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Marijuana Mamas!

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Is pot the new pilates?

Gina Kaysen Fernandes: A new wave of reefer madness is sweeping suburbia -- but it's not just teenagers who are lighting up. Middle-aged, middle-class soccer moms are smoking pot ... a lot. These women aren't stoners: they're teachers, lawyers, and, perhaps, even your neighbor who prefers puffing a joint to sipping chardonnay.

woman smoking marijuana

"Marijuana is the magic in my life that helps me unwind, stay sane, and have more energy," says Sonia, a 24-year-old mother from Los Angeles. Working full-time as a restaurant manager leaves Sonia feeling stressed out and drained at the end of the day. She smokes once or twice daily to relax. "I have a stressful job, it's something that helps me wind down so I don't take out my frustration on my husband or my child."

Sonia became a mother at the age of 22 and suffered from some depression. She turned to marijuana to help curb the baby blues. A doctor later diagnosed Sonia with anxiety and wrote her a prescription for the herbal remedy. Sonia gets her stash from a medicinal marijuana clinic and takes comfort in knowing the pot she smokes is legal and high quality.

Mary is a 37-year-old, self-employed mother in Seattle who smokes pot several times a week. "It is relaxing, fun, and once in a while I self-medicate for cramps or headaches," said Mary. She says she prefers smoking to drinking beer because it's easier on the body and has fewer calories. Mary buys her bags from a dealer, making it more risky because "there's still a real danger of being arrested," says Mary.

The website,, surveyed hundreds of women nationwide between the ages of 25 and 60 years old. Out of that group, 52% admitted to using marijuana at least ten times a year. 27% smoked between one and seven times a week. And 78% of those women knew someone who got high on a regular basis.

The results of recent surveys are no surprise to Allen St. Pierre, executive director of the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws, or NORML. "These findings are indicative of women's willingness to admit to the social stigma that was so high in the 1970s and 80s," said St. Pierre.

Both women who shared their stories with momlogic say that many of their friends smoke weed. But while it seems "marijuana mamas" are everywhere, this silent majority prefers to stay in the shadows. "They think if they admit it, it makes them a bad mom," says Sonia, who believes the opposite is true. "It makes me a better mother. It clears my head and allows me to focus on my child." Mary says it's important to be a responsible smoker "by doing it mindfully, only when I have downtime."

Sonia has a 2-year-old and is a few years away from the dreaded drug talk. But she doesn't plan to hide her habit from her son. "I want to be honest, I don't want him to feel marijuana is an evil thing," said Sonia. Mary says she's very open about her drug use with her daughter, Sierra. "We talk about responsible use pretty often," says Mary. Both women say they never smoke in the house or in front of their children.

There's a lot of debate over how to talk to kids about using drugs without sounding like a hypocrite, especially if you're the one hitting the bong. Zero-tolerance proponents believe you must support abstinence only. But advocates say a more real-world approach is to discuss drug use in moderation. This method is detailed in a pamphlet called "Safety First: A Reality-Based Approach to Teens and Drugs," which is distributed by the California PTA.

This growing group of ganja smokers certainly has the attention of lawmakers. A renewed debate is heating up over legalizing (or at minimum, taxing the medicinal sales of) marijuana to cash in on this potential cash cow. According to NORML, marijuana remains the fourth largest cash crop in America, in spite of the estimated $10 billion that law enforcement spends annually to attempt to outlaw the plant. In California, marijuana is the number-one cash crop. Thirteen states have laws on the books that allow for medicinal use of marijuana. The most recent federal survey finds more than 100 million Americans have tried pot at some point, and more than 14 million used it in the past month. "I think a lot of moms are starting to loosen up," says Sonia.

Both of these moms support legalizing marijuana. "It will help our economy, help our state, and take away that stigma," said Sonia. Mary believes pot smoking should be about personal choice, not politics. "I'm an adult and I make life or death decisions every day. The drug war has killed lots of people; smoking pot hasn't killed anyone."

What do you think? Are these moms on the right track -- or are they whacked out on more than just weed?

Photos courtesy of Michael Johnson

next: Have Your Cake and Meat it Too
625 comments so far | Post a comment now
Bill  June 29, 2009, 9:36 AM

According to the British medical journal Lancet and the American Medical Journal smoking pot can cause MORE damage to your lungs than tobbacco. It is also more addictive. Besides just what we need in this world is some wacked out person driving their kids to school. As if the roads arent dangerous enough.

jayandtiti June 29, 2009, 9:38 AM

a nationwide polls suggests 3 out of 4 adults believe that ADULTS who possess marijuana should not face jail or arrest and 1 out of 2 now say it should be regulated like alcohol. marijuana is the 3rd most popular recreational drug behind alcohol and tobacco. 100million americans have smoked pot. 50,000 americans die each year from alcohol poisoning(not to mention dui it would go up) and 400,000 from issues relating to smoking cigarettes, where as pot is NON-TOXIC and you CAN NOT overdose from pot. some people would say that the 1st drug they used was pot…simply because it’s the easiest to get, the want for cocaine does NOT come from pot. the want for heroin does NOT come from pot. that’s a CHOICE that person makes for themselves. like Stephen Gutwillig, California state director for the Drug Policy Alliance says “It’s time to end the charade of marijuana prohibition, regulate the $14-billion-a-year market and redirect law-enforcement resources to more important matters.”-source Rolling Stone magazine issue 1075, April 2,2009.

autigr78 June 29, 2009, 9:40 AM

I also am a marajuana mom, as are many of my friends. We are all successful mothers and business women with husbands and households to take care of. I find marajuana takes the edge off and is also very helpful with cramps and headaches, without the harmful side-effects of painkillers or alcohol. Please legalize!

CHRISTINE June 29, 2009, 9:41 AM


tmb June 29, 2009, 9:42 AM

Oh, just legalize it already. Keeping it illegal just keeps lawyers, judges, and prison guards employed. What a joke if it weren’t actually so serious. Almost no one under 75 has a real problem with it. I’ve seen alcohol cause and/or feed so many anger and violence issues, but when is the last time you saw someone stoned start a fight? It’d be great if we all needed nothing, and kudos to those who never drink or smoke, but the rest of us need a little help now and then. My attitude is I don’t drink and drive or drink and work or drink and take on serious decision making and if pot were legal I’d use the same criteria. There will always be addicts…clearly making it illegal hasn’t changed that.

Herb advocate June 29, 2009, 9:44 AM

Marijuana Mama for over 35 years! My children were being taught that herb is as dangerous as heroin, LSD, crack, etc. I cautioned them against the use of those dangerous drugs as well as prescribed drugs AND alcohol. Alcohol is accepted even though violence is closely associated and drugs prescribed to treat depression cause SUICIDE!Marijuana is illegal so those of us who use it will stay out of politics. It should be legal AND prescribed much more widely.

TJ Nichols June 29, 2009, 9:44 AM


Anonymous June 29, 2009, 9:48 AM

and you do realize that you don’t JUST have to smoke pot right? it can be eaten and with the advancement of “vaporizors” most of the carcinogens can be removed from the smoke, and THC can be made in pill form.apparently alot of people don’t realize that this issue is NOT sweeping suburbia IT’S ALWAY BEEN HERE!! we’ve just decided to stop hiding. alot can’t get the fact you don’t know whom of your friends smokes. with your view point WHY would anyone tell you? example: POT ruins lives and these people can’t function…do you want these people teaching your children? 2 words for you…Michael Phelps…won what 8 gold medals for your country…wide eyed killer,rapist i tell ya. unable to function in the real world,yep you got that right. and the only reason he apologized is because he got CAUGHT!

Kada  June 29, 2009, 9:48 AM

NO one has ever OD’ed from smoking weed. Happy, Hungry, Sleepy. The effects of weed! And let’s not forget, it wouldn’t even be illegal if Randolph Herst hadn’t been concerned with controling the paper market.

sara June 29, 2009, 9:50 AM

I am 56 and used to smoke back in the day—when it was cheap, and most of my generation did—but once our oldest child got to be about 4 we stopped. Now that the kids are grown, we have had some a couple of times and really enjoyed it, but my husband’s employer has random drug testing so we are sort of playing Russian roulette when we do. And it’s so expensive now and harder to get (at least for us oldies.) It should have been legalized a long time ago—the worst side effect is the munchies…the best—my husband is so adorable when he’s stoned, funny, talkative, romantic. Oh yeah, that’s why I married him…do you think it was the pot?

Dean in the USA June 29, 2009, 9:52 AM

I support the legalization. It is similar to alcohol and we should tax and monitor (driving under its influence is not cool) its use — but I have seen what it does to your brain waves and personally wouldn’t use it. Just another really bad habit.

Anonymous June 29, 2009, 9:54 AM

Great Moms on drugs…..beyond disturbing.

Kristy June 29, 2009, 9:54 AM

I’m not a mother but I do smoke marijuana on a daily basis. I stuggle with REALLY bad anxiety and I’ve tried the pills and they made me go crazy. I’d rather puff a joint than take a pill everyday of my life. I’ve cared for children after smoking marijuana and had not one single problem. My reflexes and response time are the same as if I hadn’t smoked. I don’t seem so distracted and can consentrate better. There’s nothing wrong with taking a few minutes for yourself and hittin the pipe a few times! It’s very hard to be angry when you smoke, you’re just happy! Not everyone can be “just happy” on a daily basis…. this helps! Everyone needs to feel happy at some point of their day. Even driving… you’re more cautious when you drive after you smoke. It absolutely baffles me that alcohol is still legal after all the deaths its caused. Marijuana related deaths- ZERO. So you make it legal, less people get arrested and all the people that already smoke pot continue to do so and the country can makes some killer cash… what’s the problem here? People will always be smoking pot, that’s not going to change. Might as well change the laws so our tax dollars can stop being wasted on incarcerating people for smoking pot!

Fairmount, In. June 29, 2009, 9:56 AM

My children are raised now. But when they were young. I too, smoked. Along with many many other mothers. The kids had a great home and many many happy family times. It wasn’t till after a bitter divorce from an alcoholic husband that I too fell into alcoholism. Mainly because I and 8 other siblings were born to alcoholic parents. At 34 yrs. old I never thought I would ever have an alcohol problem. But I did! My theory…If you want to smoke pot, do it responsible, just like they say on their ALCOHOL ADS. But if you ever decide to drink, you had better BEWARE!!! P.S. I have been sober for many years now:)

IDon'tFeelGuiltyAnymore June 29, 2009, 9:56 AM

I am a single mother of two kids. They’re growing up healthy and well-rounded, compassionate and strong, and Mom smokes several times a week. I wish I weren’t buying on the sly, that part scares me, but other than that, I don’t feel there’s a thing in the world wrong with what I do. Legalize it, and help the economy, says I.

Anonymous June 29, 2009, 10:01 AM

Glad my Mom wasn’t a piece of s h i t druggy like all of you. What a trashy uneducated world we live in today. You make me sick to stomach!!!!

Anonymous June 29, 2009, 10:02 AM

really men “grow breasts” lets look at the effects of alcohol….causes men to grow breasts, bellies, removes the lining of your esophogus,stomach, destroys the liver, pancreas, brain cells galore, it can also remove your loved ones, the clothes from your back and the roof over your head. it takes over 30 days to detox an alcoholic where as a pot smoker MAY experience a “jones” for a day or 2. prescription drug with side effects like suicide, tremors,loss of sight, getting up in the middle of the night doing things with no recollection(amnesia) the next day, anal leakage…sorry i don’t think so, not in my body. i use and an anti-anxiety medication and will keep it that way, im not going to take force fed valium or xanax or anything else. if i want to relax valerian and pot work best for me

ST June 29, 2009, 10:03 AM

For all you mamas out there, take this test - can you go smoke pot only once or twice a month, or do you have to do it every day? Can you go a week without it? A month? Are you making excuses or refusing to try other ways to “relax”? (like exercising or simply playing with your children to see their joy they get from spending time with you?) Is the cost to fund your habit causing you to have any trouble paying for the needs of your children or maintain your household? While you may say that now, give yourself the test and see how long you can resist. Then you can attest to see how responsible of a user you are. If you are smoking every day or every other day, then you have a drug ADDICTION. Eventually the pot will do major damage to yourself and your loved ones. Pot will lead to experimenting with other drugs also. Ok all you migraine sufferers - ever heard of Imitrex or any other migraine med? Cancer patients - I realize your medical need. But if you’re smoking just to “relax”, thats bull! If pot was legalized do you realize what that would do to the drug dealers and suppliers in other countries? It certainly would NOT make them legit business people! They have dedicated their lives to criminal behavior - including your street supplier! No way they would become taxpaying citizens. This cash operation was designed to be kept from the government. And funding the weapons - well they certainly don’t buy those for the sake of protecting just their pot. The drug trade goes WAY deeper than that. Why do you think it hasn’t been legalized yet? Sure booze is legal, but it is also highly regulated. And citizens pay for the crime of drinking too much - whether it is behind the wheel or destroying their families. And they go to jail for it. Same thing with pot. Do you think that if it was legalized it would be less expensive to feed your habit? Think about it! These dealers would owe so many more people and would want to continue hiding their operation so they could avoid paying taxes! Please people think about the negative effects marijana has on our country. Legal or not that will never change. Again just because alcohol is legal doesn’t mean the stupid ones out there became less stupid. Addiction is addiction is addiction and stupid is stupid is stupid. Plain and simple. If you “followed the money” and saw the people who grew the pot and the top end of the dealer chain and where your pot money is REALLY going, you might think twice about what you are doing. It follows the same chain as cocaine and many other illegal drugs.

Mouse June 29, 2009, 10:07 AM

I am 22 and a dude. No maraijuana mamma here, but I have also smoked a fair amount in my day, and I can tell you it helps me focus a lot more (I have ADHD) and allows me to think more clearly when creating music. However, I have become over-anxious on it because A, my dad is now drug testing me, and B, I’m afraid of getting arrested again (the time I got arrested it was BS, trust me). It’s stupid to think that it’s a big deal. How many times do you hear about accidents involving pot? Now how many do you hear about involving alcohol? How many fights and such are related to pot? How many to alcohol. You do the math.

Motherof4 June 29, 2009, 10:07 AM

All of my kids smoked at one time or another, as I did when I was 14-15. They hid it and knew what they were doing was something to keep on the low. 1 became a heavy smoker and then moved onto heavier drugs and finally entered a rehab at 23. He married at 26 to a total pothead who grew up smoking with her Mom. She didn’t finish school, doesn’t work, has a 6 month old that she beleives she needs pot to take care of. Her, her Mom and brother still smoke together and have elimated everyone from their lives that doesn’t smoke. She doesn’t cook hardly cleans and has barely bonded with the baby. But she thinks she’s the greatest and complains about everyone that doesn’t get high! I suspect she even robbed her own change jar to buy it. Pot before baby, food, cloths, utilities. If you talk to her she sounds just like most of these pot Momma’s. She thinks of herself as a social, daily pot smoker. I think of her as a total stoner. My Grandson will be just like them and it kills me.

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