Kate Hudson: Boys, Meet My Son

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Kate Hudson: Boys, Meet My Son

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Is it OK for a single mom to introduce her son to her dates?

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gallery of Kate Hudson's Men

Since filing for divorce in November 2006, Kate Hudson has been linked with her share of guys: Dax Shephard, Owen Wilson, and most recently, Lance Armstrong. In fact, on Father's Day, Kate and Ryder had brunch with ex Chris Robinson, his girlfriend, and Lance and his three kids. (Can you imagine?)

Kate seems to have a happy relationship with her son and ex-husband. But some have wondered if bringing so many men into her son's life is good for Ryder.

We spoke with single mother Rachel Sarah, author of Single Mom Seeking: Playdates, Blind Dates, and Other Dispatches from the Dating World, for her perspective.

"C'mon--Kate Hudson's been in three relationships since her divorce-- not three hundred," she says. "And Ryder's age makes these introductions much easier. When Kate started to date Dax Shepard, for instance, Ryder was 3 years old. As I said in my momlogic piece When Your Date Meets Your Kid: 'When you have a wee little one who's more interested in mashed bananas than mommy's boyfriend, this is easy-peasy.' Sure, Ryder was past the mashed bananas stage--he was still a preschooler. I don't think that little Ryder will be traumatized by that short of a love affair. In most of the celebrity sightings, Kate and Dax were seen on family outings with Ryder and her family. No doubt, the 3-year-old was being doted on by his grandparents."

She also wonders if Ryder already knew Lance Armstrong and his children through Owen Wilson. "Is it possible that their kids already knew each other?" she wonders. "After all, Kate's former ex, Owen Wilson, is good friends with Lance," (which is also kind of weird). "Perhaps they've already hung out together in social circles -- in which case, going out for brunch really wouldn't be such a big deal."

Rachel says it's the double standard that single moms face that really gets under her skin. "This is what irks me: We criticize celebrity single moms like Kate Hudson for dating again, and finding love, but how about the celebrity single dads?" she says. "Who's keeping them in check?"

21 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

What is she supposed to do? Sit home and twirl her thumbs? She’s a beautiful and successful woman who clearly doesn’t need a man. And her son’s father is in the picture, so I’m not sure why this is a relevant issue in the first place.

- oaky231

Posted 06/20/08 01:11 AM

I grew up watching my mother date guy after guy. The only thing I learned was they were more important than my brother and I were. From the perspective of someone who’s gone through it, I believe it’s a bad idea. I guess if she were to explain, to a certain extent, the dating process once he reached a certain age it might help his understanding. I guess it also depends on how these dates go while Ryder is around that will have an impact. I don’t care if it’s the mother or the father, for the most part I don’t believe a child should watch people come in and out of their lives at someone else’s whim, and a child should be of more importance to a parent (not that they aren’t) that a prospective suitor should have to meet certain things to meet a child. Like seriousness in a relationship, the attitude and concideration that meets the parents plan for raising their child. I can’t explain the effect it had on my brother and I to watch these men come and go, all I can really say is that it had a profoundly negative effect on us. Babysitters, relatives, and the other parent are all suitable people to watch a child so that the parent caring for them can have their adult time. They shouldn’t be taking their adult time at the expense of their kids. I find that to be a problem with the States these days, parents saying “what about me?” and blaming TV and celebrities for their influence on kids instead of teaching their children themselves.

- H.W.

Posted 06/21/08 02:46 PM

My husband and the father of my children died in Oct. 2003, when my girls were 3 and 5. I started dating a man in November of 2004, and didn’t introduce them for over 6 months. I married this man last October. I don’t think children younger than teens should be introduced to “mommy’s friend” unless it is serious.

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