Aries
Taurus
Gemini
Cancer
Leo
Virgo
Libra
Scorpio
Sagittarius
Capricorn
Aquarius
PiscesChris Brown's Apology Blows!
He calls THAT an apology?
Dr. Michelle Golland: Chris Brown's apology video was well crafted, but truthfully was not very heartfelt on his part. Chris Brown should have issued this "type" of apology much earlier in the process. His apology is also diminished by the fact that he tried to wiggle out of the charges or make light of his actions, as he did on the Internet in the last couple months. Given the fact that he has already been sentenced, I would expect him to have been less guarded and more personal. Truthfully, reading from a teleprompter seemed lazy, given the importance of his statement.
It is offensive that he keeps referring to hitting, choking, and threatening to kill Rihanna as "the incident." To me it seems he is continuing to distance himself from the act of violence he committed while trying to make us believe he is "truly sorry." He should have unequivocally accepted full responsibility long ago. He should admit that this was not his first violent episode; there have been others.
I am glad he wants to earn being a "role model," but it would have been much better if he just said it straight out, honestly, painfully, and with a truly greater understanding of his actions, and used that power to effect change as a celebrity. What he read from the teleprompter sounded like a PR spin more than a true apology.
This is what I would have wanted to hear from Chris Brown:
"In February, I committed a terrible crime. I physically assaulted Rihanna, my girlfriend at the time. I never should have hit her or become violent in any manner. I have struggled with anger and rage issues before because of the violent home I grew up in. I never wanted to become like my father, who hit my mother, but now I understand the horrible legacy of domestic violence. I want to plead with other men and women who feel their anger is out of control to seek counseling to help understand and change your behavior before someone is seriously hurt. I will be going to high schools to speak out against teen dating violence and help educate our youth about this very serious problem. By doing this, I hope to gain your respect back and be able to truly earn the title of role model."
My Chris Brown apology would have been followed by a website address where people could go to get help if they are struggling with teen dating violence or domestic violence. This would have shown that he truly understood the reach of his celebrity, and had a real desire to actually help others, rather than a canned response clearly fashioned to boost record and ticket sales.
I do believe people can change. I truly hope Chris Brown is getting the help he needs to understand why he became so physically violent. He is young, and I am sure has many people "handling" him, his career, and his PR, but after this apology, I don't think they are doing a very good job. Chris Brown and those around him should realize that the power of fame and fortune is fleeting and comes with great responsibility to contribute to the greater good of social causes, especially those that personally involve us, for better or worse.
 | Dr. Golland is a USC graduate and a licensed Clinical Psychologist (PSY#16974). She works with adults, teens and is an expert in the field of marriage and relationships. Dr. Golland has given her expert advice on CNN, HLN, MSNBC, ABC, and Fox news. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband and wonderfully exhausting two children. |
- share:
-
-
-
more:
- |
- 8 Comments
Sad that you as a mom won’t allow him to redeem himself and change. I hope your children never see they type of mistake/lapse in judgement that he saw. I believe his apology. I accept that he wrote it before hand,because there was a lot that needed to be said. Instead of trying to cause the kid commit suicide from depression lets try to help kids like him who were obviously affected by domestic violence. Let’s offer solutions of help and compassion b/c what he witnessed and experience wasn’t a walk in the park (the same for rihanna). He’s talked about his childhood trauma in detail prior to the incident and it obviously cut him deeper than he thought. You people have something to say about him not apologizing and now something to say about him apologizing. Accept it as a step in the right direction and give him the pathway to reform himself and teach others from his mistake. It may not be what you or Dr. Golland would have said but I thought it was what needed to be said. It wasn’t sooner b/c he had to follow the direction of legal counsel but it was given to the person that counts most from the beginnng (rihanna) and that’s who counts. Give him a chance. I’m almost positive that he’s going to make you and all the other iron-hearted critics eat your words.
Reese, I have no words for you. I can not believe that you are asking people to be compassionate towards this man. Was he compassionate when Rhianna was begging him to stop beating on her?, or was he compassionate when he was choking her? Im sure you’d be singing a different tune if he had killed her, would you then be asking for compassionate and for us to give him another chance? I surely hope you never have a daughter who is abused, because i’ll make sure to remind you to have compassionate on the loser that is trying to kill her.
No Lucy I don’t have a daughter. I actually watched my mother. Yes, I cried in horror and watched my mother along with my brother. And you know what we grew up to think we were over what happened and normal b/c we were out of the situation and my brother got in a heated argument and fight when he was about Chris Brown’s age with his girlfriend with the same kind of outcome. That’s when we realized that he had been affected much more than we thought. That’s when we realized that we all needed to seek professional help b/c the scars were much deeper than we thought. My brother is no monster, my brother was scarred and he needed help. Which he got 10 yrs ago and has never had another fit of rage like that one. So yes, I can feel compassion for him as I felt compassion for my brother and my mother. Did you watch your mother get brutally attacked on a regular basis? If you did and were able to escape with no scars then I’m happy for you but some of us weren’t so lucky. Some of us were affected more than others…On you questioning my compassion it comes from a deep place, I’m genuine in my comments so please don’t question my sincerity. They both used bad judgement fighting in that car while they were driving could have killed an innocent person then we’d be blaming both of them. Bad judgement was used all around in this incident. We need to teach all people (men and women) that violence is not the answer and it’s not excusable from either sex.
Its so sad that noone seems to want to allow this 20year old to redeem himself. No matter what he does now it is deemed wrong by the experts. He should apologize, he should not apologize, he meant it, he didnt mean it. It would have been better if he did it before, he should have waited longer. He said the wrong words, he should have apologized this way, he should have apologized that way. I mean come on. What he did was despicable, I grew up with my mother being beat constantly by my father and so I know this is a horrible way to grow up. But he is a kid!!! He has to be given a chance to make good and to move on… And I know that the cycle is real and it is hard to break but does he not deserve another chance. I dont understand, it appears it would have been better if he was strung out on drugs, addicted to painkillers or destroyed hotel rooms or was rude and nasty to his fans or got busted shoplifting or cheated constantly on his significant other with groupies etc….I mean those are forgivable offenses.
Resse, Im sorry to hear what you have gone through and appreciate your food for thought.
I have to say people saying he should have done this sooner must not understand the legal system either. I think what he did was bad in general and frankly no apology changes what happened, but remember when you are arrested you have the right to remain silent and anyone who believes that they don’t need to is sorely in for a surprise when they use everything you say against you. So I’m not surprised he didn’t apologize sooner, he would have been a moron to do so earlier.
I think that whatever action he takes he is going to be bashed down. I do not think that this is the way the public should react to what he is doing, he is young, he made mistakes, but we all made mistakes, doesn’t mean we can’t forgive him. I think that by the time that this blows over, no one is going to remember this “staged” apology. And man, the media. They are taking all sorts of different spins on this apology. From people thinking it was nothing but a tactic to get back in the publics good light, to people who are thinking that this wasn’t just a one-time incident. There is this really great video that looks at both sides of the story. You should check it out…
http://www.newsy.com/videos/chris_brown_takes_a_bow
I agree with Dr. Golland. Beautiful writing on her part. Too bad that wasn’t the real apology.