Chuck E. Cheese: I Smell A Rat

Chuck E. Cheese: I Smell A Rat

Friday, September 26, 2008

filed under: kid logic

"I've seen Hell and it goes by the name of Chuck E. Cheese."

Momlogic's Andrea: Within two minutes of visiting Chuck E. Cheese for the first time there were tears. Not my toddler's. Mine.

Never in my life have I been in such a crowded filthy, loud, urine-soaked and dangerous den of iniquity -- not since riding a New York subway at rush hour.

At the moment that pimply teen door attendant stamped our hands I was calculating how to convince my toddler that we should get out of there. But it was too late. I watched in terror as my daughter ran toward a multi-colored climbing structure.

Within a second she was gone.

What I didn't realize was that the tubes connected to a labyrinth of other tubes that ran the entire ceiling of this heinous pizza parlor. The only way out, a slide at the far end. There are a few tiny little windows on the side of the tubes but they're so streaked with pizza grease you can't see though them. What's worse the opening of the maze is too small to allow an adult to go in.

I started to panic.

What if she never came down? What if she was up there crying because she can't figure out how to get out of the rat maze? Were there kids living up there - ala Lord of the Flies, faces streaked with tomato sauce as war paint starting their own civilization?

I waited, trying to figure out the best way to tell my husband I'd lost our daughter. Or if she ever did ever come out how would ever find enough Purel to decontaminate her.

I could feel the tears coming so instead of completely losing it I decided to check out the surroundings before I made that call to Missing Persons. Here's a sampling of what I saw:

A little girl sitting a motorized car, expressionless as the roadster bounced up and down - her parents nowhere in sight.
Six boys, hanging from the "Clock Chair." A single seat "ride" that moves clockwise around the face of a clock. The weight of the mini hooligans almost toppling over the metal contraption onto some unsuspecting toddlers.
Two moms, both looking nearly suicidal, silently drinking beer in a booth strewn with half-eaten pizzas.
Hopped up on sugar, a small boy screaming as his mom desperately tried to explain she was out of tokens.

What didn't I see? Attendants looking after the pandemonium. Nope, the place looked like the lunatics had taken over the asylum. And I was half hoping someone would put me in a straight jacket.

Finally when 10 long minutes had passed, I convinced an older kid to go up, find my daughter and lure her out with a piece of cheese. Just at that moment my little girl gleefully slid down the slide. Happy and laughing hysterically she ran back to the entrance of the maze and scrambled back up. I realized at that moment she was already addicted to Chuck E. Crack. Is there detox for such a thing?

Did I just get a bad taste of Chuck E. Cheese or is it truly hell on earth?

filed under: kid logic

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Chuck E. Cheeses in Los ANgeles are full of lower income family’s and their 10 kids (All under the age of 10) It’s over crowded and what I hate the most is that parents let their children play unmonitored. Kids run around bumping into adults and younger children…It’s chaotic. They should have a couple of resturant attendants around making sure all rules are inforced…since the parents can’t do that themselves…

- not important

Posted 09/27/08 07:45 PM

I once heard a guy say he had done two tours in Vietnam and been to Chuck E Cheese once. If given a choice he would rather go back to Nam… Chuck e cheese hell!!

- Chuckecheese hater

Posted 10/15/08 03:55 PM

All the samplings are sad. Its like Chuck E.Cheese is an asylum full of lunatics that were never cared for(as in being tranquilized). And for the poor kids, its like they are being kidnapped by chuck e cheese to stay there forever. It sucks! I’ll never tAke my kid or my neice there, i’d rather cook them homemade dinner

- chucksucks

Posted 12/05/08 05:26 AM

I really honestly thing that you exagerated alot not even a little bit because ive went to Chuck e. cheese all the time when I was little and even had birthday parties there. There service is great when you have alot of people they give you a discount and workers give your children extra tokens if there out. So all I see here is someone who lied about her story and probaly don’t even have a child but if you do she loved chuck e cheese just like me.

- jij

Posted 12/05/08 03:28 PM

my daughter took her son to chucky cheeses he got hurt on one of the rides because there something slippery on it. we assume it was pizza grease thats not the just the problem he split his head open and not 1 person that worked there helped. he was bleeding everywhere.needless to say he ended up with stitches oh he just turned 2

- grandma

Posted 12/09/08 09:23 AM

I know how everyone feels. That rat’s nest (literally) is a stomach flu waiting to happen. Pimply teen assistants who are probably on drugs, greasy disgusting toddlers who keep shouting in your ear, and drunk parents who have to drive the kids home. It’s literally hell! The parents spend almost $40 on tickets, and what do those rugrats get for exchange? Some cheap, knock-off, Chinese-imported plastic bug or some rubber snakes. RIP-OFF! It’s mayhem in the form of a 5-year-old’s Las Vegas. And what’s with the frikin animatronic mouse robot show? It gives the lamest performance that kids don’t even watch. What’s up with that? I hate that urine-soaked, foul-smelling, greasy helluva pizzeria. I agree with that D-Con pic. DOWN WITH THE RAT!!!!!

- Barbie

Posted 12/15/08 07:54 PM

Hey, give the rat a break. Chuck E. Cheese’s is not meant for adults, so adults - stop your bickering. The kids love it, and that’s all that matters. They haven’t food poisoned you or anything. And some of your stories are made up!!!! It’s not for adult purposes, anyways. It’s for the KIDS!

- Carolina

Posted 12/15/08 08:10 PM

The motorized car was there and I just stopped my kid before she climbed under it for her token. That was the 63rd token i had given her and she got 13 tickets out of it! I’m never going there again!

- Hate chuck E. Cheese

Posted 02/08/09 01:19 AM

Please. I am sorry to disagree with your psychotic way of looking at normal things. Your over-melodramatic comments about your child having fun in a playground truly shows the little time you have spend with her outside of your house. I wonder if you get this schizophrenic with your kid in your own house as well. Do you chase her into the bathroom and stalk them until their out? I think your attitude not only to her having fun else where but to all chuck e cheese totally reflects a great amount of self doubt and even fear. Where you scared of her not coming out of the game or leaving you unprotected of normal people all around you. I just hope you don’t shield your daughter so much in that you end up making her realize the kind of mother she has. Good luck.

- Mary

Posted 03/08/09 06:58 PM

So, KarenSamuels, you wouldn’t bring a kid to an MLB game? There’s beer there. What about a little league game where there was beer? You do know that beer is for grownups, right? Are you a member of MADD, by any chance? Shall we banish demon rum from the face of the earth? As for the actual post: sentence fragments. The kind that jump at you. Squatting on the page like dog turds. Full-stops. Not always necessary. You know.

- Paimon

Posted 03/12/09 11:33 AM

I have had my daughter’s birthday parties at Chuck E Cheese for the last 3 years and she absolutely loves it. Our Chuck E Cheese is very clean and the party section is clean and neat. It is loud but children are loud when they are having fun. Some of you need to lighten up and don’t go if you think it’s germ infested. However, anywhere you go there are germs and bacteria and your children can become sick (like school). KEEP THEM HOME IN A BUBBLE!!!

- Lisa

Posted 03/26/09 01:19 PM

Yea I dont like that place.. One time my little cousin got lost because she got in one of the tunnels and she must of climbed out hwen we werent looking. It was scary. And another time this boy came up to my cousin and grabbed her hand and tried to take the token out of her hand and my mom flicked him in the head and then he ran off with like noone watching him..

- May

Posted 03/26/09 01:32 PM

My kids are grown now with their own kids. CEC was a germ infested place then. Now you have to not only be aware of the millions of germs and dirt but you need to be aware that at least in the Tacoma WA CEC there was a sex offender in the bathroom trying to persuade a very young boy into sex acts! You really can’t be too careful about where you take your children and making sure you keep them in your site.

- cathyt

Posted 03/26/09 02:13 PM

In response to your comment: “What didn’t I see? Attendants looking after the pandemonium. Nope, the place looked like the lunatics had taken over the asylum.” Did it ever occur to everyone that parents should take responsibility for their own children. Places such as this are not a replacement for a parent nor are the attendants “baby sitters”. If I recall there are signs not to leave your children unattended, that includes the small ones and the older ones that can cause problems. No different from McDonalds play area, you never even see attendants in those play areas. Too many parents don’t take enough responsibility for their own children when they are out in public. It’s frustrating.

- Julie from Michigan

Posted 03/26/09 02:36 PM

What I am surprised by is how shocked everyone is. There have been numerous times I have been to a Chuck E. Cheese and have witness things first hand. However, I have done something about it too. I don’t allow my kids to wander off without my husband or me. Which all too often parents do. That is just one of the things that drives me nuts. One such example, my son was playing the skeet ball game, there was a younger child playing…without his parent. He didn’t roll the balls, but threw them. After one nearly hit my son, I went looking for his mother. I told her that she needed to get up and monitor her child because he was throwing the balls and nearly hit my child. She was offended at first, but quickly got up. She knew she was in the wrong and someone called her on it. The sad thing about the situation is that C.E.C. knows that parents are going to go here for their kids and unfortunately instead of stepping up and making things better—they have failed. I do encourage all of you to speak up though. Otherwise, the problem(s) will continue.

- Veronica

Posted 03/26/09 02:37 PM

Chuckie cheese in los angeles and surrounding areas are cool!

- sage

Posted 04/28/09 01:34 PM

We were just at the Exton, PA one yesterday. It was clean and the kids were all behaved. However, my daugther did get lost in the tube and we had to send in other kids to pull her out. In the event of a real emergency such as a fire, I am really not sure how any of the smallest children would have been evacuated in time. The one end of the tube structure is a dead-end, any adults pulling a child out would likely have a very very difficult time.

- James

Posted 11/23/09 04:47 AM

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