Ivanka Trump Is Converting for Love. Would You?

Ivanka Trump Is Converting for Love. Would You?

Monday, November 3, 2008

filed under: sherre hirsch

There are a million things you would do for love. Is giving up your religion one of them?

Charlotte did it for Harry on "Sex and the City," and last week we told you how Ivanka Trump is converting to Judaism so she can marry her boyfriend, Jared Kushner, the orthodox Jewish publisher of the New York Observer. While Ivanka's decision is making headlines, she's not the only one embracing Judaism for the sake of the man she loves. Rabbi Sherre Hirsch, momlogic contributor and author of "We Plan and God Laughs" explains what's involved, what it means and what you might not have thought about ... until now.

The facts are fairly straightforward. Rabbi Hirsch says it takes at least a year of study for a conversion to Judaism to be complete. "A woman goes through mikvah, which is a ritual emersion into a body of water. She also has to appear before the beit din, which is a Jewish court of law. As for a male converting, he will need to be circumcised if he already isn't." And as all "Sex And The City" addicts know from watching Charlotte have that door slammed in her face when she went to visit the Rabbi, a person who wants to convert is refused three times before they are accepted. Rabbi Hirsch explains why, "You have to show a powerful commitment to Judaism before you can convert." But the year of study needed for conversion isn't spent just hitting the books. "The year is spent living Judaism -- living with the faith and the practices, observing the holidays -- action is as important as belief in Judaism."

Rabbi Hirsch also adds, "Some people think you should convert only if you truly believe in Judaism. I don't believe that. We do all kinds of things for love. I think it's empowering to do this for another person, for the sake of raising your children and for yourself. To convert your identity or religion for someone is really a symbol of love. This is not just for the sake of the children -- this is for the sake of the marriage. If it were just for the sake of the children, that is too much of a burden on them. What Ivanka is doing is an incredible statement of love."

But the rabbi is quick to add that conversion can be a deal breaker. "If this is an ultimatum, then this is a relationship that needs to be reassessed." But while this can be a beautiful way to unify a couple, there are some sacrifices involved. So listen up Ivanka, Rabbi Hirsh says there are a few things converts often miss. "They miss the holidays like Christmas. They even miss things like cheeseburgers and BLT's if they decide to keep kosher."

How about you? Would you change your religion for the one you love?

7 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

When my husband and I got married, I convert from Catholic to Lutheran. Not as big as a reach to Judaism but I see nothing wrong with her doing that. I wanted my kids to be raised with one religion and sharing in our joint beliefs. I have no problem with them converting later in life if they so chose to.

- Anonymous

Posted 11/03/08 02:30 PM

If you’re willing to convert to a different religion, what does that say about how important your religious values are to you? If your relationship with a person is more important that your relationship with God, what kind of message does that send about you as a person? Obviously, religion isn’t important to you, and so the switch doesn’t really come as such a huge sacrifice because how committed will you be to this new religion? Anon, being Catholic and being Lutheran are both forms of the same religion - Christianity. Denomonational changes are completely different from religious conversions. I can understand wanting to raise children in a home that follows one religion, but wouldn’t you want to choose a mate whose religion aligns with your own instead of asking them to change for you?

- Kate

Posted 11/03/08 02:52 PM

From Christianity to Judaism? Personally I never think it’s a good idea to renounce Jesus as the messiah… but the Jews are God’s people.. I think she should pray and follow her heart. Woo boy this topic’s gonna open a big can o worms…

- She

Posted 11/03/08 04:36 PM

Rabbi Hirsch is obviously a Reform Rabbi. Conservative and Orthodox Rabbis would never encourage conversions for marriage only. In Orthodox Judaism, what Ivanka is reportedly going through, a conversion for the purpose of marriage is not accepted and conversions usually last at least two years. I really don’t see Ivanka going through with it. Ivanka has to change the way she dresses, eats, and she has to observe the Sabbath which will definately affect her job which requires constant travelng. I think it’s absolutely ridicoulous for anyone to pressure their partner to change their religion before marriage. Obvioulsy Ivanka wasn’t Jewish when Jared started dating her so why is it a requirement now? Jared should convert to Christianity because he disrespected his strict religious ubringing by dating a non-Jew. In fact Jared broke-up with Ivanka in April because she refused to convert at that time. Ivanka is being pressured into something she doesn’t really want to do.

- Marisa

Posted 11/03/08 08:57 PM

This converting for love really struck me because I have just had a novel released that’s close in hand about lying for love. My novel is a must-read for Ivanka! Called, THE SHIKSA SYNDROME, it’s about a Jewish girl who pretends to be a shiksa to catch a Jewish guy. My book, in the end, comes down to love that’s managed with one own’s authenticity. Take a look: www.lauriegraff.com

- Laurie Graff

Posted 11/15/08 08:38 PM

Religion couldn’t have been too important to either one of them, really. If it was in fact the leading force in their life, then they wouldn’t have been dating outside their religion, right? Wonder if the guy’s mother is behind this al???? hmmm—an intervening Jewish mother?

- Kris

Posted 01/27/09 11:37 AM

What….no way…she married him for his money.

- Anonymous

Posted 10/26/09 03:22 PM