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Going to Bed Angry

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Sugar Mama: I blame "The Cosby Show" for a lot of things that went awry in my life. Lisa Bonet's clothes, which -- on her -- looked fabulous. On me? Dreadful. The whole "Gotta marry a doctor thing?" Bill's fault. (Thankfully, I gave up on that by the time Rudy hit puberty.) But the greatest Cosby offense on my life was that don't-go-to-bed-angry thing. Those two Huxtables resolved all marital issues pillow-to-pillow -- even if it took all night -- in order to insure a clear conscience during their rest, so they could start the following day anew.

couple angry in bed

I lost boyfriend after boyfriend during these kinds of nights! Because, here's the thing -- when I'm mad, I'm mean, irrational and dramatic. I'll suck the blood out of any issue and spit it in your face. And then cry about it, making you feel bad, forcing you into an apology.

What I really need at night is SLEEP. Sleep melts away most offenses. Or, at least, calms my beast. So, last night a friend commented on how Joe and I "never fight." "How do you guys do it?" she asked. I laughed and told her that we do fight, but that we never do it at night. "Sleep on it and your issues rarely seem as big in the light of day."

"Yeah, and then get up at 5 in the morning and get the hell out of the house." Joe added.

That was very funny, honey. I think I'll watch Cosby reruns until you get home tonight.

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51 comments so far | Post a comment now
Sara March 8, 2009, 7:22 AM

So true!!! By morning everything feels so much better after I’ve slept on it!! Great to hear someone else who does not feel that the popular saying of “never go to bed angry” may not be the best way.

dee March 8, 2009, 12:56 PM

i completely agree. after 32 years of marriage i’m still too tired to fight at night. actually by now we rarely fight. most things can be put in the who really cares? file. :)

The Mother March 8, 2009, 2:44 PM

We have a different system.

My husband stews, and I ignore.

I’m sure the shrinks would say this is bad, but if it’s not important enough to have a row over, what’s the point of having a row?

We’re at 25 years and counting.

Anonymous March 8, 2009, 5:50 PM

great story—sugar mama rules again—a mother of 4

Anonymous March 8, 2009, 7:34 PM

Completely AGREE!!!

I remember someone giving a wedding toast once that said “Never go to bed angry”. Man, there would be alot of nights where I would never go to bed!

Joanne March 11, 2009, 12:06 AM

Agreed..I always need some time to reassess the situtation

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