Pro-Choice? Quit Crying About Your Miscarriage

Pro-Choice? Quit Crying About Your Miscarriage

Thursday, February 5, 2009

filed under: health logic

Editor's note: momlogic values the right of every woman to have -- and express -- their opinion, and this post is no exception. For those who have a strong reaction to the sentiments expressed below, we encourage you to make your voice heard in our community.

Guest blogger Gina: I respect women's right to choose, but I have little tolerance for pro-choicers who expect sympathy when they have a miscarriage.

These are women who put pro-choice buttons on their backpacks in college and ridiculed pro-lifers for being backward, repressive religious freaks who want to control the world's uteruses.

Ten years have passed and lo and behold, these women have grown up, gotten married, and now have the itch to have a baby of their own. Suddenly the monthly visitor that they were relieved to get when they were 20, now, at 32, plunges them into the depths of depression.

Like vegetarians who eat chicken but not beef, many pro-choice advocates want it both ways. It's a baby when they want it to be, it's a bundle of cells when they don't.

If you believe that pregnancy doesn't produce a baby until some magic number (13 weeks? 20 weeks? 40?), then you must also agree that it's ridiculous to break down in hysterics, set up a memorial website for your "angel," and seek out a grief counselor when you start bleeding in your first trimester. After all, you're simply talking about the loss of a conglomeration of microscopic cells, right?! That's hardly something to cry about.

Advocate all you want, but don't come crying to me when your hypocrisy hits you like a ton of bricks. If you are going to defend the right to abort babies, you don't have the right to be upset when yours dies.

306 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

Foul, disgusting, moronic swill. You are idiots and calling your site Mom LOGIC should be reconsidered if you choose to ever print another “contribution” like this again. You’re heartless and offensive if you feel ANYTHING but profound sadness at someone’s loss regardless of whether or not you agree with their politics of ideologies. Hope something awful happens to you! There! I feel better now! Not really. That’s not how I work…

- Karen

Posted 02/05/09 06:19 PM

You are a monster. Are you a parent? I sure as hell hope NOT.

- Anonymous

Posted 02/05/09 06:23 PM

I know just what you mean. It’s like those people who are adamantly pro-life when all they are talking about is an un-born child, but then flip-flop and become pro-death when it comes to capitol punishment, or children burned to death by American weapons in our war of aggression in Iraq. They certainly see those lives as less worthy. As I have always said, anyone who claims to be pro-life and supports other forms of killing is just a hypocrite and a crack-pot.

- Rhonan

Posted 02/05/09 06:34 PM

This is my first visit to Momlogic. After seeing this garbage, it will be my last. As a proud pro-choice mother of 2, my impression is of a ridiculous, illogical, hate-filled mess of a rant with no point but to stir up a fight. Have fun with that! Buh bye.

- chain of memories

Posted 02/05/09 06:35 PM

You can usually figure out who the misogynistic buttholes are by their ability to spout the phrase, “I respect a woman’s right to choose, BUT…” It’s also a good way to figure out what websites I won’t be reading again in the future.

- Jennifer Armintrout

Posted 02/05/09 06:48 PM

“If you are going to defend the right to abort babies, you don’t have the right to be upset when yours dies.” Seriously? SERIOUSLY?!? Speaking as a pro-life woman who lost a “conglomeration of microscopic cells” (a deeply wanted, and loved conglomeration of microscopic cells) at 11 weeks gestation, screw you, Gina. Screw you.

- Laura

Posted 02/05/09 06:49 PM

I am one of those women who has pro-choice buttons on her bag, who believes in every woman’s right to choose what to do or not to do with her own body. I was also raped at the age of twelve. I became pregnant. And I had an abortion. I was not able to support a child at that age, and I also had no intention of carrying the child of my rapist. I will not apologize for that abortion; it is no one’s business but my own, and it is certainly not the business of some loud-mouthed bitch of a guest columnist online. I also had a miscarriage last year, fifteen years after my abortion. But I guess I wasn’t allowed to mourn my baby, or be upset by the event, because I had an abortion at the age of twelve? Guess what — no. I had the right to have that abortion, and I also had (and have) every right in the world to mourn the child I lost by miscarriage. It is people like you, “Gina”, who give pro-lifers a bad name. For God’s sake, you don’t even know what “pro-choice” means, apparently. Being pro-choice means believing that every woman has a CHOICE when it comes to her own damn body and her own reproductive rights. Before you go spouting off about something, maybe you should try at least getting the terminology right. You can take your self-righteous bullshit and you can go straight to hell. You’ve got no right to tell any woman how to feel when she loses a child through miscarriage, no matter what her stance is regarding abortion. You are scum.

- Michelle

Posted 02/05/09 07:01 PM

Yo, Gina, you are high.

- FOM

Posted 02/05/09 07:02 PM

Being pro-choice is not the same thing as being pro-abortion, you stupid insensitive %$#!!! I am a woman who has had 4 miscarriages but I am also pro-choice not because I would ever choose to have an abortion or because I think anyone should choose to have an abortion but I am pro-choice because I think EVERYONE should have the RIGHT to choose!!! The government or anyone else for that matter should not be able to tell me what is right for me. SHAME ON YOU and SHAME ON THIS WEBSITE FOR POSTING SUCH MORONIC INSENSITIVE S@@@!!!! I would post this article on my blog but it seems that all you really want is more attention and I will not give it to you. COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY RIDICULOUS! YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVE NOT GONE THROUGH THE PAIN OF MISCARRIAGE AND ALTHOUGH I THINK YOU ARE ONE OF THE LOWEST FORMS OF LIFE I WOULD NEVER WISH THAT ON YOU> YOU STUPID B$#@%$!!!!

- NOYDB

Posted 02/05/09 07:10 PM

This piece displays the fine-tuned logic and verbal acuity of the average late-night talk-radio caller, assuming said talk-radio caller was both extra-hateful and extra-drunk. I understand MomLogic’s wish not to censor, but I’m sure we all are aware that the more controversial a piece is, the stronger its writing should be. “I laugh at your dead baby because I don’t understand the word “choice”” is not a strong argument. It’s a bit of hateful flack that is as medieval in tone as “Don’t come crying to me if your child dies of the plague, that’s what you get for missing Mass three weeks ago.” I do not believe that children are rewards or punishments for moral uprightness. I believe that they are a responsibility that should be undertaken with love and care. Really, that seems like the more “pro-family” stance.

- purpleeffingshoes

Posted 02/05/09 07:11 PM

It is a clump of cells. The difference is the woman wants that clump to continue growing, and CHOOSES to form an emotional attachment. Some choose to abort due to circumstance. It’s called CHOICE. Where is it ok to force an unwanted pregnancy on another? Pregnancy is 9 hard months on the mother, leading to 18+ years of responsibility both emotionally and financially. A person can be pro choice in others and pro life for HERSELF. It’s when you force YOUR choice on ME that I lose MY choice. And where will it end? Will you take away our birth control because it ‘kills’ babies? When all it does is prevent them? That’s punishing women for having sex. Where does it stop?

- Kit

Posted 02/05/09 07:17 PM

PRO-CHOICE IS NOT PRO-ABORTION!!!!!!

- Horrified

Posted 02/05/09 07:27 PM

really, now, does anyone truly think this way?? Faulty logic, and just plain mean.

- Beth

Posted 02/05/09 07:31 PM

Pro-choice does not equal pro-abortion! This should not even have been posted. How can someone spew forth such HATEFUL things?!? Just because we are pro-choice, does not mean we do not have the right to mourn when we lose a PLANNED pregnancy. How idiotic. Gina, please go sit down and shut up. We,and I speak as both a pro-choice woman and a woman who has lost a planned pregnancy, are not wrong for our beliefs. Explain to me how we should not be able to mourn the loss of our children. Explain to me how we as mothers and those of us who are continuously trying to be mothers are not deserving of a little one, just like anyone else? This post is absolutely disgusting.

- WryBeauty

Posted 02/05/09 07:33 PM

that was harsh and mean and uncalled for.

- haute mama

Posted 02/05/09 07:35 PM

seriously, dumbest thing I have ever read.

- steve

Posted 02/05/09 07:37 PM

Hey, wow, anti-choice ideology really is about hating women. Who knew?

- Punditus Maximus

Posted 02/05/09 07:41 PM

Wow you are one screwed up individual to even think the way you do.