"I lost my Wall Street job two months ago and have since been unable to find work. I brought in a substantial part of our household income and Jennifer (my supposed BFF) knew that. I am basically freaking out and wondering how my family is going to continue to make ends meet -- and Jennifer, while she does ask how I am doing and takes an interest in my job search, keeps telling me about her purchases (shoes and clothes and extravagant holiday gifts for her kids) and her upcoming holiday trip. I think she is being an insensitive jerk, but I am afraid if I say something, I will be the one that sounds jealous. As we say in New York, "Whaddya think?" Signed "Wall Street Wannabee"
Leslie Adler: I rule in favor of you Wall Street Wannabee, but I don't think that this is a punishable offense. Jennifer is being an insensitive jerk, but I am assuming, if she truly is your BFF, that she is acting without malice (if you don't believe that to be true, then you need a new friend!). Maybe Jennifer doesn't understand the gravity of your situation and is just going on as if it were "business as usual." My advice ... tell her the truth. I know, it's a radical idea, but it works. You should be able to tell a BFF that the loss of your job is causing you much anxiety and that even though you are happy that the state of our economy is not negatively impacting her, when she talks about purchases and vacations you cannot currently afford, she is stressing you out. A true BFF will understand. Here's hoping you find a job soon and thanks for Telling It To The Vuv at The Friendship Court!!