8 Things I Learned from a Porn Magazine
I've produced wild photo shoots and seen more naked bodies than you'd believe. And here are 8 things I learned that may surprise you.
1) The work environment is just that--work: Believe it or not, my 9-5 was a lot like working at a mainstream magazine: Every morning, I'd grab my coffee and head to the office for a day of idea meetings, editing stories, and conducting interviews. And, despite the photos of naked women lining the walls, poring over layouts of legs spread, and working in a mainly all-male office, my co-workers were perfect gentlemen and I never felt uncomfortable being female.
2) The girls look 'normal': Here's a question I'd get asked almost daily: "Do the centerfolds really look like that?" The answer is, not really. Labias get sculpted, breasts get de-veined, and waists are whittled down to the size of toothpicks, all with a click of a mouse and a program called Photoshop. What's more, lots of the girls--18 to 22-year-old strippers, or just pretty girls found in malls--had surgery. One even had three boob jobs, to make her breasts "perfect." Don't get me wrong--I'm not saying these women are dogs--but they certainly aren't the doe-eyed, pouty-lipped, tanned bedroom goddesses they resemble in the final product. Case in point: Even the centerfolds would flip through their glossy photo spreads and exclaim "Wow! Is that really me?"
3) Women are competitive: It should come as no surprise that not all the models were friends. And it makes sense--get any group of girls together who are vying for one prize (In this case, Centerfold of the Month/Year), and things are bound to get catty. One girl even stole another's platinum jewelry (a gift from the magazine) and had it replaced with a cheap imposter. And another time, one girl spread a nasty rumor about another to upset the competition.
4) My sex life sizzled: OK, this one's a little embarrassing, but it's true. When you look at sex, think about sex, and talk about sex all day long, it takes its toll. I wish I could say I was desensitized by all the sexual content, but the truth is, it just boosted my libido big time. My boyfriend even complained he was worn out from my robust desire!
5) Glam photo shoots are all for show: Given the photos are supposed to portray a fantasy (sex in a meadow, car garage, etc.) but the truth is, being on set just depressed me. Although it was never confirmed, many models seemed drunk while shooting. It was as if they needed to be numb just to get through the day. It made me sad. Sometimes I wanted to ask these girls why they did it, but I wasn't their friend. I was just doing my job.
6) Denial ain't just a river in Egypt: Turns out, I didn't need to ask. Many women defended their jobs without being asked. Some would say, "I feel empowered when I strip," or "My mom is so proud of what I do." Call me judgmental, but this was a hard pill to swallow. Chances are most mothers would object to a daughter who gets naked for money. But at the end of the day, it was just none of my concern.
7) It's all business: Once the girls achieve a certain title, their job gets busy. Besides appearing naked in the magazine, they also have to join the magazine's empire, which includes making erotic movies, dancing at the company's strip club, and having molds of their genitals made for sex toys. I often wondered if they realized what they had in store when they first came on board.
8) I was a hypocrite: In the end, I couldn't resolve my conflicting feelings--These girls have low self-esteem...Well, maybe it's not so bad...Ew, gross!--about the porn industry with my job. I grew tired of having a raunchy, sexual job and longed to fill my days with substance, so I left the magazine after 10 months. And while I attest that porn can be a healthy outlet to revive a snoozing sex life, I just couldn't handle it 24/7. Although the girls seem content with what they do, at the end of the day, it's just not for me.
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