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Three's a Crowd In My Marriage

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After only two dates with him, my husband and I knew he wasn't right. We talked about it at length and flipped a coin to see who would make the dreaded phone call ...


Guest blogger, Maria: My husband and I thought that adding a third person into our marriage would improve things. Well, that third person was an idiot marriage counselor who only made our problems worse. I guess he helped us, but after our two night stand it was time to cut the ties. He just wasn't the right fit.

It's similar to breaking up with your hairdresser. We've all been there. Although you've told them every personal detail, they've seen you at your worst and you trust them with your entire life (to some of us, hair is life), it's just time to move on.

The therapist is harder to break up with though, because you have a standing appointment, as opposed to having to make one at your convenience. In addition, if you don't show up, you get charged. Sometimes they even make you directly talk to them -- our guy's phone number went to his cell -- a red flag we should have paid more attention to. Plus, he was really into us so we had to break his new-aged heart. A heart that I wanted to rip out of his chest and stomp on, but I suppose, a heart that was in the right place.

It was 6:55 PM on a Monday -- 24 hours and five minutes before we were supposed to arrive at our appointment. We knew if we waited too long, we'd be charged. I handed my husband the phone. He handed it back. We laughed A LOT. We passed it back and forth like we were playing hot potato. There was an instant where I thought how shocking it is that I act like this and actually have a child. We laughed even harder.

I took out a coin. My husband flipped it. He lost! I imagine the feeling I had at that moment was similar to who it feels to win the lottery. He dialed the phone and before I knew it, he started talking fast. "Hi Bill. It's Dick. We can't come to therapy tomorrow night ... No we won't be coming back at all, but thank you so much for all you did for us. We're cured!"

Incidents like this make me think we don't need therapy. Or wait. Maybe we do.

next: The Problem with MLK Day
2 comments so far | Post a comment now
Dr. Obvious February 1, 2009, 7:59 AM

are you two really that inept that you
can’t call the guy and tell him “no
thanks”. Honey, grow a spine and have
your hubby sprout a pair of nads. Its
no wonder you two are in marriage counceling. And whats up with paying
for an appointment that you don’t need
want or show up for. Guys this is
America and you have choices. GET A LIFE

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