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Kate, Remove the Ring!

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Do it for your kids' sake, says a leading psychologist.

kate gosselin wedding ring today show

Dr. Michelle Golland: Yesterday on the "Today" show, Kate Gosselin tearfully said she hadn't removed her wedding ring because she didn't want to hurt the children. She said they see it as "Mommy and Daddy's love ring." In dealing with children and divorce, I think one of the things that is key to kids' mental well being is to be direct, honest, and give them clarity whenever possible.

It seems quite clear that Jon and Kate are not on any path to reconcilation. Jon has professed his love for Hailey Glassman. Kate is on a new journey of trying to be more adventurous and less controlling. They each have clearly embarked on new and separate lives.

I believe that Kate wearing the ring makes the relationship status confusing for the children. It may give them a false sense of hope that their mommy and daddy will get back together. Children will look for any sign, any signal that the world that has now crumbled around them will again be whole, back to what was normal for them, back to their parents living under one roof and in love.

The pain of false hope around a reconciliation can be more damaging as time goes on. It may also seem strange to the kids that Jon does not wear his ring, but Kate chooses to do so. The children may interpret from this that their father is a "bad" guy not wanting to reconcile, while Kate gets to look like the "good one" in their eyes. The children will be watching their parents very closely and, if not given the age-appropriate truth, they will create their own story -- which, unfortunately for kids of divorce, usually involves self-blame.

I say: Kate, it is time to remove the ring. For your kids' sake.

next: Top 10 Methods of Kid Discipline
10 comments so far | Post a comment now
Anonymous August 11, 2009, 11:24 AM

Maybe she should tell the kids the truth

MarMar August 11, 2009, 1:55 PM

My daughter was 3 when her father and I split up. I’m not saying there weren’t difficulties - she’s 6 now, and there still are. But she understood the truth, that Mommy and Daddy were going to be living in separate houses but would always love her, no matter what. The Gosselin children are all older than she was then, and they have one another for support. They can handle the truth too. And it won’t be easy, but you’re right, her still wearing the ring gives them a false sense of hope.

mb August 11, 2009, 2:06 PM

The kids are 5&8. She could wear a mood ring on that finger for all they know or care. Kate lies. That’s all you really need to know and remember about her. She lies through her fake veneered teeth.

reggie August 11, 2009, 2:28 PM

“Do it for your kids’ sake, says a leading psychologist.”

Yeah.. Let’s skip over the obvious multiple personality disorders and the fact that she does nothing for her children and focus on the stupid ring. Kate is nothing but a mixture of fiction and falsehoods.

She wears the ring because she wants to. Period. She thinks it makes her look more sympathetic when all it really does is make her look pathetic.

The woman needs a psych eval. Why aren’t you asking why that hasn’t happened?

JANE DOE August 11, 2009, 11:06 PM


TEAM JON !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

David Photog August 12, 2009, 1:06 AM

Kate doesn’t do things for her kids sake, if she did she wouldn’t put her divorce on TLC for the kids to later buy on DVD. She’s a loser and I feel sorry for the kids.

Kathy August 12, 2009, 1:31 AM

The ring thing is baffling to me. I’m sure you (collective you) are making it a bigger deal than it is. Divorce is hard, sometimes taking the ring off is too much for someone, much like someone that doesn’t want to get rid of the clothing after a family member dies. It’s her ring, her finger, her choice and really should be no concern of anyone elses.

Anonymous August 14, 2009, 10:49 PM

Jane Doe - just to set the record straight, here’s the clip of her being asked about the ring:

Anonymous August 28, 2009, 1:38 AM

Kate and Tlc lie. She still wears the ring because the big divorce finale hasn’t aired yet, but it has been no doubt taped already. she’s justing waiting for the show to air that’s been taped so in real life she can remove the ring. Reality tv my foot, it’s a lie and a show for support. None given here, because it will be on a show, that they want us (the stupid people) to think it just happened…

Peggy Gorman September 2, 2009, 5:45 AM

Kate and Octomom should become friends,birds of a feather flock together

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