Is Your Husband Gay?

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

filed under: karrine steffans

Guest blogger Karrine Steffans: It's a strange question but I get it all the time: How can I tell if my husband is gay? The inquiry is simple enough but the answer is complicated. However, there are a few generalizations I'm willing to make.

There are gay men who are married to and have families with women. Some of these women have no idea or have a hunch and choose to ignore it. Some are well aware of their husbands' duplicity and either choose to accept it or find it incredibly erotic and a welcome addition to their sexual habits.

Some of you may be wondering if your husbands' kinky fetishes border on homosexual tendencies.

There is a stark difference between an explorative man, who engages in new and exciting forms of pleasure with his wife, and a man who finds other men sexually attractive and cannot have or enjoy sex unless there is another man, or the thought of one, in the mix.

Still, it is not your man's willingness to let you do anything to, with and for him that makes him sexually duplicitous, but rather, when only a man or thoughts of a man peak his interest and satisfy him in coitus.

Want to get a "straight' answer out of your man? Suggest that you have no issues with two men being together, even as an extramarital activity, and then gauge his reaction. It would be nice to not have to beat around the bush, but if a gay man is married to a woman, obviously he already has an issue with honesty and straightforwardness.

Good luck if this is an issue in your life!

These topics and more can be found in The Vixen Manual: How to Find, Seduce and Keep the Man You Want, July 2009. Visit Karrine.com for more.

Karrine Steffans is a stay-at-home mother of two. A New York Times best selling author, she is a pop culture figure who has injected her real life experiences and advice into a new generation of women and demographics commonly overlooked.

15 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

Good advice. I’ve had female friends ask me if a man doesn’t want “traditional” love-making, does that mean he’s gay. Not necessarily, but your tip seems like the perfect way to isolate the issue.

- G.

Posted 02/10/09 09:11 PM

Too bad Karrine Speaks about her own reality. As her current man has been undercover for a long time.

- Anonymous

Posted 02/16/09 09:54 AM

“How to Find, Seduce and Keep the Man You Want.” From a human toilet who is always screwed, left, denied and laughed at? Spare me Superhead. Spare us all!

- Anonymous

Posted 02/16/09 04:20 PM

Thanks Karrine… your always good in my book!

- Anonymous

Posted 02/17/09 05:53 PM

Again, women seeking relationship advice from a woman who cant keep a man. Spare us of your humility every man you have convicted of being gay was pure BS (i.e. big tigger) but your current bf likes for you too put anal probes in his butt (darius mccrary). If you’re married you’re already five steps ahead of this blog poster….now can someone direct me to a blog on this site with valid advice backed by good reasoning?!

- Common Sense

Posted 02/18/09 10:26 AM

To Common Sense: Men actually have these things called prostate glands that give them a lot of pleasure once massaged. They probably get more pleasure from anal play then women do. Little FYI

- sharay

Posted 02/18/09 02:48 PM

why is everyone so harsh? you have no idea how someone has lived their life as you were not there. if you don’t like her or her advice, don’t read it. keep in mind that the man that you share your bed with most likely had his share of karrine’s before you. it is downright disgusting to see women come here and rip a woman for no legitimate reason. it is pathetic, catty and uncalled for.

- getreal

Posted 02/23/09 11:52 AM

these people come on these blogs and share w/us all of their dislike for a persons views and opinions when we dont care … If U dont like her why are U on her blogs in the first place….not common sense..a bit confused i’d say….i love karrine regardless of what alot of people think nobody is perfect and everybody has a story…Im glad and inspired by her for sharing it with us…I love Karrine Im not a fan of her because of her fame but because alot of people women and men the same can relate to her in some kind of way…she’s just like everyone else… living life….

- *Me-All-Dai*

Posted 02/25/09 09:46 PM

Stop reading Karrine’s blog if you don’t like her.

- M

Posted 02/28/09 11:22 AM

Yo, WTF? People act like they’ve been living some BS christian BS perfect life. Every body makes mistakes…EVERYBODY. So just because she chose to tell her story and get paid silly duckets that gives you the right to call her names????? The main people HATING on this girl probably sucked and f*cked more bums than Karrine has AND you broads are still broke! Get off it, stop hating and at least f*uck with some ballers and not these ghetto broke down pieces of trash that drives Charger, 300s or what ever else “hood” Bentley they can barely afford. She f*cks with rappers and actors, y’all f*cks with crack wrappers and men with corns on their feet. LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

- ItsDeathBiotch

Posted 02/28/09 04:09 PM

for all of the haterz, will you please stop reading and POSTING on karrine’s blogs?! we all have a past. if mine was worth telling, trust me i would!!! and so would you! now move along please.

- Bhudda Flii

Posted 03/12/09 04:42 AM

I so agree! We all have a past, I do and it is one that I don’t want every one to know about if you know what I mean. However fast forward to right now, I understand that I do not know the answer is what I am looking for, who brings it does not matter, I want the information! You are all so right! Stop Hatting!

- StraightShooter

Posted 03/12/09 11:55 PM

I liked the post. I think it was great advice. However, I would not take advice from her on how to keep a man because she has no experience. Let’s all keep it real. With that said, I have nothing but love for her.

- Honestly

Posted 03/16/09 02:51 PM

ke8sjC comment4 ,

- Aozhswgd

Posted 06/23/09 01:29 PM

Lol

- Anonymous

Posted 09/25/09 01:18 PM