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Who's Sleeping with Your Husband?

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The other woman wants you to know--your husband is cheating and she's loving it. Find out why.

It feels like an epidemic. From politicians sleeping with high-priced prostitutes, the cover of New York magazine revealing The Secret Lives of Married Men and recent allegations in Vanity Fair magazine that former president Clinton had an affair with actress Gina Gershon, we're constantly being bombarded with reports about infidelity.

Research shows up to 60% of men will have affairs while they're married. That's 3 out of 5! What drives them to do it, and what can we do to make sure it doesn't happen to us?

We went straight to the source to uncover the real story about why our husbands are cheating. You'll hear from four self-proclaimed mistresses and a loud and proud prostitute as they reveal why our husbands are turning to them for sex and companionship. No woman expects her husband will be the one who cheats. But the odds aren't in your favor. Find out why, how you can tell, and what you can do if it's happening to you. 

Have you ever wondered what married men tell their mistresses about you and why they're cheating?



Find out what your husband tells HER about YOU and what you can do to affair-proof your marriage right NOW. Click on part 2 below.


Take our Sex, Lies and Cheating Poll.

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Click here to see the Hollywood's Rumored 'Other Women' Gallery.


About the Experts...
spacer dr shannon fox
Shannon Fox is a licensed family therapist in Los Angeles and a mother of three.
  rabbi sherre hirsch
Rabbi Sherre Hirsch is a mother of three and the author of We Plan, God Laughs, and offers non-denominational spiritual advice.

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222 comments so far | Post a comment now
PNR June 4, 2008, 12:38 AM

So many of these posts are justifying with “my needs”, “my needs”, “my needs”. How selfish are you men. Most women today have jobs, raise kids, and continue to be the “partner” that is stuck with the upkeep on the home. Yet, after all this, you guys are still worried about “my needs”, “my needs”, “my needs”. Maybe you should try putting half as much in to the relationship as you expect from it!!!!

Anonymous June 4, 2008, 12:40 AM

men had as many women as they could get for thousands of years…and now suddenly in the last 200 hundred years were supposed to give it all

Jack June 4, 2008, 12:40 AM

Who’s sleeping with your husband?
It may be another man. I’m a gay man, in my 50’s, who is masculine, attractive, intelligent, interesting, well educated, and successful. I’m attracted to married men and they are attracted to me - for friendship that includes passionate, intimate sex. These guys are CEO’s, doctors, lawyers, successful business professionals and community leaders. They’re not going to leave their wives for the love of another man, they’re not gay (most of them). But, they might be in the arms of another man, having passionate, sweaty sex with him and loving it. The formula for keeping a man is simple. Make him feel like a real man. Someone you want, and can’t get enough of. Not someone you need for financial security, social position, and to give you children and grandchildren. You can have it all but you have to give it your all, all the time. Otherwise, ladies, they’re yours to have and mine to hold.

Nay June 4, 2008, 12:55 AM

Almost every man I sleep with has a girlfriend. Even today, she calls, he talks and then he is all under (on top of me). It’s not even about wanting to be the mistress. The guy is cool, we have fun and he cannot be as naughty as he wants to be with her. It’s fun for us both. I won’t ruin their relationships. When the girlfriend contacts me, I just pretend to be the lesbian friend and apologize for the confusion. I like it how it is. Most men cheat. You can be a great girlfriend, I am a better friend. ;)

AB June 4, 2008, 12:58 AM

I’m not married but I am in a serious relationship. And he did cheat on me. But he came back because “sorry about the immodesty” but I’m a damn good woman. Unlike the little tramp that did steal him from me for a minute. And I do love him so I did take him back and we are trying to make a go of things. It’s not easy and I’ve already told him that if we decide to get married we really should see a couples counceler before hand so as not to go into a marrige without help. But when it comes down to it if you are the other woman I hope you get facial herpes and we’ll see how many married men want your low down dirty grimy nasty self.

Anonymous June 4, 2008, 12:59 AM

I love my girlfriend but wont deny my needs to sleep with other women…a mistress is not a wife..and that used to be enough

Anonymous June 4, 2008, 1:01 AM

men should be allowed to have open relationships if they so desire..free love

Female (Az) June 4, 2008, 1:01 AM

I’m a mistress of a GREAT guy, And yes, DO YOUR Job WIFES,, and they wouldn’t cheat,,, SEX is a BIG part of a relationship,awhhh but Iv’e taught him MORE than he ever knew,She’s a STIFF,Bag over face & Body,,HE LOVES oral,and learned to do it quite well now,something you never give him or let him do,, how sad is that !!! I AM NEVER going to stop seeing him,, Sorry poor DeAnna someday you’ll know ALL about HIM & Myself, I will be more than happy to tell you now,, oh wait I have,, how’s the new job going,,,,,, LMAO

renee June 4, 2008, 1:05 AM

I beleieve if a man cheats its because he’s not getting satisfied at home. Many women have jobs, a house to tend to and children to raise. Therefore taking care of all those things on a daily basis leaves us drained! At the same time not realizing our men need some attention also.Then you see the women who are drop dead beautiful and know it therefore thinking their man would never cheat because shes a trophy wife.. she takes advatage of that. Meanwhile he wants a woman to get dirty in bed and not be self absorbed and just be a sex toy in bed. Just that excitement away from the little perfect life and have some fun!

jk June 4, 2008, 1:11 AM

GUYS, I AM A SINGLE GUY 25 (WOMEN SAY I’M GOOD LOOKING) WELL ENDOWED AND I AM A BARTENDER. I HAD WOMEN COME UP TO ME AND ASK ME FOR MY NUMBER OR VISA-VERSA. WHILE THEIR HUSBANDS GO TO THE BATHROOM, OUT FOR A SMOKE,ETC. 8 OUT OF TEN IS A DEFINITE HOOK-UP THE NEXT DAY OR WEEKEND. MOST WOMEN ARE 30’S-40;S BUT VERY HOT. THEY ARE MARRIED TO DENTISTS, DOCTORS, LAWYERS,CEO’S,ON SO ON. MOST ARE VERY WEALTHY. ONE EVEN PURCHASED A VEHICLE FOR ME, SEX WAS GREAT ! THE REASON WHY ALL THE WOMEN ARE CHEATING……………….EVERYONE SAYS THAT THEIR SPOUSE IS MORE CONCERNED ABOUT MAKING MONEY THAN ANYTHING ELSE.THEY HAVE NO TIME.ANOTHER WOMENS HUSBAND MAKES SO MUCH MONEY THAT SHE SHOWERS ME WITH THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS A MONTH, SOMETIMES A WEEK. THESE WOMEN ARE LONELY ! BUT I’M SINGLE AND LOVING LIFE. ONE AFFAIR I CARRY ON TAKES A ROOM AT THE GARDEN CITY HOTEL, AFTER MY SHIFT I GO MEET UP WHILE THEIR HUBBY IS AWAY. GUYS..PAY MORE ATTENTION TO YOUR WIFE OR THEY WILL GET BORED.

Betty June 4, 2008, 1:12 AM

I don’t think “sleeping” is what they’re doing.

Mike June 4, 2008, 1:12 AM

There are many different reasons that married people cheat. Although more husbands cheat than wives, I don’t think the difference is as great as is often believed. Lots of wives cheat on their husbands, I know several personally who have. I think that men and women cheat for different reasons. I think that when men choose to cheat, the number 1 reason is that their wife has become overweight and unattractive, and/or has lost interest in sex. I think that when women choose to cheat, the reasons are more complex and varied. The way for a woman to keep a man from cheating is simple. Be nice to him, talk to him as respectfully as if he’s your best friend, stay thin, and stay interested in sex with him. 95% of husbands would never cheat on such a woman. But such women are, unfortunately, fairly uncommon.

Jane June 4, 2008, 1:12 AM

I slept with a married man about 15 years ago. It lasted for a year. The reason I started sleeping with him was simple attraction, the reason I continued was that it was so convenient that he was not available to be part of my life. It was actually nice to be able to have really great sex with no actual relationship, the only expectation he had was sex. I did not have to do his laundry, meet his mother, be entertaining for any great length of time. We never went anywhere, never went out to eat, never had friends together. There was absolutely nothing I had to give besides the sex and at that time in my life, that was all I had time for.

In retrospect, it was a horrible thing to do. I did not contemplate his wife until I accidentally met her at a completely random social event. That is when I had to end it because the fact that he was married became much too real. He had told me they were separating, had a horrible marriage, etc. When I saw them together, I had to realize he had been lying to me - they were very much together and very much liked each other. I still can’t figure out why he wanted to be with me. His wife was much more attractive than I, had a better job, seemed quite attentive to him, and really was a much better catch than I.

I am ashamed to have been the other woman and really don’t know why he or I did what we did.

fly on the wall June 4, 2008, 1:16 AM

Infidelity is a fact of life… Its not pretty its not fair… but if we accept it happens marriages do not need to end and relationships can grow stronger if people learn to deal with reality

Mariah June 4, 2008, 1:16 AM

I can’t even believe that people listen to these women. What trash. People cheat because it’s now socially acceptable. Pretty sad times we are living in….

Brian June 4, 2008, 1:20 AM

I’m married, age 40, with a lovely daughter and I have to say, I’m probably “ripe for the picking” as they say. I was the high-power job, work-late parent for two years while my wife was home studying. After some adjustments and “retooling” I -STILL- have the high-power job (I’m one of only two or three people in my entire state who can do what I do), but since my wife started her own high-power job, I’ve basically been a single parent (my wife’s job is in a city over 200 mi. away). Here’s my take: First of all, I am now doing what my wife did, with VERY limited babysitting help (NO 9-5 daycare at all). AND I don’t have a grandparent staying with us as she did. But, I have to say, it’s not that hard (though my daughter is 2 1/2). And my wife is the first to admit that I complain a heck of a lot less than she did when she had NO job and took care of her. And in addition to just basically taking good care of her, my daughter is advanced in most skills and speaks two languages (which I taught her). So why does my wife still pick away at everything I do and teach me she doesn’t love or respect me at all? I often wonder why she married me. So many of the women I meet see how great I am with my daughter in spite of how important a job I have and I’ll tell you, if I wanted to leave any given restaurant, store, playpark or library with some attractive woman’s phone number I absolutely could, but I haven’t given in yet. I still love my wife but I’m not sure how long I can hold out. I understand that since women do not have the physical power men do that their only recourse when they’re unhappy is emotional warfare, but I’ve been nothing but supportive and haven’t asked her for a darn thing this year (including sex which generally seems a chore for her) and yet the shrewish belittling and attacks continue. My daughter has already asked me why mommy is so mad. I am not alone. I know many men who are in my position or something like it. I used to have a very romantic temperment. If I found a woman who helped me be the man I want to be again, it would be very hard to resist. Let me just suggest this: if your husband doesn’t hit you, don’t use your worst emotional attacks against him. Be civil, talk, and don’t belittle him. I take offense at the poster who said men need stroking. I don’t need stroking, I just need someone who doesn’t pick away at every darn thing I do. Your husband wants you to be honest, just realize that you don’t have to emotionally browbeat him in order to get him to listen to you. And if he won’t immediately do everything the way you want it done? Well, you just talk, in a rational way and not full of anger and don’t treat him like a child unless he is actually behaving like one. Women have deeply rooted and irrational prejudices about men just as men do about women.

Valarie June 4, 2008, 1:24 AM

I have been married for 39 yrs.I had an affair that ended because he died.The kid’s my husband and i had were all that we had in common.He knew about the affair,but didn’t care because he didn’t have to spend any of his free time with me.I am not ugly.I have a great body,am intellegent,and have a good job.I cheated because he made me feel alive and not like a hired hand..

Jason June 4, 2008, 1:24 AM

I’m a single guy. Decent looking enough. Only two of my male friends have ever cheated on their wives. That’s out of a circle of a dozen male friends. As for me, I’ve had affairs with over a dozen married women (none in my circle of friends). It’s so easy to talk these women out of their panties. I get sex and don’t have to spend any extra time with them, or even spend much money on them. When I get bored, I move on to another one. So many women out there today are more than willing to cheat on their husbands. They’ve become far worse than married men. I’ll never get married. I do not trust any woman. I’ve seen too much.

Angela June 4, 2008, 1:26 AM

I was married once to a cheater, and I firmly believe that the environment that they are raised in has alot to do with it. My ex-father in-law used to cheat on my ex-mother-in law, and he did it in front of his children without consequences. I asked my m-inlaw why she tolerated such behavior,and she said that as long as he brought home the money to take care of their children, she didn’t care… so you see, for some, monkey see, monkey do. My ex once told me that I was the “kind” to marry, but the biggest shock to him was when I left . Now he can have all of the mistresses he seeks.. And NO, he wasn’t neglected….

Tracy June 4, 2008, 1:29 AM

The fact is, is that men don’t marry the mistress’es. These woman usually don’t marry even if they do look nice because no man wants these women. That’s why they’re alone in life. They aren’t worth it. When it’s all said and done, men know who they really want to settle down with.


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