Guest blogger Paul Starke: First of all, a sincere thank you to the momlogic community for all your helpful suggestions and advice. Luke is going to sleep a bit earlier now, and with less help (we've cut his afternoon naptime by half).
This Sunday will mark my first Super Bowl as a dad. Before I became a father, I'd always imagined watching the big game with my kid and got all misty. Now, I'm aware that the day when he'll be able to sit still and appreciate sports is a few years away at best. Still, there are many ways you can have a fun Super Sunday with a baby. Here now, "The 12 Ways Your Baby Can Enhance the Super Bowl" (Please note the Super Bowl-themed roman numerals).
I) You can make crazy side bets - the over/under on poops by halftime? Three.
II) You can carry the baby like a football - Although my wife will probably stiff-arm me for this.
III) Use the game as an educational tool - Teach him how to spit and scream just like your favorite NFL player! Actually, Luke's mastered those already.
IV) The game is an opportunity to introduce the baby to new foods - like guacamole or chili (soft for teething babies) and buffalo wings (mild, of course! I'm not crazy...)
V) Pretend the unruly fans who paint their faces/bodies are lovable muppet-like characters - Look! It's Zany Cheesehead Guy! There's Mr. Barfs-A-Lot!
VI) Dress up like a referee and give your wife "penalties" all day - Give your child the whistle and spend the day throwing the flag at your wife for infractions like "Delay of Making Nachos".
VII) The dulcet tones of John Madden may lull your child to sleep - if so, you can use this as an excuse to buy "Madden 2K9" for the PlayStation 3.
VIII) Help stimulate the economy - Revel in the commercials! Do your patriotic duty by investing heavily in Budweiser. Your child's future depends on it.Yes we can!
IX) Film you and your baby doing "the wave" - put it on youtube. Become instant celebrity. Thank me later.
X) Turn the crib into a tiny replica football stadium! - Actually, that's pretty stupid. I think I saw it on one of the morning shows.
|Jana Mathews is the mother of "four under five" and the author of The Meanest Mom blog.|