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PiscesI'm Grounding My Husband
I'm 37 weeks pregnant, and my husband wanted to take a little road trip with his buddies. Ummm, buddy, I don't think so.
Mommy2B: Okay, so I know that, technically, it could be another (God help me) four weeks of pregnancy, but I really don't think that'll be the case. Therefore, there are some new rules I need to set in place for my husband this last month or so of pregnancy.
1. No more out-of-town trips. I don't need to explain why, right?
2. Going out for dinner with the boys? Limit your alcohol intake to a few drinks. What if I call you and I've gone into labor? I'll never forget having a drunk hubby as my labor coach.
3. Speaking of drinking, there will be no consumption of alcohol in the house. At this point in my pregnancy, I am at the end of my rope with the non-drinking, I'm moody, swollen, and feel like a tent. Watching you drink would be like torture.
4. If I send you a text message, I expect a response within ten minutes. If you don't get back to me right away, it's unacceptable. What happens if I've gone into labor and I text you?! You seem to have no problem getting back to work people, or friends, or your golf buddies.
5. Keep your phone on at all times. Yes, even in business meetings -- there's a setting called vibrate!
6. I have made a list of things for you to do. I think I have done enough over the past nine months -- you can do the rest: putting up the new curtains in the nursery, washing all the baby clothes, installing the car seat. You can get extra credit for a foot rub. I'll get ya back in about two months, when I'm in the mood again.
7. Family and friend visits are now restricted unless you get my permission. I definitely don't want a bunch of drunk buddies here, or family asking me why the nursery STILL isn't done!? Noooooo, thank you.
8. You have a 9 PM curfew, just like I do. Since I can't sleep when you're not here, you should be here at all times. The baby needs to rest.
9. No more swearing! The baby can hear you! Puhlease!
10. I found cigarettes in an old wine bottle on the porch! Used ones. Is it you? Don't tell me you are still occasionally indulging, because it means you lied. You said you'd quit for the baby!
What a long nine months it's been ...
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- 7 Comments
the guy should have common sense to do his part as a dad and husband. He’ll be very stupid if he’ll wait for his wife to tell him what should & shouldn’t do. Grow up, be responsible & be a MAN!
I hope this is joking…because if you have to force him to be home w/ you getting ready for his first baby then you are in serious trouble. you sound a bit like Kate Gosselin and look how great her marriage turned out. Be nicer and he’ll do what you want willingly.
Okay, Mommas - who here didn’t have at least one of these thoughts at least ONE time during the last month of pregnancy?
My hand isn’t raised. It wasn’t an all the time thing, but at least one of these thoughts popped into my head on one occassion, I’m sure of it!
I think the article’s pretty funny…its like she condensed the worse possible rants any woman has while nearly due and wound them into one set of rules :-)
She is 100% right!! Nothing she has listed is unacceptable -it’s actually all things he should be doing anyway.
I hope she is joking, this is the kind of “naggy” BS that pushes men AWAY!
If this isn’t enough to convince men not to get married, I don’t know what will do it. It was probably her idea to get pregnant in the first place; still, she has to make him pay for agreeing to it!
Dear lord. Glad I’m not married to her.