Just Say No to Boys in Beauty Pageants

Just Say No to Boys in Beauty Pageants

Monday, April 13, 2009

filed under: gay uncle

Gay Uncle Brett Berk: One of my colleagues here at momlogic recently brought to my attention an intriguing little story: the tale of a mom who, lacking a daughter (as well as any sense of shame), took to enrolling her son in beauty pageants. Sashay son!

Now, I'm generally opposed to these kinds of kiddie cavalcades -- not because it isn't hilarious to watch young children stumble around on a stage in movement-restricting acetate ball gowns, butchering the lyrics to "I Believe I Can Fly." No, I hate pageants because I don't believe that young children should be forced to a) conform to stale and retrogressive notions of femininity -- at least not before they're like, 9 b) wear the aforementioned plasticky dresses, or c) perform, particularly if it involves memorizing complex dance routines, strutting around like a slut, or singing on key while smiling.

That said, enrolling a little boy in one of these extravaganzas would be pretty hilarious, if he were into playing with the whole girly thing (see my previous article). It wouldn't solve issues b) or c) but it would certainly go some way toward subverting letter a). RuPaul's Tiniest Drag Race, here we come!

Sadly, when I watched the clip of this kid, he was a butchy blonde brat, all decked out in the world's tiniest tuxedo, and being instructed by his stage mother in how to flirt with the female judges ("Point at the ladies and say, You're so pretty!") Boring! Not to mention the fact that in the same allegedly glorifying clip, the little hellion was shown responding to his mommy's instructions by having a knock-down, lying-on-the-floor, kicking-and-screaming tantrum. Three more strikes against pre-school processionals.

Connect with Brett in the momlogic community!

Brett Berk, M.S. Ed. has worked with young children and their families for over 20 years--as a classroom teacher, preschool director, and research consultant--and is the author of "The Gay Uncle's Guide to Parenting."

4 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

What a ridiculous rant. Why is it ok to force all of this pageant BS on girls, but not boys? And why is it that if a boy has to be effeminate if he is made to be involved in this hogwash? What a sexist double-standard. The video is proof about what people always say about pageant parents. And I think the author of this article might find himself in a minority. I can already hear the women cheering “Aww, how cute!” about little boys singing in tuxedos and saying “you pwetty” at pageants.

- Mike

Posted 04/13/09 07:06 PM

RIGHT ON, Mike! Perhaps the author is a bit jealous his mother never took the time to polish him up a bit….

- Nikki Moungo

Posted 05/28/09 05:03 PM

Did either of you READ the above “rant”? It clearly states “I’m generally opposed to these kinds of kiddie cavalcades” and explains why. Come ON!

- Family Matters

Posted 10/13/09 10:24 PM

maverick and bartholemew?

- jkv

Posted 10/13/09 10:31 PM