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X-Rated Flicks Pump Up the Passion

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One mom explains how porn can save your marriage.

man and woman in bed with tv on

Guest blogger Karrine Steffans: Last week, I told you how to make his fantasies come to life. Now it's time to kick it up a notch.

I know for some of you this will be the most difficult thing you've done since the first (and possibly last) time you tried a bikini wax. But hold tight, girlfriends, because what I'm about to tell you could possibly save your relationship.

First stop, porn!

Everyone has fantasies. Maybe yours is simply a day away from the children or tripping your mother-in-law down the steps. For men, however, fantasies most likely include sex. Men need variety and for you to use your imagination ... but when all you do is talk about the kids or how tired and stressed you always are, you sort of disqualify yourself from having the starring role in his fantasy. And your replacement? "Sluts with Butts #73."

I know. You want to vomit just thinking about it.

But the solution to this obstacle is simple. Associate yourself with the fantasy!

1. Slip into bed naked with your mate or in a highly provocative, slightly slutty get-up and pop in "Sluts with Butts #73."

2. As he turns on, get him off.

3. No need to try and compete with Miss Pussy Willow on the screen. He'll never meet her and even if he did, she wouldn't want him. Your only competition is yourself.

4. To really turn it up, record yourself in the act and make a new set of porn for your hubby to enjoy starring the both of you. If for no other reason, he'll watch just to see how he performed!

Don't quit on me now, girls! There's so much more to learn and do in the final and third part of our Strippers and Porn series. Stay tuned!

next: Wasted Youth: Freshmen Girls Beware
107 comments so far | Post a comment now
Michelle December 16, 2008, 8:02 PM

Myra, Carrie, Krystin, you guys would be absolutely correct if we were in relationships with women. Men think differently.

I don’t wanna be Pam Anderson but her “home porn tape” is still the best selling DVD in history. Karrine knows what men want.

Take the advice, augment it for your own life and keep it moving girls.

How could watching porn with your husband give you low self esteem? He’s laying in your bed not Jenna Jamison’s. Your the mother of his children not Mary Carey and believe me, he already knows where your stretch marks are. Get over it.

Natalya December 16, 2008, 8:06 PM

What’s up with all the frigid married women in here? That’s why you’re on a forum looking for sex advice from OTHER frigid wives? Come on ladies…stop judging because I’m sure ALL of you have your skeletons…all your mistakes …seriously, go fix your OWN life and stop acting like you know what’s up with HER life.

As far as advice for your marriage…i mean that’s up to you what advice you take. You all should be grown enough to figure it out if you thought you were grown enough to get married.

Porn is GREAT! And I guarantee that your husbands look at it. If you really believe your husband is as frigid as you all are, you’re all in denial. That’s why prostitutes are still in business. It’s not always about YOU!!!

TwitGuy December 16, 2008, 8:06 PM

Actually, if you follow Karrine’s life and actually talk to her on, and not just listen to bitter, hateful women, you’d know that she’s been married and is married now.

She doesn’t talk too much about her personal life but if you also tune into her video blogs at, you can see it seems she’s gonna be a mommy again. But she has never said anything about it, so I can’t be sure.

Some people have an idea who her other half is but, like I said, she doesn’t discuss her personal life and he’s famous too so they just say a whole lot of nothing about it.

As for the advice, I think it’s better to join in the fun rather than beat your man up about his fantasies. That’s why so many men cheat and why the divorce rate is so high!

Karrine should know what married men want since she has been and is married and had been a mistress after her first marriage and, being a married man, I can only imagine what men tell their lovers on the side about their boring, fat, tired, missionary style wives.

Yuck! Who wants that!

These angry women are the ones who are being cheated on with a women as sexy, open minded, and vivacious as Karrine.

It’s sad some men have to sneak around to do these sorts of things b/c their wives are callused ice queens with granny panties and hairy nipples. Women who don’t work out or wax, women who have no idea what men really need. Women who think that just b/c they married a man, they know how to please him for the rest of their lives.

You women are so naive.

So many women have let themselves go and can’t even see it! Atleast this woman is hot and seems to understand what men need! In return, she knows what women need to do for their men!

Either way, I agree with joining in instead of nagging your man. We hate nags and from the responses here, most of you women are definitely NAGS!

Patricia December 16, 2008, 8:20 PM

Honey, I wished I knew that my ex-husband was addicked to XXX movies, XXX magazines, printing tons of spread eagle women off the intern. He couldn’t wait till I was out of the house to jack off like a monkey. I would have been doing this instead of going to my evil mother-in-law and her relative’s houses. My holidays were ruined just by being near his relatives. When I wanted to be addicked to all this XXX stuff; instead of Wife-of-the-Year and Mother-of-the-Year; my ex-husband became violent. Guys want to be scum; but they won’t let you. Screw that and their %^&$ing double standard. Porn addiction opened my eyes and made me realize why my marriage was garbage. A guy likes porn and strippers, because he doesn’t want to look at your body. He actually can’t stand the sight of your non-perfect body. He only wants to focus on those perfect 18-21 year old big breasted, tight booty actresses. He is fantasizing that he is doing those whores. That is why he will go out of his way to find XXX stores or open his wallet wide. That is why; he will lie, lie, lie. That is why; he tries so hard not to let you find out what he is doing. He knows that if you realize what he is all about; he will have to confront his mental illness. has a good article on porn addiction and it is like cocaine addiction. They need more and more. Health insurance covers porn addiction. A guy who brings porn into the house or goes to strip joints, DOESN’T love or like you. He is using your holes.

Chad December 16, 2008, 8:41 PM

LADIES, LADIES! This is absolutely the TRUTH what Karrine is saying. I have been married for 7 years. And my wife and I have come up with many different ways to spice our marriage and sex life. She was the one who came to me with the porn watching while we have sex. And I have to tell you. It is totally AWESOME!!!! At first I thought maybe it was some kind of scheme to make me confess I watch porn. But when I looked in her bag. I noticed lots of great porn. I was totally shocked and happy. I told my friends about it and they all confirmed I am the man. Their wives became lame and boring after marriage. Sex became an obligation and not a desire. They weren’t to happy anymore. This is totally the best way to keep your man guessing, excited, and wanting to continue passion with you. It has worked great for me and my wife. My wife read this blog and is so looking forward to your new book Karrine! Thanks

GettingLei'd December 16, 2008, 8:41 PM

LOL@ those of you offended and enraged by this advice. No wonder you’re not getting regularly and thoroughly piped!

Bow Wow Lady December 16, 2008, 8:43 PM

Superhead is crazy, she can’t even keep a man and yet she continues to offer some sort of advice. Well, the chick needs to advise herself on the matter of keeping her mouth and her legs closed. She is a walking STD. She doesn’t have money like she says she does, and on top of that, every man she sleeps with leaves her for another woman. She likes attention, even if it is bad attention. This heifer did all that damn sucking and still ended up homeless. No wonder men don’t do anything for her, she is just a sideline hoe. Dudes just sleep with her to say they have hit it. I feel bad for her son. Poor child will be teased for ages. And Bow Wow is still here in Atlanta doing his thing and talking about her like she is some pissed on dirt!

Lolola December 16, 2008, 8:43 PM


Sounds like you just got an unhealthy man.

The majority of men enjoy porn and like to look at it, but aren’t addicted to it.

There is nothing wrong with brining it into your bedroom.

Low self esteem will be your downfall. You will choose another unhealthy man, because your esteem is low.

Patricia December 16, 2008, 8:45 PM

TwitGuy, you are probably the reason the porn industry and strip clubs are still in business. You are probably unattractive, uneducated and insecure. You probably can’t cook, do laundry, grocery shop, or clean. The place you live in is probably filthy. You probably have such severe character flaws; that you’ve never had a woman or a man. If someone can stand to be married to you; they deserve a purple heart or noble peace prize.

Anthony Taurus December 16, 2008, 8:45 PM

As a man, I have to say that Karrine is 100% right. That’s all I will say to the piece itself. However, to you women who don’t appreciate the information given, I have to wonder, WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH YOU? Why do you want to get the man and not want to keep the man? Why do I end up with these kind of prudish and/or jealous women? If you want to keep me around, give me a better reason to stay other than what you’ve done. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE FOR ME LATELY? And watch Food Network. Cooking is not buying fried chicken from Habibi and making mac and cheese. Then you wonder why I won’t commit. WTF AM I COMMITTING TO?

Nikki December 16, 2008, 8:45 PM

Thanks Bow Wow Lady…I could not have said it any better myself!!! A Single woman (groupie) giving advice to married men, hilarious.

Are you serious? December 16, 2008, 8:52 PM

So many women thinking that the only connection they can have with a man is through sex. Men want it and we’ve been having successful marriaged before Karrine was even thought of. I am not here to bash her but I think she is not the right person to give marital advice on sex. She cant tell us how to keep a man and most women know that anytime a female will let a some man stick something in them for a quick feeling they will do it. They come back because they can, there is no promise of matrimony or even monogamy. I dont care whatshe does in her personal life but she cant tell me how to do my husband. Its more like THE NERVE OF HER that has women upset. She is not a threat to me and a lot of men wouldnt touch her but of course they may fantasize about a woman that would let them do any and everything to them. I feel that its pretty balsy to write about a topic that you nothing about. I think if she wrote a book about being a mistress it would receive less controversy but to write about keeping a man is rather interesting. Im waiting for the man to come forward and say that this is my “Wife” that would give her some grounds to speak.

MaleModel December 16, 2008, 8:56 PM

What you women don’t seem to understand. Is that this advice could save your marriage. The number reason why men don’t commit to marriage is that we are afraid of a BAD MARRIAGE. And a bad marriage is the one where your wife turns into you mother. starts acting like her and looks like her. Now who the hell wants to stay married to that? I’m not saying work out everyday ladies. But damn don’t become clone of my old nagging mom who isn’t sexy.

Patricia December 16, 2008, 9:01 PM

Lolola, I do not have low self esteem. My self esteem is so high; because my eyes are open wide.

Phoenix December 16, 2008, 9:05 PM

Yeah, Let him film you, Stupid, so when u divorce he get custody of yo kids !!!

Zito December 16, 2008, 9:09 PM

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with bringing some spice to the bedroom. Yeah it may not be for everyone, and nobody should be forced to watch porn, but personally i think its a good way to add some variety.

Nikki December 16, 2008, 9:11 PM

Your husband is so embarrassed by you (if you even have a husband) that he doesn’t want anyone to know that he’s married to you…..yet YOU are trying to give some marriage advice? Let me give you some advice, love yourself, and your son and your ‘husband’ be a mom and a ‘wife’ OUT OF THE SPOTLIGHT for a few years, THEN come back and try it again. It just might work.

mdsteelergal December 16, 2008, 9:25 PM

I totally don’t get how the ‘woman’ is always at fault. All the judgmental things you all have to say, are about how Karrine could be a woman who did this and that. Who the hell did she do it with? Is it her fault that your husband decided to cheat? While her agreeing to enter into such an encounter may have been a mistake, who hasn’t made a mistake? I, myself am still working on sins from the year 2000. And I know many of you that judge could write a book or two yourselves. Just because Karrine laid her mess bare, she is never to grow? Never to change? Wow, you people are pieces of work! I am a married woman of 10 yrs with 4 kids, and I’m a size 4. Let me tell you, if you don’t - someone will. Take the time to spice things up. I have never let myself go, love myself too much! Fantasies are something both sexes have. Don’t kid yourself into thinking it wouldn’t please him, it would! Enjoy a movie in moderation. Anything in excess is a sin. Karrine and anyone else can change! The fact that you all want advice means you need help in the first place. Name calling is just juvenille. We all had nicknames at one time or another, just because hers possibly symbolizes something YOUR hubby would like, something you aren’t giving — Don’t Hate!

Are you serious? December 16, 2008, 9:31 PM

Im just waiting patiently for her 15 minutes to be up cuz she keeps stretching it out but screwing some more celebs. What losers follow her?? if “superhead” is your role model maybe you should re-evalute your standards. GOD help us all

Jean December 16, 2008, 9:38 PM

I dont know about YOUR husband Mdsteelergal but mine thinks that she has bugs and he doesn’t want her he wouldn’t even look at that vid with her and mr. marcus. He said he hate to see a man go down like that. He’s still disgusted at her for putting her sons face in her first book. With that said this can be very useful advice for women who ‘need’ it. I just wish that Karrine would allow her actions to go along with her words. I mean she is trying to change her image…right? So why if she was a lil ‘friendly’ in her hay days, why would she blog about sex? Why? That’s not changing your image…you only do that if you still want to make money off your past. She claims to have a husband and she wants to be a soccer mom and wife so she should go be that. Do some seminars on self esteem for younger girls or something. Stop writing tell alls and sex anythings! If you want to change your image, do something that doesn’t have to deal with sex.

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