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I Told My Husband to Get a "Happy Ending"

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I don't consider it cheating -- and when he finally got his "massage," I was happy for him!

husband excited to get a happy ending massage

Guest blogger, Gina: About four years ago while my husband and I were out to dinner with friends, the subject of "full service" massages came up. My husband said he had never had one and the men at the table seemed surprised -- apparently men get them at least once before they get married. Anyway, I told him that if he had any interest that I wouldn't mind if he went for it. Ever since that day, my friends and I had been wondering when he would actually go through with it.

About every other month, he went for a massage. Sometimes to places that seemed on the up and up and sometimes to places that you think may offer the full rubdown. Every time he would come back I'd ask, "Well?" He never could get it done -- and we continued to razz him about it. We all knew he wanted to do it and it was pretty adorable to see him try and fail.

Then one day, he traveled to Asia for business. He and his friends went to a massage parlor. Apparently over there, the menu is more blatant. They even offer "full service" -- and they mean it. He opted for partial -- hands only. He proudly called me up immediately after to tell me all the details. When I answered the phone he said to me, "Fresh Pepper?" I knew exactly what he meant and we laughed for about 60 seconds straight. He told me that when some of his co-workers opted out because they were married, he bragged about the fact he had permission.

Call me naive, but I think his honesty is because of my open-mindedness. I mean, is he really going to run off with a happy ending masseuse? And if he does, do I want to be married to him anyway? I'm not sure if he'll do it again, but I think the whole thing is a testament to our connection and of course, makes a great story. So, ladies -- I recommend the happy-ending-go-ahead. I've never trusted my husband more.

David Duchovny Jim Bakker


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173 comments so far | Post a comment now
Michael October 17, 2008, 1:00 PM

The sick thing is that most prostitutes in the world are horribly exploited. The image of the glamorous prostitute that we have in the west is very rare, and most women that work in places like these are forced to do so through economic reasons at best or through coercion and force at worst, and regardless of how they arrive there are almost always maltreated and abused by those that oversee them. That’s great that you and your husband are so “open” and “trusting” and are high-fiving and laughing after he got his handjob. For men, a “happy-ending” massage or a blow job or full service is just a few dollars spent and a relaxing time. The fact that it doesn’t mean anything to you or to your husband to get a cheap thrill at the hands of some poor girl who spends her entire day being degraded and exploited is pathetic. It has nothing to do with being a prude or being ‘open’ or trusting. The women’s movement used to find pornography, prostitution and the like to be degrading. However, these days, many liberated women in the West find this sort of thing empowering. Its one of the greatest coups that men have ever pulled on the feminist movement. Good luck with your marriage.

Daisy October 18, 2008, 11:38 AM

Loser! Just wait until he runs away for a permanent long term massage. Way to teach the next generation. Do you realize how many unreported diseases come from those places? Grow up, this isn’t the 70’s.

Diane October 19, 2008, 9:36 AM

Tiffany you’re right. Some people do have open marriages and are okay with it. However, I’m not sure that there have been any long term studies on how many of those marriages fail 5-10-20 years down the road. I would hazard a guess that the divorce rate is a higher than the monogamous marriages divorce rate. Which, granted, is a lot higher than it should be.

I personally know two couples who have had open marriages.

One couple did it for a couple of years, and stopped when they had their first child. I know that it was hard on both of them to stop, but after a lot of fighting, they worked through it, and are now happily monogamous.

The other one, they both thought it was great. She would bring home her girlfriends to have sex with him, and she would have sex with whoever she wanted. It wasn’t until she fell in love with one of her “flings” and she left her husband, did he realize how crazy and inappropriate it was that he was having sex with her friends, but that his own WIFE had no sexual interest in him.

I am now very happily, and very monogamously, married to the man in the second story. I will not “share him” and he will not “share me”. If we wanted to be with other people, we would have remained single.


Diane October 19, 2008, 9:36 AM

Tiffany you’re right. Some people do have open marriages and are okay with it. However, I’m not sure that there have been any long term studies on how many of those marriages fail 5-10-20 years down the road. I would hazard a guess that the divorce rate is a higher than the monogamous marriages divorce rate. Which, granted, is a lot higher than it should be.

I personally know two couples who have had open marriages.

One couple did it for a couple of years, and stopped when they had their first child. I know that it was hard on both of them to stop, but after a lot of fighting, they worked through it, and are now happily monogamous.

The other one, they both thought it was great. She would bring home her girlfriends to have sex with him, and she would have sex with whoever she wanted. It wasn’t until she fell in love with one of her “flings” and she left her husband, did he realize how crazy and inappropriate it was that he was having sex with her friends, but that his own WIFE had no sexual interest in him.

I am now very happily, and very monogamously, married to the man in the second story. I will not “share him” and he will not “share me”. If we wanted to be with other people, we would have remained single.


Gwen October 19, 2008, 11:52 AM

I would have totally supported my husband getting a “happy ending” at least one time, even though he gets plenty of them at home FROM ME. I agree, its part of the excitment, and probably more exciting for him because I gave him permission! I trust him completely to use discresion, and to not take it to the next (full service) level.

sally October 20, 2008, 1:45 PM

whats a happy ending?

Autumn October 26, 2008, 7:06 PM

I found this post through another blog. At first it wasn’t shocking but then when I realized that it was posted on a mainstream blog - not adult or sexual focused - I was shocked. Because it takes real guts for a woman in the mainstream society to say this is what I’ve done and it worked for us. To admit that the rules that society has laid out aren’t for everyone. To say, I think it is ok to explore and to venture across the forbidden line.

Ladies, by accepting that it is you “job” to sexually please your husband whenever he demands it you are making your marriage just that - a job. Sex is something you should give because you want it. Do you honestly think that HE thinks that pleasing and fulfilling you sexually is his “job” as a husband? If you do, try getting sex from him after a long day at the office in multiple meetings or any other similar hard day. He’s more likely to blow you off. But most men expect that even though you’ve been working your butt off all day long you should simply lay back and spread ‘em because he wants it now and it’s your “job”.

Make your own rules. Be a real woman and decide what you want and what is acceptable to you. And then accept the fact that it isn’t necessarily what will work for someone else and respect it.

Gnarls October 27, 2008, 11:32 PM

I think Eddie P. is dumb. Most married men who get happy endings are just too lazy or no good with the ladies.

Meanwhile, when you’re on business, the Mrs. is getting long-boned by Mandingo.

If you are going to pay for a happy ending, why not go get full-service from a college girl at the local meat mkt.?

Mimi October 28, 2008, 9:45 AM

Are you serious? How can you let other woman touch your man, One day it will hunt you down, just pray that your husband doesn’t make it a habit and then what are you going to do?! He will enjoy it more than he will enjoy you!! That is really sad… Then we wonder why man Cheat, because to me that is consider cheating ( with consent?!!) NASTY

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amature swingers November 9, 2008, 4:51 AM

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Jules November 10, 2008, 1:29 PM

I could care less about whether it’s cheating or not. It’s a handjob, whatever.
What I do have an opinion about is human sex slave trafficking. Those women, here and abroad don’t go to work every day to sexually satisfy men because they enjoy it and it’s a step up the corporate ladder. They do it because they are SLAVES. If they don’t do it, they most likely will never be seen or heard from again.
So next time you send your husband out for a “happy ending”, think about that poor woman or underage girl servicing him. Where is her happy ending?
Jules

amature swingers November 10, 2008, 8:20 PM

The days of eternally uncovering creditable estimations regarding this subject matter are finished.

heathersi November 25, 2008, 12:08 PM

I think it’s interesting that you and your friends basically pressured your husband into doing this! I’m sure he enjoyed his happy ending (with a child/woman who could’ve been sold into the sex trade) but did he do it just to please you? What will you ask him to do next?!?

Erin November 27, 2008, 10:58 AM

Hmmm, so when does she get to go for her own happy ending?

I wouldn’t want to be with a man that was okay with doing that. It’s rather pathetic in my opinion. The idea of marriage is making a bond and remaining loyal to your partner. Free passes are free passes. And while it’s not cheating, it’s not honoring the person you married or your relationship. And I sincerely doubt any of those men that went for a happy ending would be happy with wifey getting one of her own with another man.

Erin November 27, 2008, 11:08 AM

I’d like to make another comment after reading more of hte responses. I personally don’t think this is even a matter of trust. It’s a matter of respect. If so many married men are getting “happy endings” then why are these men even married to begin with? And I think these men should ask themselves if they would be happy with their wives receiving a happy ending from other men. I have yet to hear any man say he would be okay with that yet I have seen many men compliment the woman in the article for letting her husband get one. Come on guys, why don’t you try honoring and respecting your wives if you made the choice to get married. And if you want happy endings and different women, then have that. Just don’t pretend you love, respect and care for yoru woman at home. You obviously don’t if you can do something like that. And if most married men are doing this, then I am sorry but that really says something sad about married men. Not about women. I do tend to think society is going into the gutter. Even if “most” people are doing something doesn’t mean it’s cool, right or the best way to treat someone you claim you love.

Marc December 4, 2008, 3:08 PM

Many men are capable of separating sex and love. Women have a much more difficult time with this. Sex for a man can be intimate or it can be like getting a massage or brushing your teeth. Not sure what is “gross” about a handjob?

metal December 15, 2008, 10:05 PM

I would say your husband is cheating on you.. don’t think that if he tells you about the h*ndjob, he will tell you everything he does. It never stops at the h*ndjob.

And you are too stupid to know this. He must be feeling happy to have so dumb a wife. I have seen ‘open-minded’ woman like you and they always get left by their ‘loving’ man for another woman.

Everyone Listen Up December 19, 2008, 10:41 PM


1. Those of you that keep bashing: Quit degrading people by imposing your “morals” as if they should be society’s standard. While you don’t approve, it doesn’t mean that is wrong (keep reading).

2. Adults, especially married ones have the right to live life they way they choose too. What they do while being lawful should be no one’s concern.

3. While there is a lot of exploitation of women in the world, that is not to say that all woman are. You cannot fault the poster or her husband for contributing to the exploitation of woman if you do not know for sure if the woman he went to was actually being exploited. Fact is, there are many woman that do things because they like the money. Regardless, you do not have enough facts to judge or say/imply they actually help contribute to exploitation.

4. You have no right for assuming that her husband would cheat on her or eventually run off because of this. Are you are stereotyping all men for your poor luck with men in your own life? You are generalizing and stereotyping, and is borderline prejudice. Maybe you need to look at yourself more and the choices in men you make and not bash others for having a trusting relationship. You have no right to tell the poster that her husband will leave or cheat.

4. The poster will live with her decision. I am sure she has given it plenty of thought. Are you calling her stupid? Are you so egotistical to believe that what you believe is absolute? Many of the posts on here should be considered an insult by the poster.

5. Not every one has to believe in the same constitution of marriage or anything else that life offers us for that matter. If you are Christian then your vows will be those taken by the Christian doctrine(s) and be presented as such before “God”. NOT EVERYONE has to believe in the same things or what those “things” mean to them; whether it be “God”, ideals, morals, vows, trust, love, cheating….etc.

6. The poster was telling a story. Worry about your own life, do not judge others. If you don’t agree you certainly have the right to say so, but you do not have the right to assume things that have no factual basis. Nor do you have the right to slander possible situations or people and take stab at how they want to live their life, or what they believe/don’t believe in.

Evolution has spoken.


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