and the creator/producer of "Afterbirth...Stories You Won't Read in Parents Magazine."


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2 comments so far | Post a comment now
Stacey June 9, 2008, 2:26 AM

I think that when it comes to raising children, we as moms need to remember that they are only little once. The time we have with them goes by so very quickly, and before we know it it’s gone. Remembering that makes you realize how little time you really have to spend with them and cherish them. Once time has passed you don’t get it back! Turn off the tv and phone often, and really spend some good quality time doing something you and your kids both enjoy doing together.

Jessica June 9, 2008, 8:52 AM

I am a mother of three young children, I have a 10 month old, two and four year old. There are some of those days were I understand this article. “Why doesn’t anyone ever send ME to my room?” I work full time and their father gets to be the stay at home daddy. I know he gets it rough sometimes but there are times when i just get home off a 8 or 9 hour shift that I rush home and the kids all immediately cling to me while I am cooking dinner I’m stepping over children and trying to clean the kitchen as I go by the time we all sit down to eat dinner I’m frazzled then we go throught the experience of trying to get the kids to sit in their seat and EAT the food not throw it not sit on me. I know they miss me and that is worse. They have seen Daddy all day so no matter what he does to keep them occupied it does not work. There are a few time I have let him cook but cooking for me (used) to be a great experinence. It just seems as if sometimes i just wanna yell to the heavens “I AM GOING TO MY ROOM LEAVE ME ALONE” But if i do that, poor daddy. There should be a place that mommies can step into that they could nap and bathe and no time actually passes in the real world. HAHA i wish. I love my kiddies but since when did i disappear?


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