Help! My Daughter is a Pink Junkie

Help! My Daughter is a Pink Junkie

Monday, April 20, 2009

filed under: andrea

Am I to blame for daughter's pink addiction?

Momlogic's Andrea: My daughter is literally addicted to pink. No not "Let's Get This Party Started" Pink, the color pink. Any shade. Hot pink, pale pink, cotton candy pink, shocking pink. The only thing more shocking than her jonesing for pink is how many pink products are marketed to little girls. The toy aisle of Toys 'R Us looks like it's been drenched in Pepto-Bismol.

I feel like I'm to blame. I gave her that first "hit" when, in a nesting frenzy, I purchased a package of pink onesies. I, the woman who vowed I would not instill any gender roles, have purchased more pink items in the last three years of her life then I have in my lifetime.

So strong is my little girl's love of the redish pastels she's constantly trying to score some more pink shwag, "I want a pink ... cup, spoon, cat, whatever." Last night she told us she wants her skin to be pink.

It hasn't always been this way for little girls. In 1914, the "Sunday Sentinel" advised mothers, "If you like the color note on the little one's garments, use pink for the boy and blue for the girl, if you are a follower of convention."

But according to a British Newcastle University study, a preference for certain colors is hardwired in all of us. "It might date back to hunter-gatherer days, when women were the primary gatherers," says Professor Anya Hurlbert, who led the study. Apparently our first obsession with pink hues sprang from our ability to identify ripe, red fruits.

Educator Brett Berk is skeptical of the "fruit and berry" theory, "In other cultures, says Berk, "pink and blue don't mean anything."

As for my daughter's addiction, Berk says she will eventually tire of her pink fetish. "They have to work through these traditional forms of gender to try to work through to what's on the other side."

Does your kid need to go to pink rehab? When does the fixation end?

Connect with Brett in the momlogic community!

Brett Berk, M.S. Ed. has worked with young children and their families for over 20 years--as a classroom teacher, preschool director, and research consultant--and is the author of "The Gay Uncle's Guide to Parenting."

11 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

My 7 year old is also a “pink addict”. Most of her clothes are some hue of pink, she has many pink stuffed animals (with their own pink outfits, of course), and her room is pink. Personally, I think that pink is a very feminine color and if my daughter wants to be girly I am fine with that. I do encourage her to do “non-girly” things and she is held to the same standards that her brother is. (No getting off easy just because she is a girl.) I’m sure there will come a day where she shuns everything pink and wants only black. But that stage is hopefully many years away. Right now, I’m going to enjoy this stage for what it is.

- juliefun

Posted 04/20/09 01:49 PM

If “pink” is a phase that girls need to work through for gender identity, what does this say about young adult females who are still obsessed with pink? I know people who HAVE to wear at least one pink item of clothing or accessory every day. Does this mean they are insecure with their feminine or masculine sides?

- anonymous

Posted 04/20/09 02:20 PM

Buy your daughter the book “Pinkalicious”!

- Chrystal

Posted 04/20/09 03:05 PM

Oh yeah- I am right there with you. My DD is only 2 1/2 and we can’t get away from it. It’s funny because I did everything to stay away from pink because I also didn’t want to set up those gender roles from the beginning but I guess she’s early in her rebellion!

- Lindsay Lebresco (Graco)

Posted 04/20/09 03:24 PM

Let her have wants she wants. Why do mothers feel the need to ‘cure’ their daughters of personal taste, just because it doesn’t match their own? Aren’t we wanting them to learn to be able to make their own choices? I wished my daughter would get tired of the overpriced clothing store with clothes that dripped girlyness and glitter everywhere. She did get tired of it and went straight to Hot Topic!

- Diane

Posted 04/20/09 03:54 PM

My daughter the girlie girl’s favorite color is orange… She LOVES it. Everything has to be orange. It is very hard to find orange things for her. She wants orange walls, an orange car, orange fingernail polish, orange shoes, orange sheets, orange stuffed animals, orange clothes, etc… My other daughter, who is 100% tomboy’s favorite color is pink, but HATES girly things. I think it all depends on the kid and what they like… You should be happy she likes a popular color!!

- Sarah

Posted 04/20/09 04:05 PM

You must get the book “Pinkalicious” for your daughter. It is about a little girl in love with pink. She eats so many pink cupcakes that she literally turns pink!

- angstmm.com

Posted 04/20/09 09:16 PM

I loved pink when I was little. It was my favourite colour. Now, at 22, I hate it. I’ve hated pink for most of my teen years, and still do now. I won’t wear it. My best friend also hates pink (even more than I do), and she won’t even dress her little girl in pink!

- Anonymous

Posted 04/20/09 09:30 PM

I love pink and my daughter does too and everything is pink. I don’t see it as an issue. She’s a girl afterall and if she wants to wear pink dresses all the time so be it. I’m not worried too much about gender roles. I’ve never seen the big deal in it. This obsession with girls not being girls is to me just odd. My daughter is a girl and if she wants girly things and not boy things then she’ll get girly things. She will not however cry while playing softball or be a drama queen.

- Pamala

Posted 04/20/09 10:14 PM

It might be that its more noticable when a girl is obsessed with pink, but of all the kids I know, both boys and girls, they go through a period of “color obsession” where they want EVERYTHING to be their favorite color. I think that kids find comfort in a certian color, so thats what they want.

- Anonymous

Posted 04/21/09 12:03 AM

nothing wrong with pink, it definitely suits her so no problem

- jane jones

Posted 04/21/09 11:03 AM