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Single Moms: It's Time to Ask a Man Out

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What are you waiting for, ladies? Go ahead and take the plunge.

man and woman on a date

Rachel Sarah: If you've been watching "The Bachelor" -- or recently saw "He's Just Not That Into You" and loved it -- then please don't read this post.

That's because I'm going to plead with you do to everything those reality TV and Hollywood women don't do.

Some of you might know that I'm a single mom who started dating around the same time that my kid was the same age as The Bachelor's son.

Like Jason Mesnick, I was also in my early 30s, juggling my job, childcare, and coffee dates in between tantrums.

And even though I'm not a Bachelorette, I learned, like Mr. Mesnick, to go after what I wanted.

Although I have my share of neediness and desperation, I refuse to be like those weepy women. "Give me the red rose, Jason!" (Why don't you just grow your own roses?)

Don't get me started about those women in "He's Just Not That Into You," who are so miserable just waiting for the man to make the first move. Excuse me for getting all Ms. magazine on you, but where's your power?

I even asked my postman out last Valentine's Day.

I'd been eyeing him behind the window for a while and I finally worked up the courage to hand him this note:

"I don't know the first thing about you, but I would like to take you out for Valentine's Day. If you're not single -- or if not interested -- can you please put this in the paper shredder ASAP?"

My cousin Marge -- who reads my blog religiously -- emailed to reprimand for not considering what she called "Rule #1: Make sure he is not married and is actually available." (Oops!)

It was too late: I already handed my white envelope to him.

"This is for you," I said.

"For me?" he said.

"Uh huh."

He called that evening. It turns out that he was single -- a single dad, actually! But he already had plans on Valentine's Day. It was his daughter's birthday, and he was taking her to a basketball game.

My point is: What do you have to lose by asking a man out?

C'mon now, what's the worst thing that can happen?

He'll say that little two-letter word: "no." How many times a day do you say that to your kid? It's no big deal, right?

Is there anyone you've been eyeing? Why don't you ask him out? Then report back here!


next: Wipe Your Own Kid's Butt!
4 comments so far | Post a comment now
Tammy February 11, 2009, 9:56 AM

Great post and great advise!

Brenda February 11, 2009, 5:58 PM

I was a single mom and I went to volunteer places to look for Mr Right. I figured if a man volunteers his time to the community he is a giver and I was right. I meant a man who was a search and rescue volunteer for 11 year and was also a teacher!!. This meant he cared about people and could be a teacher at home for my 4 year old daughter. I asked him out after I begged a person to give him my number and we were married a year later. He is a great DAD! My daughter is a daddys girl and he spoils her! She is now in private school, we moved to Tahoe and opened our own business and everyone loves him.

Brenda February 11, 2009, 6:10 PM

If you look in the right places and pick a person who is the best person for your kids then your on the right track. NEVER go to bars or clubs. Think about what your kid needs, not your needs!! The child must come first not you!! Your needs are not important, only your childs needs are important. SO pick the best man for your child. Nothing is more sexy than a man sitting down with your child teaching them and playing with them.

Alex87 October 22, 2009, 12:56 PM

For example, Cisco announced that they were canceling their global sales meeting in favor of a virtual event. ,


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