When Tamra from "The Real Housewives of Orange County" blamed Gretchen's need for attention on her not being breastfed, this mom found it insulting to her and her baby.
Guest blogger Maria: I've read the studies and I've heard the arguments for breast-feeding. I respect peoples' choice to breast-feed their children. I think it's a wonderful option for some mothers -- they enjoy it, their kids enjoy it, and all is well in their family. I think whatever works FOR YOU is the best way to go.
I think that many women, however, breast-feed because there is pressure put on them by their husbands, their mothers-in-law, their peers, the media and themselves. I personally think the studies play upon people's fears and are designed to keep women out of the workplace. When Tamra implied that Gretchen is an attention whore because "maybe she wasn't breast-fed" she added to this growing trend of speaking down to women who don't breast-feed. In this case, she also insulted the children of moms who don't breast-feed. And by the way, I'd like to see the "study" that says this is true.
Tamra is not the only one who adds to the problem. About a year ago, I was part of a conversation about a teenager who killed his parents. One mom joked, "Maybe he wasn't breast-fed." Right. Not breast-feeding will turn your kid into a murderer -- a murderer of you.
I'm also sick of the argument that it's selfish not to breast-feed. I know some women who were tortured when they were breast-feeding. Their nipples were bleeding, they didn't know how much milk their child was getting and their husbands were either completely shut out of the process or verbally abused for no other reason than their lack of ability to share the responsibility. Isn't it more selfish to stick to something that's not working for anyone on principle? Isn't it important for a baby to be around stress-free, happy people who are able to function properly?
As the trend in the '70s was NOT TO breast feed, it is now TO breast feed. So, I'm opting to ignore the trends and do what's best for me and my family. I'd also like to tell the usually wonderful Tamra to think before she speaks -- maybe someone should stick a breast in her mouth to shut her up. She needs to stop insulting me AND my baby.