Diane Mizota: I'll admit it. I have a cougar fantasy. Hot twenty something guy, witty charming banter, hot sex. Yup, that's pretty much it. But when you're actually reminded what twenty something guys consider witty banter, oh man, I just lost my boner.

"The Cougar" on TV Land is one tall order. Not only is it "illuminating a cultural phenomenon changing the entire dating scene," it aims to end the double standard of older men dating women half their age, and to find The Cougar, aka Stacey Anderson, a likable, sexy mother of four, her next husband.

Let me just say, the ick factor is high. Witty banter? Not quite. A self-proclaimed Southern gentleman tried this classy line out on Stacey. "How'd you like to try an Australian kiss? Kind of like a French kiss, but down under." Eeeew. And let's not forget the cheesy cop who said, "You're under arrest. You stole my heart and you have the right to remain delicious." Did he steal that from a male stripper? How she didn't vomit in her mouth just a little bit upon hearing these I'll never know.

To eliminate guys, she either kisses the guys on the lips to stay or they get the cheek if it's a no. She has to kiss like 15 guys on the lips in 10 minutes. Mathematically, you realize the last guy to stay has just kissed the 14 other guys staying too. Ick.

Look, this isn't Masterpiece Theater, it's a Cougar-ized carbon copy of "The Bachelor." Is it gender bending? Empowering? Revolutionary? No, no and no. Is it mildly entertaining to see a woman exert power over younger men? You betcha. I am especially curious to see how this all shakes out when she brings the boy toys home to meet her children. (Her daughter is older than one of the boys) I mean, how Oedipal is this going to get? I'll keep you posted. Will you be watching?

Diane Mizota is an accomplished TV host, actor, writer and producer who began her career as a professional dancer. She is a first-time mom who currently lives in Los Angeles with her husband and toddler son.