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Five Ways for Moms to Cut Costs

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Guest blogger, NorEastMom came up with ways to cut costs WITHOUT cutting your wrists.

mom drinking boxed wine at picnic table

The Lighter Side: five ways for moms to cut costs:

1. Go green and hit up consignment shops. Do this long enough, and that same rush you get from the killer Nordstrom sale will be begin to happen when you come across a pair of Robeez still in the box for eight bucks. If your friends are grossed out tell them, "I'm saving the planet by re-wearing strangers' clothes over and over. This shirt still smells like B.O. when it rains. Wanna sniff it?" Trust me, they'll shut their yap.

2. This Christmas, keep it simple. Cardboard boxes, sticks, rocks, waterguns, crazy glue. These items will keep any child busy for hours. As for what you put under the tree, wrap everything. Socks, new carseats, toothpaste, you name it. "The elves make Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, mommy?" This year they do, baby ... let your kids know they're lucky to have even the basics. You can mop up the tears with the new socks.

3. Romantic dinners in. Ordering takeout from your favorite restaurant eliminates tip and the inflated alcohol bill. Plus side is, you can both dine naked, or dress like a French maid, hell, even a Scottish hooker (that would be a regular hooker costume with a bit of plaid thrown in). Attire like this wouldn't go over big at Nobu.

4. Become a boxed wine bitch. This may seem extreme to some, but if you and your husband like your wine, you may be spending more than $50 a week on this habit. There are some respectable boxed brands out there now that are tasty and affordable ($20 for 3L, or 4 bottles), and boxes keep longer than an open bottle. Drink it out of plastic cups to give the night that "meeting in a cheap motel" allure.

5. And finally, to survive the recession, get over yourself. Being globally conscious doesn't just mean recycling yogurt containers, it means recognizing how amazingly fortunate you are to live in this country, with multiple conveniences at your fingertips. So if you're cranky that you have to give up your Fuji water for awhile, remember that plenty of mommies on the planet are carrying home 10 gallons of well water right now ... on their heads. Fill up with gratitude about what you do have, and make ends meet with a smile. But make sure you save up those hardship stories to tell your kids when they complain about the recession.

next: Video: Sarah Palin Plays the Flute
9 comments so far | Post a comment now
absolute October 2, 2008, 10:28 AM

Why is there a reference to suicide in the headline?

Alison October 2, 2008, 10:49 AM

Who is giving a kid crazy glue for Christmas? Do they stay busy because they just glued themself to the wall? Stupid. And no, giving kids presents that you know are going to dissapoint them isn’t cool at all. And by the way, if you can afford wine for yourself, you can afford something better than Kraft Macaroni and Cheese for the kids.

Naomi October 2, 2008, 12:43 PM

c’mon people, this is not meant to be taken literally. it’s just getting back to basics and to remember that we have it a lot better than most.

Anonymous October 2, 2008, 3:32 PM

Really people. Naomi’s right. Get a grip. It’s called hyperbole. The points are in there, but it’s entertaining.

Anonymous October 3, 2008, 8:14 AM

If you think this article is serious in any way then you need to purchase yourself a sense of humor. I hear there was a price cut on them at Walmart this week. OK, sit back down and drop your purse cause that was also a JOKE. October 3, 2008, 9:09 AM

Hey Alison- maybe someone should buy you a “back massager” for Christmas so that you LOSEN UP! These tips are hilarious and sensible. NorEastMom I LOVED your article about learning from a single dad. Good stuff. Keep it up!

Jen Riggles October 3, 2008, 10:49 AM

Thanks NorEastMom!! You are just what the doctor ordered during these scary, sometimes dreadful days of economic woes! For everyone else bent out of shape by a splash of sarcasm and incredible wit, you might just need a serving of “loosen the heck up” soup.

TINA October 3, 2008, 11:13 AM

I understand this is a rough time for many people but why pick at every little thing written in this blog? It’s all in fun and I enjoyed reading it. Keep up the fun advice! I can’t wait to get me a box of wine, while i let my children play with super glue and macaroni…what a creative combo! Lol!!

Big R Dris October 7, 2008, 10:19 AM

Ok, I am definitely getting wine over my kids getting food. How else am I supposed to get over the economic crisis?

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