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This Other Woman Has No Soul

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I'm offended on behalf of mothers everywhere.

Sarah Symonds

Momlogic's Julie: When we did the "Who's Sleeping with Your Husband?" series back in June, I was bothered by the women's lack of empathy for the wife and children of the men they were sleeping with. Now that we realize we have Gordon Ramsay's alleged mistress on tape, I am looking at this footage with new eyes ... and am even more disturbed.

When we interviewed Sarah this summer, I knew she was a spokeswoman for Ashley Madison (the dating site for married people - yuck) and that she often slept with high-profile married men. Her interview intrigued me because I just couldn't understand how a woman like her could sleep with a married man and NOT think about the family and the marriage she's helping to destroy. I know it takes two to tango ... obviously, the man has equal blame. But how could a woman do this to another woman?

When the news broke of chef Gordon Ramsay possibly having an affair, it was pitched in our morning meeting just like any other story. But soon, our producer Melissa made the connection ... we had interviewed Sarah Symonds for our cheating series, and had her on tape talking about her high-profile affair! All of our jaws dropped. We rushed to the editing bay to get a look at this never-before-seen footage.

Now that we know Sarah is possibly the mistress of chef Gordon Ramsay (a man I adore every week on "Kitchen Nightmares" ... I even have it on my TiVo season pass), the story she tells of her affair almost turns my stomach. When she's talking, I picture Gordon's wife, Tana, and their four kids: Megan, twins Jack and Holly, and Matilda. The family she's breaking apart now has a name and a face, and that changes everything.

She is obviously very smart and put together and articulate, so how could she do something so low?

It's very rare that we get an inside look into a very public affair ... yet, we have one now. We see how callously the other woman can speak of her part in breaking up a marriage and a family. How she says she called his wife to alert her of the affair. There seems to be no feeling or emotion in her words ... she's almost robotic. I feel more upset than she sounds ... and I've never met these people in my life!

What this has taught me is how cold and calculating other women can be if they want your man. I am thankful I have a great husband who I firmly believe would never cheat on me. I trust him completely. But I don't trust other women as much now. I just hope my husband never encounters a woman like Sarah Symonds ... because I'm sure there are thousands out there just like her, who don't give a damn about me or my family or the bond we share. In fact, she'd probably get a thrill just knowing she was "powerful" enough to destroy it. And as a woman and a mother, that literally turns my stomach.


next: They're Not Animals, They're Siblings
9 comments so far | Post a comment now
Charles Orlando November 25, 2008, 6:37 PM

I guess I’m confused at your strong reaction to The Other Woman. I ABSOLUTELY agree that she has some fault here… but it was GORDON RAMSAY that had the affair. HE is the one who promised to stay faithful and honor (and not humiliate) his wife… and he failed on both counts.

Temptation is around us all… every day. What defines us as honorable and faithful is how we respond to that temptation. A husband cheating on his wife is to blame, not The Other Woman. In my opinion, there is no such thing as a “homewrecker”… unless you’re talking about the married man (or woman) who cheated. THEY are the ones that destroyed their relationship, not the outside party.

Anonymous November 25, 2008, 7:33 PM

Sarah is not going to have any empathy b/c, to her, sleeping with another married man, is a job and possibly with some good monetary payoff. And perhaps the bigger payoff is to her ego at being able to steal another woman’s mate. This is a woman who wrote a book for “the other woman”…and while she has some good points as to preserving a relationship, she seems sociopathic with her blatent disregard for the lives she has impacted.

Anonymous November 26, 2008, 12:02 PM

Charles, isn’t that like eradicating the drug dealer from blame and stating only the drug user is at fault? C’mon there is moral behavior that benefits the community, then there is behavior that tears at the fabric of family values. He is equally if not moreso to blame, but she made it awfully easy for him to “find a hole to crawl into”…

Anonymous November 26, 2008, 2:14 PM

Preditorial mistresses are easy to spot… they have no eyebrows. They must DRAW them on (see above pic). Keep your men away from eyebrowless ladies and you’ll be fine.

Matt December 4, 2008, 3:40 PM

“Charles, isn’t that like eradicating the drug dealer from blame and stating only the drug user is at fault?”

No, it isn’t the same at all. While the drug dealer bears part of the blame for offering the illegal drugs, the person who accepts the temptation is still the one at fault for messing up his life by taking the drugs. He’s still sober before he takes them. He (or she) can say no.

Sorry. Charles is right. There is no such thing as a “homewrecker”.

A person is born with free will. The only way that can change is if said person was forced to do something by other means (say by threating that person’s life or the lives of others). Even still, you have a choice.

A woman (or man - let’s not kid ourselves here) does bear some blame for not respecting the sanctity of one’s marriage but the person who blames the aggressor for “being a homewrecker” is akin to saying that you have absolutely no responsibility for your actions and that’s not only ridiculous…it’s VERY immature thinking.

If you are legally sold a firearm, you could be tempted to rob somebody and murder them. You’ll end up in prison or, quite possibly, on Death Row or dead but it’s YOUR choice that leads to that fate. It’s not the shopowner’s fault or the company that sells you the gun, it’s YOUR fault.

The moment people wake up and realize that “homewrecker” is just some immature, made-up word to excuse the person who made the dumb choice of cheating on their spouse or g/f, the quicker society will evolve.

Madelaine December 9, 2008, 8:49 AM

Wow,Matt & Charles.For once i came accross men who does not believe in the pathetic excuses normally used by cheating spouses to “explain” infidelity.I salute you for that.For the first time a man (admit)that the cheating spouse willfully made that choice. Not only are the other woman torned to pieces, but men are projected as stupid mindless primative creatures ruled by their manhood. People tend to forget that the wife of the cheating husband who is suppose to know him very well believe his lies,trust him, but expect OW to disbelieve everything this man says. Now, how on earth can a person live a life mistrusting everything another person tells you. I, don’t want to live like that. Like you point out, its the person telling the lie not the person believing it. Thank you for your honesty. I wish there were more guys like you and Charles

Black Iris October 22, 2009, 7:37 AM

I have to say, I think there is such a thing as a “homewrecker.” Anyone who’s in an affair and hoping to break up the marriage is a homewrecker. That doesn’t absolve the cheating slime dog husband (or wife), it just blames both of them.

Nevertheless, I feel some sympathy for the woman in the tape. She fell for the guy’s lies. She thought he was in love with her not his wife. Her feelings overwhelmed her so that she didn’t really care about other people’s feelings. That’s selfish and we should all learn from it, but she’s not soulless. Besides, in the end, the guy chose his wife over her.

Black Iris October 22, 2009, 7:39 AM

I have to say, I think there is such a thing as a “homewrecker.” Anyone who’s in an affair and hoping to break up the marriage is a homewrecker. That doesn’t absolve the cheating slime dog husband (or wife), it just blames both of them.

Nevertheless, I feel some sympathy for the woman in the tape. She fell for the guy’s lies. She thought he was in love with her not his wife. Her feelings overwhelmed her so that she didn’t really care about other people’s feelings. That’s selfish and we should all learn from it, but she’s not soulless. Besides, in the end, the guy chose his wife over her.

Black Iris October 22, 2009, 7:50 AM

I have to say, I think there is such a thing as a “homewrecker.” Anyone who’s in an affair and hoping to break up the marriage is a homewrecker. That doesn’t absolve the cheating slime dog husband (or wife), it just blames both of them.

Nevertheless, I feel some sympathy for the woman in the tape. She fell for the guy’s lies. She thought he was in love with her not his wife. Her feelings overwhelmed her so that she didn’t really care about other people’s feelings. That’s selfish and we should all learn from it, but she’s not soulless. Besides, in the end, the guy chose his wife over her.


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