My Sneaky Friend Stole My Business Idea

My Sneaky Friend Stole My Business Idea

Friday, June 19, 2009

filed under: relationship logic

After telling my friend about a business idea -- she stole it right from under my nose!

Carolyn writes: About a year ago, I told my friend Pat about a business idea I had. I described it in detail and even shared the clever name I had come up with. I remember the conversation like it was yesterday. She seemed intrigued at the time, but didn't really say much or exude any vibe that she thought I was onto something. Anyway, life got in the way. I have a full-time job and not a lot of free time, so I never did much of anything with the idea ... but I remained hopeful that I would one day.

woman talking on phone while men read newspaper

I recently opened the local newspaper and saw an ad for "my company" -- the name and the business idea just staring me in the face. I called Pat and started raving about how I couldn't believe this could happen, and she calmly interrupted, "Carolyn, it's me. I started the business." She then starts telling me how she figured if I didn't do anything with it in a year, that I wasn't going to, and how she had been thinking about it for a year. She incorporated the name, bought the domain name, etc. I exclaimed, "It was my idea, my name, how could you do this?" She said once I shared it, it wasn't mine anymore. I am still stunned. What do you think?

Leslie Adler: Dear Carolyn: If The Friendship Court had the power, I would throw Pat in friendship jail and throw away the key. As I like to say, in my "lawyer language" ... "this sucks." Pat could have done this so many different ways, one of which would have been to ask you to collaborate. Instead, she committed a lie of omission by telling you nothing and stealing your idea.

I am a friendship cheerleader, in general, but I don't think this issue can be remedied. She didn't seem to show any remorse when you found out what happened, and someone who tells you that once you share an idea with your friend, it is no longer yours isn't likely to be offering to make you a partner in the venture now. Besides talking to this "judge," I think you should consult a lawyer.

What do you think? Has something like this ever happened to you?

Leslie Adler mother, lawyer and creator of the Vuv Club shares her witty thoughts on the many roles women play in their everyday lives. Leslie also combines her legal skills and friendship experience as presiding judge of Momlogic's "The Friendship Court."

filed under: relationship logic

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This is legally actionable on your part. Please do consult a lawyer. I hope this ends in your favor.

- Mom2two

Posted 06/19/09 09:27 AM

Lawyer up!

- Anonymous

Posted 06/19/09 09:35 AM

definitely sue her pants off! she even admitted to it already!

- maeby

Posted 06/19/09 10:36 AM

Seriously, what do you think you are going to get by lawyering up? A big fat bill and a year or more of extra stress while you dwell on a bad situation. If she is a startup, you might be able to shut her down but what kind of monetary damages will you really get? And, can you even prove that you gave her the idea? It’s one thing for her to admit on the phone, but how much weight will that have in court? Your time is better spent with your family, getting better at your job, or starting a new business opportunity. Good luck :)

- Cyndee Woolley

Posted 06/19/09 02:46 PM

Save your reputation and take the high road, she got this one over on you - move on and make up a better idea, perhaps become her competition and use your prowess to leap over her. Lawyer fees and time will not change the outcome except by you moving forward and coming up with something even better - YOU CAN DO IT :-)!

- MelMe

Posted 06/19/09 03:28 PM

If she’s really your friend, talk to her about it. It is your idea, and she should give you the opportunity to collaborate on it. If she refuses, maybe you should count yourself lucky that she just stole your idea, and nothing more.

- Meemee

Posted 06/19/09 03:39 PM

PS - Don’t share any more ideas with her!

- Melme

Posted 06/19/09 03:51 PM

Don’t share anything with her anymore!!

- lori

Posted 06/19/09 04:18 PM

Pat is not and was not your friend. No friend would do something like this. Jail of any kind would be best.

- Marge

Posted 06/19/09 04:25 PM

Drop her as a “friend”. Tell her she sucks, not only as a friend but a human being as well. Then spread the word on the internet about her bad business morals & ethics (or lack thereof) and advertise in the same newspaper and hope she goes under. Karma’s a B!!!

- RachelAZ

Posted 06/19/09 05:47 PM

If she was truly a friend, rather than assuming you weren’t going to do anything with this, she would have called and offered to set this up WITH you. Dump her like the egocentric idea-sucking vampire that she is. Sue if you like,but you’d probably be better off (and wiser)just deleting her from your life.

- Laura

Posted 06/19/09 11:03 PM

I mainly agree with Laura. But seriously, it’s not that hard or takes that long to register a domain name. Maybe 10 mins. As filing a business name with the state? Print the form out from the Secreatary of State website, fill it out, send a check for te registeration fee and mail it in. You didn’t even do that? You were waiting for “some day”? Lots have people “wait” for some day and guess what - nothing. They don’t lose weight, don’t go back to school, don’t buy a summer cottage, take a foreign vacation or start a business. Pat should have asked you how serious you were or if it was just talk. But how serious were you if in a year you took not action? And RachelAZ - Pat could turn around and lawyer up and sue Carolyn. That’s really bad advise.

- Chrissy

Posted 06/22/09 01:02 AM