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Living without My Husband

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Guest blogger mom-on-the-edge says: My heart was racing. I told myself I wasn't going to do this and, yet, here I was calling my husband -- first.

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It had been two days since we talked. I imagined he was having a much easier time with our separation. Maybe he was too busy having fun to miss me. But, wasn't he missing our son? I couldn't stand to be away from the little guy for even a few hours. How could he stand not seeing him for a few days?

He answered, "Hello?"

"Hi!" I tried not to sound desperate, "How are you?"

"Good. I'm heading out to a baseball game..."

"I miss you! WE miss you!" I failed. "He almost took a step today..." I started to cry, "You should come home."

"I'll stop by after the game."

Like a professional athlete preparing for the big game, I used the power of visualization and created a positive outcome. He would walk in the door and like long lost lovers we would embrace, not letting go for a long time. I would look into his eyes and together we would see the absurdity of the situation. "I miss you! I miss YOU!" A passionate kiss, I would be enveloped by his body...

Our son fell asleep before he made it home.

"Hi."

"Hi."

"I miss you."

"I miss you too!"

Grabbing, kissing, we ripped each other's clothes off.

"I love you."

"I love you too!"

And, that's when I tasted the alcohol lingering on his tongue. He got drunk at the game. As he lay sleeping in bed I wondered if he would feel the same way about me tomorrow. And, if our little boy was going to take his first steps while his dad was at a bar drinking with his friends.


next: Attention Baby Disorder
6 comments so far | Post a comment now
Sharron July 28, 2008, 2:30 PM

I think you need to have a conversation when he’s sober to really suss out if you guys can save your marriage.

Anonymous July 28, 2008, 7:14 PM

If you guys are still ripping each other’s clothes off I’d say there’s still hope! Get back to counseling!

teashan August 13, 2008, 5:12 AM

They say I Love you! Sweet conversations of sugar coated bullsh*t about how they want a family to be good fathers grow old
2gether and we EAT IT UP like it is our last meal. But when it matters We(women-mothers)R alone with our children
during the 1st word walk fall.They we R expected 2 stay while they(men) get 2 still enjoy a some what single(no kids) life and they dont even care that we havent been out socially since the child came or that maybe the child needs their
fathers influence or that being a mother
is a full time job with NO TIME OFF and maybe if Men(fathers)could help us more then maybe we could spend time on ourselves so we could b that Sexy Fun Girl they fell in love with

Fashion Merchandising October 12, 2010, 1:55 PM

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Merchant Account December 24, 2010, 3:29 AM

You gave me some excellent ideas for my own website.

Wilton Schub January 24, 2011, 9:42 PM

subscribing to this


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