Dr. Michelle Golland: Stand by your man?? I think not!
I don't think even Tammy Wynette would stand by Philip Markoff, who has been arrested for murder and is suspected in multiple armed robberies. Many of us are in shock that his fiancĂ©e, Megan McAllister, was completely unaware of his activities -- especially if what is said in the media is true, that he had a gun, bullets, panties, and handcuffs in the small apartment they both shared.
We are also shocked by her statements of support for him, given what appears to be a lot of evidence pointing toward his guilt. First, if she did not have any clue or suspicions, she must truly be in emotional shock. This is the man she was going to be marrying very soon. She may need to stay in denial about his activities to protect herself, both emotionally and to not be an accessory to any of his crimes. In her most recent statement, she says her life and the life she wanted is now totally changed. Megan McAllister may have ignored any warning signs because she was focused on her future with Philip and the fantasy life she was dreaming about.
Women who stay with husbands or partners who have committed horrible crimes such as rape or murder tend to be passive, nonassertive, unquestioning, and very fearful of losing their men. Megan McAllister may also be depressed and have low self-esteem. She may not have questioned his activities because she didn't believe she would find another man to love her, and again, didn't want to lose her future fantasy.
We also must consider that Philip Markoff may have been very good at leading a double life and was able to manipulate Megan to alleviate any suspicions or concerns about his behavior that she might have expressed.
It appears that financial pressures had taken hold of Philip Markoff, most likely due to a gambling addiction. It seems that robbery was the primary motive, which resulted in the tragic murder of the young woman. They both may have been feeling the financial pressures of being in medical school, acquiring student loans, and an upcoming wedding, such that when he appeared with money, she was simply relieved and didn't question him regarding its origin.
It will be interesting to see how Megan McAllister will navigate this over the course of the next few weeks and months.
|Dr. Golland is a USC graduate and a licensed Clinical Psychologist (PSY#16974). She works with adults, teens, and is an expert in the field of marriage and relationships. Dr. Golland has given her expert advice on CNN, HLN, MSNBC, ABC, and Fox news. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband and wonderfully exhausting two children.|