Hands Off My Belly!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

When my belly started growing, at first people just kinda peeked with that question in their eyes: "Is she getting thicker or is she preggers?" Then, as it grew bigger every day, I got the eyes that went straight from my face to my belly (Hey! You skipped over my growing bust!). And now, they straight-up stick their hands out and touch my belly as if it's public property. OK, umm, WTF?

Momlogic's Talitha: In my eighth month of pregnancy, there really is no doubt that I am pregnant. I have this baby sticking out like a soccer ball as if she's saying hello to the world, and it seems the world really wants to say hello back. The other day, a strange man walked right up to me and said, "Boy or a girl?" and simultaneously started rubbing my belly -- a ritual reserved only for me and my husband. The next day at the market, the checkout girl reached right over her register and put her hand on my belly and said "Awwwww!" What is going on?

I'm not sure why people are so fascinated with touching a pregnant woman's belly, but what boggles my mind even more is -- they don't ask! They think it's OK just to put their hands on me!? Why?

Imagine if I walked up to you and just started massaging your shoulders, or holding your hand, or rubbing YOUR belly -- wouldn't you be a little freaked? Next time you see me, or any other pregnant woman, maybe you ought to ask if it's OK to touch a total stranger's belly before putting your dirty fingers all over her and her precious cargo.

And BTW, once my baby is born, if you don't ask to touch my baby before you do it, I'll be putting my dirty fingers all over your face!

filed under: pregnancy & baby logic

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This happened to me quite a few times in my 3 pregnancies, but it was always women, never a man. Here’s what I did, when a stranger comes up and rubs your belly, just nonchalantly stick your hand out and put it right on her boob. Don’t move it, don’t rub it, don’t be creepy about it, just stick your hand on her boob, and keep the conversation going. Smile politely as you do it, too. Works every time.

- Krystine

Posted 07/05/09 06:27 PM

You can buy shirts online that are great for this problem - they say things like “Can I rub YOUR belly too?” and my personal favourite - “If you didn’t put this baby in here, then don’t even THINK about touching my stomach!” I wore that one while pregnant! There are also ones with “no touch” symbols and stuff on them. Great investment, in my opinion!!

- Anonymous

Posted 07/05/09 09:24 PM

Oh, lighten up, would ya? Maybe you should spit in the eye of the next person who touches you. Then run away, hysterically crying. That’ll show em!

- Shelly

Posted 07/05/09 11:18 PM

I agree with Shelly….Oh the horror! Someone is excited that you’re going to have a baby!

- calimommy

Posted 07/05/09 11:49 PM

I never understood the big deal with people rubbing a pregnant belly. It didn’t bother me one bit! Pregnancy is something that excites all humans, much like seeing a young child does! Have you ever had a niece or nephew or a little kid who when they walk by you just place your hand on their head for a moment?? It’s just draws people in! Lighten up a bit why don’t ya!

- RachelAZ

Posted 07/06/09 01:40 AM

I never really had a problem with people touching my belly but I did have a problem with perfect strangers touching my baby. I don’t know where their hands have been or if they are sick or what. This one lady one time did the sign of the cross on my baby’s forehead i nearly lost it ( we are not catholic) in this day and age people should have a little more common sense.

- Emma

Posted 07/06/09 09:42 AM

I also have not had a problem with people touching my belly, that’s because no one I know does it. The only one is the receptionist at my job and I’ve know her for years. I also don’t have strangers touching my kids either. In NYC, it’s a pretty much a “keep your hands to yourself” kind of town.

- Gigohead

Posted 07/06/09 10:36 AM

I agree with the writer. Just because you are pregnant does not give people the right to start touching you! Yes it’s exciting and No I don’t want to be touched by a stranger. It’s enough that being prego is alreayd doing a million different things to your body much less now you have to endure other people. Keep your hands to yourself, thank you!

- Anonymous

Posted 07/06/09 01:06 PM

never really had a problem with it. I was still in the military when I was prego and one of the female soldiers would rub my belly “for luck”. it worked for her and it actually made me glow to see them so excited for me. Besides, it’s not like they’re rubbing bare skin. If it really was a bother to me, I’d step back, give a bright smile and be on my way.

- aurhynn

Posted 07/13/09 07:49 PM

Wait until strangers start touching your baby! My husband and I came up with a great solution. Check it out Hands Off BAby!

- Cristie

Posted 09/11/09 08:40 AM

I think that it’s ironic that people complain about the lack of community and values and then complain when people try to be friendly. People touch you because you are bringing new life into this world and we have an instinct to cherish and delight in that. I think that pregnancy is one of the rare phases of life and community when someone feels that they can cross the threshold of reservedness and indiference, and just enjoy the happiness of someone else, and the innocence of the world. And I think that we, as mothers, would do well to remember that and to revel in it, as a reminder that there is still some good in this world that we are preparing to bring our child into.

- Aimee

Posted 10/19/09 11:46 AM

www.handsoffbaby.com has the cutest “Hands off Belly” maternity tops I’ve ever seen. They also have “wash hands before touching baby” signs, onesies and bibs, and hands off baby bibs & tees. The signs easily attach to strollers, infant carriers, etc.

- Marie

Posted 10/22/09 06:16 AM