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Over the Shoulder Boulder Holder Redux

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No one can seem to build a better mouse trap, so why not stop with all the boob trap inventions?


Breasts come in all shapes and sizes but for many of us moms, "perky" is a word we can't really use to describe ours these days. That's why the Lord made bras. Shopping for the perfect gravity-defying brassiere isn't easy. The bra choices at the local department stores are bigger than a porn star's t*ts.

A new study says that if we're not careful, our bras might actually be harming our "dirty pillows" by causing irreparable damage to our boob ligaments. We're a little bit skeptical of this research for a couple of reasons. First, in our own study -- the one we conduct every time we look into the mirror -- it seems gravity, age, and breastfeeding are key factors to our somewhat saggy appearance. Second, the study was done by "scientists" who are also in the process of marketing a new kind of sports bra. The study, conducted by Joanna Scurr and Wendy Hedger, is full of fascinating discoveries like "breasts don't just move side to side, they also move up and down." Hmmm, makes us wonder if the women who did the research are either A) flat chested or B) actually men using women's names and who enjoy watching a bouncing boob now and then -- all in the name of "science."

Can't we stop studying breasts? The invention of the bra is now over 100 years old -- all the possible bra designs should be pretty much nailed by now. Guess not, because new bra inventions keep popping out every year. Check out these outrageous designs.

next: 16 Kids Dead in 2 Months
5 comments so far | Post a comment now
dawntrenee July 29, 2008, 4:04 PM

Now if they could just design a bra that gave support, comfort and could go in the washer and dryer. Let’s spend some time on that.

Kenni July 29, 2008, 7:36 PM

OMG…these bras are hilarious!

Rrika July 30, 2008, 2:43 PM

oh heeellllll to the no!

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