Nine months ago, I gave birth to my beautiful son, Joseph. Long before I knew I was pregnant, I was sure of one thing: that I would not be breastfeeding.
The outpouring of comments the post received was overwhelming. Here's a sample:
As a mom who breastfeeds I have to say that I agree with you. I loved the bonding with my child and everything, but just like everything else, breastfeeding is NOT for everybody. If you can and want to do it, great, if not that's fine too. The most important thing is to be able to enjoy your child and if breastfeeding is not allowing you to do so, then it is not worth it. - Emma
I am shocked and amazed. I get it that it's your personal decision whether or not to breastfeed. When I was pregnant, I was terrified that I would not be able to, because of a previous medical condition and surgery on my breasts. Luckily for me, I have been able to, and my 13-month-old son is still breastfeeding now. But to try and become "militant" about NOT breastfeeding seems horribly careless. Whether you like it or not, breastfeeding is what is best for every child and trying to encourage others to abandon their children in this way is just reckless. - Seriously?
FINALLY!! Someone feels the way I do about breastfeeding!! There is way too much pressure! Kudos to you for speaking your mind. - Christy
You could have just titled the post "I'm Selfish and I don't care what's in the best interest of my baby" and saved people the trouble of reading it. It sounds like having a baby was a "thing to do" and not something you care to think too much about. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised as it's another example of the ego-driven me, me, me culture pervading the world. Good parenting is driven by decisions that are focused on the best interests of the children. The implication that you are a "bad" parent is warranted. - Arp
This whole article is tough. I breastfed, I think if you can you should, but, I find it hard to team up with other breastfeeding moms. The extremes these moms will go to, to drive their points home, is hard for me to read. Comparing not breastfeeding to abortion? Whoa. Do I agree with your choice of not breastfeeding? No. Does it affect my life one way or another? No. Go live your life & I'll live mine. - Rachel M.
I'm all for stirring up some healthy conversation, don't get me wrong. And, while the breastfeeding vs. bottle-feeding battle is definitely a hot-button issue in the mom community, I never dreamed it would provoke some of the mean-spirited comments that were directed at us moms, regardless of what side of the argument we were on.
The whole experience reminded me of something I learned on the playground as a child. Girls are mean!
I am astonished by how good we are, as women, at tearing each other down when really we should be building each other up. We are all part of the same team, and our ventures into motherhood should only strengthen that bond. As women, we are unique in many ways -- not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. We should strive to use each other as a network for encouragement and enlightenment in our individual paths of motherhood.
But back to bottle-feeding. I believe in the old adage, "my body, my choice," and for me, breastfeeding falls into this category. It is a choice. It is not a mandatory part of motherhood. Thankfully, we have supplements (formula) in this day and age that can give our babies the necessary nutrients, for those of us who choose to bottle-feed and for those who are not given a choice. Yes, science and numerous studies say babies who breastfeed will be healthier, but I can't help but look at my husband and myself (both of us were not breastfed) and our respective siblings who are all capable human beings and adults.
While I respect all mothers and their choices in this matter, I will continue to educate myself on the differences of bottle-fed versus breastfed and encourage new mothers to get all the information necessary to make their own decisions, just as I have.
|Christina Montoya Fiedler resides in Los Angeles, CA, with husband Andy and her son Joseph. She juggles baby and work from home as a freelance publicist and attributes her strong love for life and sense of humor to her loving familia.|