I Can Relate to Casey Anthony

I Can Relate to Casey Anthony

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Guest Blogger Frazzled Mama: Sometimes I think accused mom Casey Anthony and I have something in common.

I'll let you in on a secret: When I see those pictures of Casey Anthony out partying the days after her child had gone missing, I empathize with her. That look on her face is that of a woman who -- in a fit of desperation -- may have chosen to sedate her own child for a couple hours of freedom. And then something went terribly wrong.

As a mom trying to balance work, family and sanity, there are times when I want nothing more than to go back to my free and single days with no responsibly to anyone but myself. I truly know how she feels. But unlike what Casey may have done, I would never harm my child to make that dream come true. I love my daughter more than I ever thought possible. But if any of us were to be honest with ourselves, can any mother say they are 100% happy being a mother 100% of the time?

There are days when we moms, especially those with young children, are so worn out, so tired, so frustrated that we wish our kids would just go away. That we could just snap our fingers and Poof! they'd disappear. Usually, for the most part, these feelings pass and we're yanked back into reality by a toddler hug or a smile or just a deep breath -- suddenly everything is worthwhile. Sadly, women like Casey Anthony don't snap back and they do the unthinkable. I know for myself there are times--rarely--when I think if I had it to do all over again maybe having children wasn't the best choice for me.

Of course we're never supposed to even admit anything like that. Mothers are supposed to be selfless creatures living only for their children. Sacrificing everything for family. With that lofty expectation of motherhood, no wonder mothers are prone to depression, self-doubt, huge amounts of crushing guilt and despite it all there are of course moments of incredible joy.

Are you ALWAYS glad to be a mother?

326 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

Moms needs time away and then can come back a better Mom. My time away is a once a month dinner with my friends and lunch/shopping days. Once you become a Mom, your priorities change, they have to, actually I think it is so rewarding and yes stressful at times, but, well worth it. Even an animal takes care of their own!

- Pam

Posted 11/18/08 10:32 PM

I am divorced mother of 3. I had my first child when I was 20. Yes, there are times when I miss the freedom and the ‘party scene’, which is why from time to time I hire a babysitter or go out when my children are at their dad’s house. I have a full time job and come home to clean and cook, do homework and bath times and laundry and read bedtime stories. My youngest is 3 years old and she can be high maintenance BUT I never wish I could snap my fingers and make them dissapear. I do with they were more independent or that the oldest two would clean their rooms more often. NEVER wish or dream or not having them around. So no, I can’t relate to this woman nor the blogger. I am 100% happy to be a mom 100% of the time. I might not like all the chores and extra work 100% of the time, and that’s when I take a day off and just spend it playing games with the kids. Want to party? Hire a (real) babysitter or trade babysitting favors with other moms. That, is common sense.

- AmyLately

Posted 11/19/08 10:48 AM

If Casey Anthony drugged her sweet child just to go out partying SHAME! Unfortunately, sedation may be more common than the average person likes to think. Back when my son was teething and crying all night an elderly sweet church lady told me that when her kids were small she would rub WHISKEY on their gums to put them to sleep. Needless to say I was horrified, and no, I did NOT do any such thing to my son. But I guess this shows all of this sort of thing does happen

- Alice

Posted 11/19/08 03:26 PM

I would NEVER sedate my son to go out partying no matter how despesperate I may get.

- Anonymous

Posted 11/19/08 03:34 PM

On my worst days, my daughter is a source of comfort and inspiration. SHE is the very thing I NEED on my worst days. Perhaps there is some resentment you are holding against your child? Instead of hiding these feelings and hoping they’ll go away, I strongly suggest getting help processing them. STAT.

- DD

Posted 11/20/08 12:32 PM

I just cannot belive this post, I have read most of the responses and I am not even sure how to respond. I hope for your childs well being that you get help with your empathetic feelings for Casey. Everything about this case makes me sick every night. I love my children more than anything in this world and would never wish for anything different.EVER!!!

- ray

Posted 11/20/08 09:31 PM

- ray

Posted 11/20/08 09:31 PM

I understand what you are saying, but this definitely was in poor taste. If anyhing this story should make everyone realize how precious their children are, not how they can relate to Casey Anthony. However, I don’t think casey intentionally killed Caylee. I think something accidental happened, still no excuse though.

- Melanie

Posted 11/21/08 07:38 AM

Emphasizing with Casey at the time she was out partying and not grieving or caring about her dead or missing daughter is pretty bizarre.

- Lacey

Posted 11/21/08 07:42 AM

The bottom line is that Casey Anthony is a sociopath. She fits the description right on. She has no conscience- and that is something normal people can’t relate too. She doesn’t have the ability to love, feel remorse, anything, feel ashamed of herself, anything. She doesn’t have the ability to care about anyone but yourself. I’m reading the book The Sociopath Next Door and it’s fascinating.

- Laura

Posted 11/21/08 07:46 AM

I do empathize. You can’t criminalize a fleeting thought or feeling. It’s the action and the inability to control your actions, rationalize through the crazy, brief thought that is criminal, sinister, and wrong. I love your post and feel so proud that someone actually said it!!

- Ellen

Posted 11/21/08 11:01 AM

Mothers have been overwhelmed for all of history. Casey needs to come clean, and face the music. Caylee deserves a proper burial, so she can rest in peace.

- Cindy

Posted 11/24/08 08:44 PM

I think people are blowing this post way out of proportion. The writer is clearly saying that she would never do what Casey Anthony may have done to her daughter. She is saying that as a mother, there are moments when she wishes for peace or the simplicity of her single and carefree life, however, if given the choice to “undo” her current life and go back to being single, she would never chose to have not had her child. As an adoptive mother, there are definite moments where I wonder why I chose this…those hard, difficult moments when I am dealing with a difficult child and for a fleeting moment I miss life the way it was before they came along. Would I trade them for anything? Nope, but there are moments when I think I might; when my imagination allows me to go back in time. Some women are just born to be moms…I know this and have friends who are amazing mothers. I have to work at it every single day; I am not a natural. But whether you are a natural or not, I believe that every mother has those moments of just desperately wanting a handful of hours to herself. Thankfully, the majority of us would not do what Casey is being accused of. That’s all the author is saying.

- Kimberly

Posted 11/26/08 09:29 AM

Freedom?I dont think you have heard or read most of the reports of Casey .I think she had more freedom than most mothers.As for working a job she lied about working-she had no job to be worn out,stressed being a working mother is not the case here-her job was text messaging and stealing money from ,friends,family yes even a grandfathers(that had a stroke (Nursing home account money)BTW that is as low as one can go.. this is like comparing a afternoon shower to a hurricane IMHO-If you can relate to her i think you might want to go get some help!!Casey is not normal mother that is stressed and wants a little “me time” she is a sick person!!

- colletta

Posted 11/27/08 03:11 AM

What?!? How can you NOT agree with the author on this topic ladies??? Wow, what complete lack of higher-order thinking processes do these women have who had the audacity to mention they disagree with the author??? I completely agree with everything mentioned in the article - as a matter of fact, I could’ve written it all word-for-word. Yes, children are a blessing and havign them comes with all these beautiful perks, yada yada yada… But, in reality can one honestly say that they have not looked in the mirror and stated to themselves, “Wow, today would be a great day to just be alone and not have to worry about anyone but myself?” Come on ladies - this is a thought,(albeit one “society” shuns on) that we all have had on numerous occassions. I for one agree with the part where she mentioned about snapping the fingers and poof!… I will admit these thoughts have invaded my mind many many times in the past, as I am sure they will again find their way back in there in the very near future. Preach on sister, I hear you and support you!

- - anna

Posted 11/27/08 06:11 PM

this is all true but you forgot that Casey didnt do all the work a mother is sopost to do, her own brother said casey would play with caylee and thats about it the grandparents are the ones who clothed fed changed diapers held her when she cried and casey only was there when she felt like it! so casey was absolutly not warn out or tired from being a mother, you must be confused b/c she was tired from drinking all night then of course puking up all the alchohal must have taken a huge strain on her, please casey was anything but a mother and comeing from a mother who has two beautiful kids that i would do anything for I have never once looked back and said honestly i regret my kids, yes i get tired and want to scream alot but i decided to have my babies and be a mother b/c i wanted to, and I took care of them everyday with no help, staying up night after night and to me it was all worth it, so yes i am always glad to be a mommy and yes my kids drive me crazy sometimes, there kids! there doing there job! casey had no feelings towards her daughter whitch I can never understand why, I look at that baby and I cant believe this, how can you look at that inisit face and hurt her?

- staci

Posted 12/03/08 03:44 AM

PERSONALLY I CAN HONESTLY SAY THAT I DID ALL THE PARTYING I WANTED TO BEFORE I DECIDED TO HAVE CHILDREN,SECONDLYI AM THE MOTHER OF A 19 YR OLD AND A 12 YR OLD AND I GOT NEWS FOR YOU IF MY OLDER CHILD GOES OUT AND I DON’T HEAR FROM HIM IN 24 HRS I AM CALLING THE POLICE! AND I HAVE DONE IT. SO HOW ANY “GOOD MOTHER” CAN WAIT MORE THEN THAT BEFORE SHE THINKS SOMETHING’S WRONG OR THAT SHE THINKS SHE CAN FIND HER ON HER OWN IS FULL OF S—- AND MY THEY SEEK THE DEATH PENALITY ON HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Anonymous

Posted 12/03/08 12:24 PM

I think a lot of people can say they are happy being a mother 100% of the time, at least I can! I may get tired, or frustrated but that has nothing to do with my job title(Mom). Sure we all need “me” time but I’m sure there are moments when are kids would like us to get lost too so they can have some “me” time also. I have never regreted not being able to have my old life back so I could have time to myself. I love every single second of being a mom and I am proud to say so.

- Sara

Posted 12/03/08 09:49 PM

You are a sick sick person. No mother in her right mind would ever want to rid of their children. Your post was interesting-see you in court to prosecute you for murdering YOUR CHILD!!

- Soon to be-Prosecuting Attorney

Posted 12/05/08 05:53 PM

I can relate ALOT to Casey Anthony. My family is ALOT like the Anthonys…and My Mother & I have a relationship identical to Casey/Cindy. I am actually a Casey Supporter.

- Rachel

Posted 12/08/08 01:25 PM