twitter facebook stumble upon rss

Parents Crashed My Kid's Party!

sign up for the momlogic newsletter Tweet This

Guest blogger Gina: My seven-year-old recently invited 10 friends to her birthday party (held at our house), but 20 people showed up! Who were the party crashers? The guests' parents!

Woman pulling her hair in a party

I understand that it is appropriate and even necessary for parents to accompany their child to play dates and parties when he/she has needs that require special attention (like not being able to use the bathroom on one's own, for example), but somehow I missed the memo that says that parents must accompany their school-aged children everywhere. Somehow I was under the impression that a child who goes to school from 9 to 3 by herself was able to play Pin the Tail on the Donkey without her mom's supervision.

If safety is the issue, or your child only feels comfortable being at a friend's house when you are there, then do the courteous thing and LET ME KNOW AHEAD OF TIME THAT YOU'RE PLANNING TO STAY. That way, I won't run out of food (that you say you're not interested in eating but do anyway).

However, next time, if you don't absolutely need to be there, then please don't come. Besides being a burden on me, your presence is also distracting and annoying for the kids.

School-aged children want to be independent, but it's hard to feel that way when your mom is cutting your pizza.


next: Alcohol Can Improve Your Man's Performance in Bed!
12 comments so far | Post a comment now
Beth January 27, 2009, 3:12 PM

i so agree.
i’ve had parents stay for a 12 yr old’s party.
it’s rude!

Dionne January 27, 2009, 4:39 PM

Yeah I think the parents should get a life. Go do something else for a couple hours.

kerri January 27, 2009, 5:00 PM

sorry, but if you want the parents to drop the kids off, you need to say so in the invites, especially at seven. (presumably some of the party-goers were still six years old). Sure they are in school all day, but in school there is a teacher and a clearly defined and understood structure. Their teacher also deals with a group of six and seven year olds day in and day out, and is not concerned with supervising a group of 11 young kids while also juggling the demands of a party and emotions of an easily distraught birthday child.
I would think at that age you would welcome the extra help.

Suzette January 27, 2009, 5:12 PM

I’m assuming Kerri must be one of those parents who feel their “extra help” is always appreciated. However, many of us read that as being “over-protective.” Let the kids have fun without you and without teachers for a bit. If you’re that panicked over leaving your darling with an unknown adult (and a bunch of their classmates!) for a couple of hours, respectfully decline the invitation. You are being a burden on the host. If you want to stay, ASK, don’t assume!

Trisha January 27, 2009, 5:47 PM

Kerri I completly agree with you. Really to the mom who wants to have a party full of games, food and sugar. Have you ever thrown a party for your child before. Personally I think its nice to have them there. I dont want to have to babysit on top of entertain a group of 10 seven year olds. Its already stressful enough. I do draw the line at 12.

Wendi January 27, 2009, 7:46 PM

I think that a parent should stay with kids that age, especially if you don’t know the parents giving the party really well. I would NEVER just leave my kids at a house that I have not gone in and met the parents and spent time with them. You just don’t know how other people run their houses. I do not think that a kid should be left out because you don’t want a parent there. That is just crazy. I have thrown many parties, and I always EXPECT the parents to be there. If they choose not to stay then that is fine. At the age of seven, they do not need to be that independent at all.

kerri January 27, 2009, 9:38 PM

Obviously different parents have different ideas about what age is appropriate to send a child alone to a birthday party. Six and seven seem too young to me.
I once had one mother drop off a crying clingy four year old and scoot out the door. She was the only parent who did not stay.
I do not consider it a “burden to the host” to make sure my child behaves and is properly supervised. A Party can be very exciting for little kids. Behavior is not always stellar. One memorable party we attended ended early when one child cracked another one over the head with a hockey stick, spurting blood and requiring stitches. Sometimes a few extra moms around really does save the day. If you are throwing a party for young kids and expect parents to just drop the kids off, be specific in the invitation. Drop off by noon, pick up by three, or whatever. Otherwise, if you are throwing a party for a seven year old, you will wind up with a lot of parents who stay to supervise. All of the parents in the article stayed. All of them, not just a few “overprotective ones”. That means that out of 11 parents, ten thought their six/seven year olds needed the extra supervision of their presence. That is pretty telling, I think. The host should have been clearer when sending out invitations.

Anonymous January 28, 2009, 12:56 AM

that’s because parents baby their kids and don’t let them do anything on their own. We are raisng a nation of weenies.

SD January 28, 2009, 1:02 AM

This article is funny to me because I had the opposit happen to me when my kid turned 7. I sent out invites to all 30 kids in the class thinking that some kids wouldn’t be able to make it and that there would be at least a few parents that would stay. Well only about half the class RSVPed so I thought I’d have about 15 kids. Well they all showed up, not one other parent stayed … oh and some parents left siblings of the kids that had been invited. So I wound up with about 35 kids. Lucky for me I had the help of my husband that day so I was able to keep my sanity. :O)

MICHELLE January 28, 2009, 1:35 AM

I RUN A FAMILY CHILD CARE SO I KNOW HOW QUICK THINGS CAN GO WRONG. I HAVE NEVER ALLOWED MY KIDS TO ATTEND A B-DAY PARTY ALONE. I CALL THE PARENTS AHEAD OF TIME TO LET THEM KNOW I WILL BE WITH HIM AND THEN LEAVE SIBLING W/DAD IF HE’S NOT INCLUDED ON INVITATION. I DON’T KNOW THESE PARENTS,TEENAGE-SIBLINGS,UNCLES, AUNTS OR GRANDPARENTS. ARE THEY GUN OWNERS? DO THEY HAVE DOGS? IS ANY OTHER GUEST A CHILD MOLESTER??? I WILL NOT TAKE THAT CHANCE WITH MY CHILD!!
FOR MY KIDS B-DAYS,I ALWAYS WRITE THE INVITATION TO THE CHILD BUT INFORM THE PARENT THEY ARE WELCOME TO STAY. SOME DO SOME DON’T.PESONAL CHOICE!

J January 30, 2009, 5:00 PM

I would never leave my kids unsupervised at a party, especially if I didn’t know the parents that well. If I know the parents and kids well, I may stay for a while at the beginning to be sure my kids are behaving ok and the situation seems good, then leave just for the middle of the party. I have six and seven year olds. I don’t bring siblings unless they are invited too. I don’t hover and cut their pizza or expect to be entertained but six and seven is too young to just be dropped off. I always expect the parents to stay at our own parties and you should too. J

k :-) February 19, 2009, 11:28 PM

I think it depends on amount of children and type of children. My child is autistic and has severe ticks when nervous. I have never had anyone get mad because i stay. I also help out with the party it is rude not to . How am i suppose to know how a stranger would treat my child during a episode,would they give my child medications on time? Parents stay at my kids party’s and they all help out and sometimes they ask to bring food or drinks which is a nice surprise but not expected. 9 is usually the age of dropping off.Some parents would rather be there due to medical conditions they don’t want other children to know about(my friend in grade school/1st grade had a colostomy bag-would you be able to help a child with this if needed) There is usually a good reason a parent stays-



Leave a reply:



(not displayed)

     




Avoid clicking "Post" more than once
Back to top >>
advertisement