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The Duggars Make Me Sick

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The Duggars have 18 kids, which is crazy in and of itself. But teaching your kids to abstain from all sexual relations before marriage... these people are nuts!

Annoyed woman watching tv

Guest blogger Samantha: Every time I see something about the Duggars on TV, I get really annoyed. I'm annoyed that they have so many kids, I'm annoyed that all their names start with "J" and I'm annoyed that everything, EVERYTHING, they do and say in life is about their belief in God. Look, I'm all for faith. I'm all for religion. But I lose my patience when it comes to fanatics whose convictions are SO over the top that their very own children (in my opinion) end up brainwashed and robotic.

Meet Joshua Duggar and his new bride Anna.

Last night, as I watched "A Very Duggar Wedding," a reality special on TLC documenting their "union," I wanted to barf. You see, Joshua, 21, and his bride-to-be Anna, have never kissed (yes, that's KISSED!). Both are evangelical Christians and decided that they wanted to enter marriage "pure." Up until their wedding day, the most action that these two CHILDREN had ever gotten was hand-holding (ooh, naughty, naughty!) And now, their very first kiss is supposed to be in front of 300 guests?! Are you kidding me?

Before I even start in on how ridiculous I think this "purity" nonsense is, let me take a moment to talk about their wedding itself: 1) Too much tulle. 2) Someone needs to let the people of Florida know that the crimped long-hair look was out in the '80s 3) It was a dry wedding. (Um, isn't that mean to make them have sex for the first time without any alcohol???) I nearly died when they said "I do," and went for their first kiss as husband and wife. "Don't turn around!," my husband joked as we laughed about what a massive boner Joshua probably had. Then, as the camera zoomed in on Anna wiping her lips and smiling nervously as her virgin tongue went back into her mouth, I literally got queasy. How ridiculous, I thought. How ridiculous to think that not only will these kids never know what it's like to have had sex with anyone else other than each other, but that they will never know what really feels good and really feels right.

If you don't kiss a lot of frogs, how can you know if you even like kissing your prince?! The beauty of experiencing intimacy before marriage is that you CAN determine what you like and don't like -- so that you're not stuck with someone who you come to discover you have ZERO sexual attraction or connection to! As I watched the Duggars walk into their sad little hotel room (hi, TLC, ya coulda sprung for the "honeymoon suite," no?), I couldn't help but wonder if poor Anna, who will not be enjoying sex for quite some time (uh, remember when you lost your virginity), will one day wake up and wish that she had been felt up by someone other than her husband. Second base, people! We're talking about second base! Her boobies have NEVER even been touched by someone else. PATHETIC.

On Joshua and Anna's website, Anna says: "Like Joshua, I was raised in a Christian home, and my parents encouraged me to save my whole heart and purity for the one that God had for me. As a young girl, my parents told me that it was normal to have desires and thoughts, but that it was my responsibility to commit my future to the Lord and trust God to lead me in His timing." Trust God to lead you? Does God know what turns you on? Grow up! You're not proving anything to anyone and I don't believe for one instance that God is going to reward you any differently then the rest of us. You can still be pure, good, and committed to your husband even if you've had multiple partners.

In my opinion, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are to blame for this craziness. If I had to share well-deserved attention with 17 other siblings, I might pull a lame stunt like this at my wedding, too. Fortunately for me (and my two sisters), my kiss was short and sweet and my wedding night wasn't as painful as Anna's probably was (unless you count the terrible blister I got from my heels). So, to Joshua and Anna: I truly do hope you had fun on your wedding night and in 50 years are still as hot for each other as you were that night at bible camp. And if there's one thing you don't do like your parents, let's hope it's the baby-making part. For God's sake, Duggars, heed your own advice and ABSTAIN.

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244 comments so far | Post a comment now
Janet January 28, 2009, 8:59 AM

I am an evangelical Christian and I think what they did is grand if more people did it or taught it maybe 12 yr olds wouldn’t be getting pregnant. Think on that for something to get sick about.

anna January 28, 2009, 9:28 AM

ok so you made some poins i think it is a little crazy not to kiss before marrage. but to tell someone to have sex before marrige is crazy on your behalf. as a mothe i would love for my daughters to wait till marrage to have sex!! they may they may not and thats our socity…and thats not up for debate in my mind. but to call someone crazy for only being with one person is just ignorent! i have a few friends who saved themselfves sexualy for marrage and to be honst i wish i had. you make it sound like haveing conviction and a solid fath is non sence but who are you to say that? those kids stay out of trouble better then any i have ever hed of…may ur the backwards one!!!

Christina January 28, 2009, 10:04 AM

I find it sad that not having sex is a decision to be ridiculed these days. Maybe sex isn’t THE most important part of as relationship, and maybe not every girl feels the need to do the whole football team in high school just to feel “worldly” or whatever! Look, I have no problem if you want to have sex before marriage. I have no problem if you want to wait. Sex is a personal decision and as long as kids are taught the CONSEQUENCES of sex, that is good enough for me. Yes, the Duggers are strange and I think not even KISSING is a weird way to go, but I would NEVER ridicule these two sweet people for their choices. Only sleeping with one person is nothing to be ashamed of! I’d much rather my future children follow their example then come home pregnant at 15 or 16. And no, i’m not an old person or anything, i’m 23 and *gasp* a virgin! Not saving myself for marriage, but it’s a choice I made. There’s enough bad influences out there without making fun of something that MIGHT set a better example for kids these days.

Toni January 28, 2009, 10:25 AM

The Duggars make you sick? You make me sick.Why would you so severely criticize such a sweet and Godly family? I wish that there were more people like them in the world and less who are so mean spirited.Would you tell your teenage daughter or son to have sex with many partners, so they know what they like? Or,they could stay a virgin until you get married and get books and movies to help in that area.And just an added point,you are no longer “pure” if you have had multiple sex partners.There is nothing wrong with saving yourself for Marriage.

Also a 21 year old January 28, 2009, 1:39 PM

Haha I also watched this, and had some of the some of the same thoughts about it all throught out the show. First of all I was putting myself in their place and I was saying to myself, “Why would you get married at such an early age!” I can’t even process the thought of being married at this age! We are young, its time to enjoy and have fun not to tie down and get married! And to have never kissed at the ripe age of 21! wow. Although i have been followiing the show since it first aired I had always found some things quite rare about them, how all the girls seem to dress the same long crimped hair…. and they seem to submit themselves to the men…come on ladies its the 21st century! Stand up, grow to be whatever you want, and Have the backbone to be strong! Women are not only meant to bare children. I mean even if the duggars dont believe in contraception there are other modes of not having children, like knowing the cycles of a woman. Well to end this on a sweet note, May you both have a wonderful long lasting marriage! :-)

angie January 28, 2009, 2:04 PM

I really can’t believe some of the things that Guest Bloggers write about here!

Secondly, who are any of us to judge anyone?!

I am a Christian and although I am not devout, I will be teaching my children what was taught in The Bible according to my duty. The values taught in the Bible are there for a reason.

People not having any morals or values is the reason for our troubles now.

Shame on you! Live and let live.

But honestly, these kinds of things are better off on Personal Blogs but I guess people like to see debates (drama) too much!

Jan January 28, 2009, 2:25 PM

Why are you so out of control about a family whom choses a life different than you??? I wish I had adopted such morals. The fact is, we are spiritual beings NOT sexual beings so who is to say the young Duggars won’t have a fulfilling sex life? Quit playing God and judging these young people. Maybe if you brought God into your life you wouldn’t have so mch pent up hatred…just a suggestion!!

Andrea January 28, 2009, 3:24 PM

wow! If you can’t stand it, why do you watch it???

dayo January 28, 2009, 3:49 PM

what the hell is your problem, if you lack the ability to teach your own kid responsibility the least you can do is respect their beliefs. unlike other kids in this age, they are respectful and their parent feel it is the right way, leave them be. i wish they would drive u even crazier, but they have the values their parent want and they agree with. so if you don’t like it you can go shot yourself , if that’s not your own cup of teas. bur respect them

Grandma of 5 January 28, 2009, 4:06 PM

I do not agree with everything the Duggar family does but each of us has the freedom to live our life as we want to. I chose to wait to have sex until marriage. I met my husband at 16 and from the first date I never kissed another boy and certainly never had sex with anyone else. I am happy about my choices and feel life is less complicated because of my choices. Married for 38 years.

Christie January 28, 2009, 4:27 PM

Haha, great blog.

In a sea of “omg! I can’t believe you said that!”s… just letting you know I get the humor and I myself can sometimes be sick of the Duggars (even though I always watch them) haha.

Lisa January 28, 2009, 4:42 PM

I just want to address this whole misconception that the Duggar children are simply child slaves. Since when is having chores slave labor? I grew up in a home where my brother and I were both expected to do chores be it laundry, cooking, dishes, mopping, vacumming, cleaning the bathroom, keeping our rooms tidy. My brother is 8 years younger than I am, I was expected to help care for and watch after him when he was little. Was I some slave of my parents? No. I was blessed to have parents who saw the benefits in teaching me that 1) family works together and helps each other to make the home run smoothly 2)responsibility, work and the satisfaction of a job well done and last but not least 3) basic life skills so that when I became and adult I was able to live on my own without expecting everyone around me to wait on me hand and foot. Yeah, so there are more of them so there is more laundry, cooking and cleaning to do but at the same time there are more of them to share the workload. Anyone ever hear the old saying “many hands make light work”? So for those of you who think there is some kind of slave labor going on… Give me a break! And go teach your kids the value of chores!

Like a previous poster I too have canceled my subscription to this newsletter because this was sent to my e-mail as some kind of article. There are better resources for moms/families than one who promotes this ugliness.

denise hawes January 28, 2009, 7:07 PM

Hello. if more people would teach there children, to hold back. wow. think of the diseases there would not be.. or the unwanted pregnacies. Kids these days, seem to get everything handed to them.. if it feels good do it..
Hello. Duggers. they are debt free. there children are not brats like alot of kids are, these days. .with only one or two of em.. They teach there kids about God. God is very real. and ya know it is there business of how they do raise there kids. Besides. look at the responsibilities they are taught at home. by people who actually believe and live there talk.. what they talk. they live. And now people have a problem with all this? hello. think of how many partners most people have had in there lives. And to put down someone who is actually saving themselves for that special one.
I love the fact that such a sweet family are such a buzz in the chatter online. If the kids were heathens.. you all would also have a hay day. I am so proud of this family. Debt free,,oh and there recipies.. Oh my try try try the duggers soap.. it rocks.
This family is truely a pattern to go by.. in most ways.. they are truely a resourceful family. recycle recycle.. recycle.. using the second hand stores.. yea.
ok nuff now. love the show..

HuntersMomTonya January 29, 2009, 11:37 AM

Well I guess your right it would be much better for the world if they thought their kids to sleep around have kids at 14 and unmarried spread disease all over and just for good measure also teach them to rob and kill too! Would this make life better for you! Really get over yourself there are much more important things to complain about than a large family teaching their kids old fashion values!

Mary January 29, 2009, 1:08 PM

The only problem I have with the Dugger Mom and Dad is they make the older children take care of the younger ones. What ever happened to, you have them you take care of them!!!

Christina January 29, 2009, 6:57 PM

I think it is sad that a strong faith and belief in the one true God and a following of His teachings are the odd thing in this society. That’s why we are on a path to self destruction. Do you think that abortion may not be so prevelent if we were not taught that premarital sex was OK? I do. What about STDs? What about divorce? Instead of living “however we feel” how about obedience to our creator! I pray for you all!

Shelley  January 29, 2009, 7:23 PM

I think it’s funny how everyone who talks about you being on your high horse does the same thing to you. They call you narrow minded and then go on to flame you and your beliefs. People are funny.

NM January 29, 2009, 11:26 PM

The fact that you are annoyed by this annoys me. I do not believe in ‘saving” you self for marriage. God knows I did not! I also do not have the same religious views as the duggars. But, I try not judge them on what they beleive. Besides the way kids are these days that do not have respect for their bodies and are practically having sex with anyone who comes along with out caring about the consequences! It is refreshin to see on TV someone who well waited! Do I agree with them no, Do I think that the not kissin till the wedding day was a little to much? YES!! But whatever! No need to get bent out of shape about it. I saw the show had the same thoughts on how crazy it is and moved on with my life. I wish them well and hell they don’t know anybetter they probably think they are having the best sex ever! lol

Anonymous January 30, 2009, 11:26 PM

Wait…..Are you a Mom? How pathetic. What exactly will you teach your own kids? Oh those terrible people, raising their children to be responsible, kind, love God and have good values and morals!!! It is scary that there are Mom’s like you teaching their kids to try many sexual partners. You are a perfect example of the kind of family I would not let my children come near. It is sad that with all of the disgusting things that are going on in this world like child abuse, rape, std’s, terrorism, gangs, lack of values and morals that this family living a good life is what bothers you most!!
God bless your poor children!!!

cathy January 30, 2009, 11:46 PM

Your post made me laugh. While I do watch the show, I watch it mainly to see how the heck they run that household. I think that the older girls are being used as mothers because there is no way michelle can give any amount of time to her children. I aiso heard Josh remark on how hard it was for mom at home, without the older ones to care for everyone else. I think it’s sad that these girls are being taught to that you can only be a wife and a mother(for the record, I am both, 3 kids) and you need to obey this man whom you’ve never even kissed. I also don’t believe their “we’re so conservitive” statement anymore, because if you watch the show, they hand out pictures of the family to anybody!! Jessa is gonna go cousin amy, I think she’s got a wild streak.

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