twitter facebook stumble upon rss

Spanking is Child Abuse!

sign up for the momlogic newsletter Tweet This

If you ask me, there is NEVER an excuse for hitting a child. And in my opinion, if you do, you should be arrested for child abuse and have your children taken away from you.

woman in jail

Radical Mommy: There is no doubt that spanking is a controversial topic. Do you do it? If you do, when do you do it? How do you do it? And how often?

Well, in my opinion, hitting a child is no different than your husband hitting you, and there is no excuse for it -- no matter how "bad" your child is.

So many people use the excuse, "Nothing else works. Spanking is the only thing that gets through to him/her." That's bullsh**. Spanking is just an excuse for taking your anger, frustration, and poor parenting skills out on your child.

People often spank because their child continues to do something that they deem annoying, dangerous, or defiant. Isn't that what being a kid is about? I mean really, how annoying can a child be that would warrant beating them with your hand, a belt, or a paddle -- whatever your weapon of choice might be? And yes, your hand is a weapon when it's inflicting pain on another person.

Have you ever considered that your child allegedly "responds" to the spanking because you are finally paying attention to him? After all, how does a kid get to be so annoying? You allowed him to become that way instead of nipping it in the bud when he was younger.

The fact is that if a man hit you because he was annoyed with you, frustrated with you, or thought you were doing something stupid or dangerous, he would be arrested and charged with abuse. Why then is it OK to hit a poor, defenseless child who has no choice about who his parents are? Unlike you, who chose to be with the man you are with.

Spanking is a cop out. It's a way to avoid parenting children and it's a way to take out aggression. It's also ABUSE.

So people, next time you get the urge to "spank" your kids, go find a puppy or a kitten and smack them around -- I'm sure they deserve it too!


next: Obscenity Appears on Yearbook Cover
134 comments so far | Post a comment now
Anonymous June 18, 2009, 5:53 PM

your a moron for posting this and i bet your the mom with the unruly, selfish brats in the store. there is a huge difference between spanking and abusing. get a life!

LLW June 18, 2009, 6:09 PM

To Anonymous 5:53 -
I have raised two fantastic kids without EVER HITTING THEM - NOT ONCE. My children behaved wonderfully in the store, at restaurants, even on airplanes. When they were difficult toddlers, we stayed home. We disciplined them by following through on our threats to take away whatever they loved at the moment, or to leave our location if they did not behave. Those who spank do not want to take the time or make the personal sacrifices required. BTW - those two kids are great teenagers now. They are kind, thoughtful, wonderful people who know that their parents love them and follow through on what we promise.

Briellis June 18, 2009, 6:31 PM

What in the world, Anonymous? If you’re going to blast someone in writing, try using correct spelling, syntax, and punctuation.
“Your” is not the same as “You’re”.

Also, I wasn’t spanked as a child and I don’t spank my daughter. Incidentally, we’re both intelligent, well-adjusted women (with excellent spelling skills).

Secret Mommy June 18, 2009, 6:32 PM

We’re not a spanking family, but I agree with Anonymous that there is a difference between spanking and “abusing” or even “hitting.” I personally don’t discipline through spanking, but I’m absolutely SICK of hearing parents get on a soapbox and judge others for their family decisions regarding discipline. If you don’t agree with spanking, don’t spank your kids. But don’t accuse others of abusing their children.

Nessy June 18, 2009, 6:33 PM

I have two very respectful teenage boys. During their younger years I did spank them if I felt they needed it. I believe there is a BIG difference in spanking and beating!!! If you look around at kids today, alot of them are disrespectful and unrully. I believe most of that is because their parents didn’t discipline them and were not taught bounderies.

RachelAZ June 18, 2009, 6:42 PM

Spanking is not “beating”. And it certainly isn’t abuse. What do you do when your child simply doesn’t CARE that you are going take stuff away? I respect other people’s decisions to not discipline their children, so respect my desicion TO discipline mine! Get over it!

Danielle Buffardi June 18, 2009, 6:58 PM

wow…touchy subject.

I was “spanked” growing up. Never beaten or abused, but spanked when it was necessary.

There is a huge difference between being spanked and abused.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion on the subject, however, you came across extremely harsh in your post.

Not everyone shares your view, and I’m one of them.

chris June 18, 2009, 7:09 PM

Oh yes Racidal Mom, you’re the one who would love for your son to be gay when he grows up, who would strip and do porn to make money, who thinks that Jon should cheat on Kate and who can not go more than 3 days with drinking. Maybe you don’t spank your child because you’re too drunk to do so. I don’t need someone with your way of raising your child to tell me how to raise mine. Oh and for the record I DON’T spank my children but if I did it certainly wouldn’t be your place to judge me!

andrea June 18, 2009, 7:45 PM

this is what the differnce between the older 45 and up generation and the up and coming tween generation. if my parents had talked to their parents the way kids do now their butts woulda been spanked or mouth slaped, the same way i would have been done and i’m 27. i work out in the public and its sad the way parents let there child/ren treat them and i fully blame the parent(s), u dont have to spank them but u do need to gain the respect of ur child/ren. my daughter is 5 and even with out spanking she knows to repect her father and i, but if she ever was so defiant that spanking is what it took i see nothing wrong with that. it worked for me and i’m not scarred and neither is my husband. but there also is a very fine line between spanking and abuse. and if i were to see someone cross that line i would have no problem speaking up about it either. (please parden the spelling errors and other bad gramer)

Monica June 18, 2009, 7:49 PM

She said, “Spanking is just an excuse for taking your anger, frustration, and poor parenting skills out on your child.” WHAT? My mother was a wonderful parent and she never spanked me out of her frustration or anger and was not a poor parent. I equate the fact that I am a good decent moral upstanding citizen of society now because my mother was such a wonderful parent who spanked my behind when I needed it. And when I look back I laugh at some of the times that she really really needed to do it. My mother was not a bully. She was not abusive and she never laid her hand anywhere she shouldn’t have. When I did something wrong I didn’t do it because I wanted attention. I did it because I wanted to do it. My mother ALWAYS paid attention to me. We have a very close relationship because of that now. So before you go spewing all this none sense about what you think about parents who spank their children you need to check your facts because they are totally unfounded. And I am sure that there are many moms on here that can vouch for having a great mom who spanked them and now they thank them for that discipline. By the way I spank my son and he is my number one buddy. He loves his mama because he knows that his mother cares for him just as much as her mom cared for her. Now I’m not saying that your form of discipline is wrong but who the heck are you to judge anothers parenting skills just because you just happen to have the type of children who didn’t need spankings. Not every child needs spanking. Some you can talk to, some you can put in time out and some get the point when you take away a favorite toy. Me I use all forms. And I do what’s appropriate for the situation. But don’t you ever tell these women on here that they are lacking in some way because they are doing what they deem is right as parents. Our choices are tough but you are no one to judge someone and tell them they are a poor parent for their PERSONAL FAMILY CHOICE. What’s good for goose is NOT always good for the gander! Mind your own business.

Grow Up June 18, 2009, 8:06 PM

First of all to CRIS, are you telling me you wouldn’t love your child if he or she was a homosexual? No one wants to be gay, no parent wants their child to be gay but to say it the way you did was ignorant at best. I hope for your children’s sake they do grow up straight so they won’t have to go through the heartache of “losing” their parents when they come out.

Secondly, SPANKING is NOT abuse! There is a difference on giving a wack to the butt versus using a full strength hit or punch. I also don’t use spanking because it can be a contradiction to children. We tell them no hitting but we spank their butts. But I have family and friends who spank and it is very lightly and there kids are some of the most fun loving and respectful ever. Tell me, it’s MUCH better to take the child away for lights spankings and put them in foster after foster where they will probably be abused for real and go through complete mental trauma right? Grow up!

Grow Up June 18, 2009, 8:07 PM

First of all to CRIS, are you telling me you wouldn’t love your child if he or she was a homosexual? No one wants to be gay, no parent wants their child to be gay but to say it the way you did was ignorant at best. I hope for your children’s sake they do grow up straight so they won’t have to go through the heartache of “losing” their parents when they come out.

Secondly, SPANKING is NOT abuse! There is a difference on giving a wack to the butt versus using a full strength hit or punch. I also don’t use spanking because it can be a contradiction to children. We tell them no hitting but we spank their butts. But I have family and friends who spank and it is very lightly and there kids are some of the most fun loving and respectful ever. Tell me, it’s MUCH better to take the child away for lights spankings and put them in foster after foster where they will probably be abused for real and go through complete mental trauma right? Grow up!

Grow Up June 18, 2009, 8:08 PM

First of all to CRIS, are you telling me you wouldn’t love your child if he or she was a homosexual? No one wants to be gay, no parent wants their child to be gay but to say it the way you did was ignorant at best. I hope for your children’s sake they do grow up straight so they won’t have to go through the heartache of “losing” their parents when they come out.

Secondly, SPANKING is NOT abuse! There is a difference on giving a wack to the butt versus using a full strength hit or punch. I also don’t use spanking because it can be a contradiction to children. We tell them no hitting but we spank their butts. But I have family and friends who spank and it is very lightly and there kids are some of the most fun loving and respectful ever. Tell me, it’s MUCH better to take the child away for lights spankings and put them in foster after foster where they will probably be abused for real and go through complete mental trauma right? Grow up!

Nikki June 18, 2009, 8:36 PM

Here we go again…spanking is not abuse, and often times very necessary. I think Radical Mommy could use a spanking.

chris June 18, 2009, 8:46 PM

First off I will love my children no matter how they grow up and who they love. I never said I wouldnt but if you read Radical Mom passed post you will see that she is in fact says that she HOPES her son grews up to be gay.
Secondly, I didn’t say that I agree or disagree with spanking…I said that I have the right to make that choice for myself and my family and that I don’t want or need anyone else to judge how I raise my children. Isn’t that all any of us are saying.

SesshoumarusGirl June 18, 2009, 10:18 PM

Radical Mommy needs to get that stick out of her @ss and get off her soapbox. Spanking is NOT child abuse.

Sorry, but just because YOU (RM) don’t like it doesn’t mean its abusive. How about you look in the mirror before you judge others.

angstmom.com June 18, 2009, 11:19 PM

i totally agree! great article. no excuse for spanking. it is disciplining through fear- and there are many other ways to discipline with love and respect. thank you radical mommy- you rock (with or without your wine!)

Tiffany June 19, 2009, 1:22 AM

I can’t even imagine a person being so critical and judgemental against mothers disciplinary action toward their OWN children!! I think that you’re trying your hardest to make other mothers feel guilty for what they feel is right for their family. AGAIN, A SMACK ON THE BEHIND IS NOT THE SAME THING AS A ABUSE!!!
Smaller children especially don’t understand reasoning! You can’t sit down and explain to a 2 year old consequences?!
AND WHO SAYS US PARENTS EVEN ENJOY SPANKING OUR CHILDREN?? I don’t like to do, but it’s the most effective at getting their attention!

Diane June 19, 2009, 2:32 AM

thank you for taking a very clear stand on this. Parents who spank need to take a good long look at their actions. I’ve never seen it done after a logical, calm analysis of the situation. No, parents spank when they’re angry and they ‘lose it” - no different than spousal abuse.

cyndi June 19, 2009, 7:07 AM

I’m so weary of this discussion. Spanking (not beating) is just another tool to use when parenting. I have never had to spank a child in my house beyond 5 years of age (and seldom before that). We spanked properly when they were very young and didn’t have to after that because they knew at that point that we would if their behavior didn’t change—the threat was enough. I have 7 children ages 6 thru 26, and they are the most thoughful, pleasant, well-behaved children I know. I get told this daily by other people, too. I do have to say that every day I see kids that could used a good spanking!


Back to top >>
advertisement