They're Not Animals, They're Siblings

They're Not Animals, They're Siblings

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

filed under: family

Siblings fight. It's one of those unavoidable things, like death and taxes. So if you're a parent of one kid, remember this: don't judge because God will punish you with another child.

Momlogic's Jackie: "That's MY bike... get off" is usually followed with someone pushing and the other crying. And when the words "me first" are uttered, you know it's not going to end well. When you're the parent of multiple children, your job as nurturer is replaced with a position as referee.

I have three kids. Pushing, shoving, screaming and crying are commonplace in this house. Sometimes I yell, sometimes I quietly pick them up and drop them into their respective beds, and sometimes I just remember back to when I was growing up and realize that it's totally normal. (Hello, I'm one of thirteen kids -- fighting happened as often as breathing.)

But sometimes, when I'm around someone who only has one child and my kids act up a bit, the look on their face bounces back and forth between "what awful little people'" and "I feel bad for her. She really can't control her kids."

But what those parents don't see: My kids also share, hug, giggle, high-five (spontaneously), invite each other to join them in play, hold hands and love each other like crazy. It's the trade off. I believe the word sibling is actually defined as "the best of friends and worst of enemies."

So the next time you get critical, watching one of my kids push the other down on the playground, know that two minutes later, they'll be pushing each other on the swings. Because that's the way siblings roll.

7 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

Here Here!! I’d say all moms would agree, (except for moms who have only one child) that’s a totally different story… As soon I read your twit, I knew I’d like this post. I have two boys and this is the story of my life. I found this awesome quote, that I framed and put on the wall. Thought you’d enjoy it: “I told him if he kept being mean to his brother he might come back as a rodent in his next life, he shrugged and said that’s the chance he’d have to take.” I laugh every time I read it… Great post! Thanks for sharing

- Monica Borden

Posted 11/25/08 04:45 PM

Works that way in my house too! I would think something was wrong if my kids didn’t fight part of the time.

- Anne

Posted 11/25/08 04:47 PM

and isnt it so worth the fights when they do share a cuddle, uor daughters 2 and sons 4 months and shes just started saying hes her best friend oooh its sooo cute

- gemma

Posted 11/25/08 04:49 PM

ugh I am SO SO glad you wrote this!! I hate those awful stares I get from one child families!!! my boys fight hard and they love hard! dont judge unless you have been in my shoes!

- jenn

Posted 11/25/08 04:59 PM

Not all only children parents stare at multiple children like that! A lot of only children parents grew up with siblings. We know what its like to have those stupid sibling fights.

- joyce

Posted 11/26/08 01:36 PM

Thank you joyce! We are an only child family right now and I am one of 8 kids. The fights and having to do without individual attention in a large family is something I am not giving my child. Oh, and we do not stare at multiple children like that.

- just sayin'

Posted 11/26/08 08:12 PM

It is the same thing when your own Mother was an only child and you and your sibling fight, she never used to understand that we are supposed to fight. My dad who was one of 4 got that. It is just that my mom never had to share or argue with anyone her whole life-well until she got married.

- Kristen

Posted 02/27/09 06:28 PM