Momlogic's Momstrosity: Check out a few ways to flush your money down the toilet.
10 Bizarre Potty Training Gadgets
Just Like Daddy: Toddler Urinal
Now little boys can pee just like Daddy does with their own plastic urinal that flushes just like the real thing. To truly mimic the men's room experience, set up 7 or 8 of them in a room, invite some of your kid's friends over, and make sure there's plenty of wet toilet paper all over the floor!
Potty Chair in Noah's Ark Theme
What genius came up with this idea? Do kids really hanker for a potty rocking chair with a biblical theme? Actually, they might be on to something -- potty training is similar to being rained on with urine for 40 days and 40 nights.
This cuddly talking monkey alerts kids when he needs to pee. First, he's nice about it: "I need to go potty. Let's go potty." But if kids ignore his pleas, he gets pissed. "Hey, take me to the potty now or I'll have an accident!" Your kid better listen up and get him to the potty pronto, or he just may start hurling his feces all over your nice clean walls.
It's a Party!! It's a Potty Party!!
Finally, a way to guarantee your kid's going to grow up to be a spoiled brat. Throw her a party as a reward for using the potty! That way, by the precedent you set, she will always think she deserves a party for such feats as brushing her teeth, tying her shoes, and later, for not getting knocked up.
Talking Toilet Paper
This product was solely inspired by mom-guilt. Busy moms without enough time to praise their toddler for going "pee pee on the potty" can record their voice and let a roll of toilet paper tell them instead. The company offers some sample messages:
I offer my own possible message:
Ready Aim Pee! Potty Targets
"They look like real targets so they can make potty training fun," says the product description. Kids take aim at what looks like a happy little drop of pee. Hopefully after mastering this, your little guy won't ask if he can have his own gun for some real target practice.
Big Mother is Watching: Potty Clock
A watch reminds your toddler to go potty in 30-, 60-, and 90-minute intervals. The product info on its website claims, "It takes care of the job of potty training for you!" Really? It mops up accidents and rinses out potty seats?
Piddlers Toilet Targets
More than anything, you gotta love the name of these toilet-training targets for boys. One problem: They look disturbingly similar to delicious candy.
The Tinkle Timer
Guess kids today won't tolerate a boring old egg timer, so Mom and Dad have to shell out cash to get a newfangled gizmo called a "Tinkle Timer." The timer tells kids exactly how long they need to sit on the potty. Not to be confused with a "time-out."
Potty Patty Riding Chair
Hey, when kids have an accident during potty training, just tell 'em to get back on the horse, or, um, whatever animal this weird potty ride is supposed to represent. Seems to me toilets shouldn't be easily confused with an amusement park ride.