Guest blogger NorEastMom: Do you really have to write "Thank You" notes when you're getting barfed on every two hours, or is this a female standard we can change?
When you have a new baby, presents naturally come flooding in. Sometimes it's even hard to find that new child amidst the gift bags, tissue paper and "I Pood" T-shirts. Of course, every mom is grateful for yet another packet of face cloths -- I get it, I'm in charge of washing this human, thanks. But, sometimes it's daunting to think that you must fit in all that thank-you card writing in between the nursing, sitz baths, diaper changes and chafed nipple care.
This is exactly why my friends and I started "No Thank You" gifts for newborns. This is when you specifically state in the card, "Please do not take the time to write a thank you ... instead, do something for mommy." Fathers that read this note think it means, go for a pedicure. Moms that write the note mean: shower your inevitable stink off, change your sour milk shirt, eat some form of food, drink a fluid, or maybe even empty that bladder that has been so neglected for the past six hours. So, our group has gifted our friends with "get out of jail free" cards in this instance. And I am all for the rest of America supporting the cause.
Why can we just decide that its fair and acceptable? After all, women set the standard. Most of us recognize that our husbands do not see the necessity of writing thank you notes under any circumstance. Case in point: I witnessed this conversation one day after my husbands work buddies chipped in $200 (!) for a guy's birthday present:
Steve: Hey, thanks for that money you put on my desk last month. I bought a new tuna rod.
Steve: Tell the other guys.
Rob: No problem.
WHAT???!!! And yet here we are, newborn infant falling helplessly into our armpit, suckling for dear life, while notes and envelopes are splayed around us on the couch and we're silently weeping that all we had to eat today was a cheese stick. Ladies, we're the ones who hold each other to these standards, let's STOP THE MADNESS! If you get a chance to phone, drop an email, or send a baby pic on the computer, then you should be more than covered. Even if one of your breasts is hanging out as you accomplish this.
Etiquette maven Emily Post says that if a gift is opened in front of the donor, no thank you is necessary. Further, her guidelines state in the case of a family death or loss, as long as the person giving a condolence card specifically states, "you do not have to write me a thank you" then you're off the hook. So I'm sure the same can be said for new moms. Momlogic designed a printable "No thank you" coupon to insert in your next newborn gift. Let's start a trend! A revolution! An uprising! The next time you haven't showered or slept in six days because of your baby, you'll be snoozing instead of licking stamps.