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Thongs for My Tween?!

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Is it just me, or is tween underwear just way too sexy?

Thongs for My Tween?!
Meanest Mom Jana Mathews: I took my school-aged daughter shopping for underwear the other day. After visiting three tween clothing stores in the mall, I was left scratching my head or rather, covering my eyes.

When did girls' underwear leap out of its Fruit-of-the-Loom plastic packaging, grow zebra stripes, and become "panties"? A huge portion of the underwear marketed to tween girls these days is waaaaay too sexy.

Why in the world does a seven-, eight-, or nine-year-old need cheekies or a pair of low-cut underwear with the word "Trouble" stenciled across the backside? My first bra resembled a cut-off undershirt, a far cry from the hot pink padded numbers peddled by many tween retailers.

"These bras are really popular for first-timers," a sales rep told me as she pointed to an object that made me blush. "And they're totally gorgeous," she continued.

I practically pushed my daughter out of the store. Girls' underwear can be "fun" and even "cute."

One thing it should never be, however, is gorgeous.

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21 comments so far | Post a comment now
Kristin August 23, 2009, 3:55 PM

I noticed this too. My teenage sister has been wearing thongs for a few years now o_O *I* don’t even wear them!

Wendi August 23, 2009, 5:28 PM

Not in my house!! I have a 14 yr old and she is not allowed to wear the sexy stuff. There is no reason since no one will be looking…period. I think our little girls are being pushed into growing up to fast and looking sexy. It is not okay and our job as their mothers to just say no and get them what we think is appropriate to wear.

ame i. August 23, 2009, 5:55 PM

I had trouble finding uniforms for my younger daughter this year. All skirts/shorts/scorts/jumpers must be knee-length. She does have long legs, but even the “long” lengths were too short. I had to order from the uniform shop my older daughter’s private school insists we buy from.
I’m disturbed even by pants or shorts with a word on the behind. Sorry, I just don’t like the idea of someone “reading” a child’s butt.

Miranda August 23, 2009, 11:44 PM

I’m not a fan of the words on the butt pants, but I see nothing wrong with letting a teenager buy sexy underwear if she wants to. In high school I lived in jeans and a hoodie year round, but wore really pretty lingerie underneath it all, because it made me feel sexy. Wearing nice underwear doesn’t mean someone will be looking, as no boy (outside of family) saw mine until I was seventeen.

Bec Thomas August 24, 2009, 12:39 AM

Since when is a 7 or 8 year old a tween?

Brandie August 24, 2009, 2:14 AM

I don’t buy my 12 yr old padded bras or sexy panties, but I do buy her cute things that might have a bow or peace signs or monkeys (things she’s into right now) on them. I’ll even buy her panties that have words across her bum, depending on what it says. (she has one pair that says “here today mall tomorrow”).

Other than that if she wants something that’s too adult for her I just flat out tell her that for a 12 yr old that’s way to adult looking and that if she doesn’t like what I buy for her then when she gets a job of her own she can buy herself any type of bra and/or panties she wants to.

My husband doesn’t like that, but I’m just like if she’s 16 and buying herself a thong, I don’t care as long as nobody else is looking at it.

Annie August 24, 2009, 5:33 AM

Amen! I completely agree! It is an obvious push to encourage girls to be promiscuous from a young age and it is disgusting. I am 25 and do not have children and can not imagine raising them in the world today…but I praise the Lord there are still some senisble parents out there.

Kristin - August 24, 2009, 12:04 PM

I’m scared! My 9 y/o daughter is just starting to act all ‘tween-y’. Help!

Jessie August 24, 2009, 12:20 PM

I am currently pregnant with baby #1 (yay!) and I am so scared of when she has to get into the bras let alone when she gets to the age where there will no longer be ponies, flowers or hearts on her undies. I have a 10 year old sister who has not developed yet & she refuses to NOT wear a bra. My mother allows her to wear the pants with the “trouble” on the butt & it almost makes me cry. I think that all these girls who our tweens look up to now are also making it hard. If they see a Hannah Montanna thong then they’ll want it. Or a High School Musical padded bra, they’ll go crazy if you don’t buy it. I hate the way things are being sold to young girls today, brainwashing them and making these 10 years olds want to be that 16 year old girl on t.v. already kissing a boy.

Alice August 24, 2009, 1:13 PM

Hmmm. I don’t like the idea of young girls wearing “sexy” underwear - of course! - but I also don’t like the idea that mums give them the message that the underwear you choose is determined by whether or not someone is going to be looking at it. I’m sure most of us grown-up ladies choose underwear for *ourselves* and how we will feel while wearing it. How do we want our (collective) daughters to feel about their underwear? I’m sure there must be some good/acceptable answers to that, without insisting they feel *nothing*.

My two-year-old boy wears tiny boxer shorts. Naturally, he doesn’t feel “sexy”… doesn’t know the concept! He just enjoys being like Dad.

Jennifer August 24, 2009, 2:35 PM

Not only are the tween and teen panties cute panties that a women would even wear, but their bras are now lacy and very much padded. I try my best to find my girls the boy cute colorful panties. They do dress in the locker rooms with other girls, so I understand the fashionable under-roos want, but lets keep it covered and not be sexy, cute is fine.

teenmom August 25, 2009, 2:01 PM

I have an extremely athletic 15 year old daughter who spends hours a day in very short spandex shorts for her team practices. The choice there is a thong or nothing! I wasn’t thrilled and personally I’d like the spandex inseam to be a little longer!! Really, the underwear doesn’t make the girl - the parenting does. And kudos to the parents who say NO, you’re not old enough for that. I was one of them, and still am in many respects and my girls’ have turned out great!!

akumaxkami August 30, 2009, 2:59 AM

I’m with Alice on this.

It’s not as though anyone will be looking at your tween daughter’s underwear (hopefully).

Ally September 10, 2009, 9:41 PM

I totally think that tween girls should not be wearing thong underwear. I am not trying to say that thongs cause pregnancy, but the pregnancy rate is high enough as it is for this age group. We don’t need to encourage “sexiness” in young girls. It’s a fact that hot underwear gives women confidence….. it would be a shame for them to take their confidence to a cute boy in their class! :)

beaudacious September 12, 2009, 7:55 AM

Hello, I found this discussion very interesting. I have two girls who are 11 and 14. My oldest daughter wears a 36D(she’s not overweight - she takes after her father’s side of the family of beaudacious women). She is uncomfortable with the type of underwear available to young women her size. Her younger sister is disgusted by the underwear available to her - its boring, if its comfortable and uncomfortable if its sexy. I am personally into great underwear, sexy, lacy, sleek, whatever, but think that it is inappropriate for 10 -15 year olds to be wearing underwear that says “hot”, “foxy”, or “sexy” on it, or padded, or cut in suggestive ways. It is also giving girls the wrong message. Bras and panties are not for guys. They’re for women. I wear great underwear for myself. I buy nice underwear because I feel I look good in it. It is also comfortable, gives me the proper support, it lasts a good length of time and it doesn’t bunch up under my shirts or crawls up into the nether regions of my body. I want underwear that does these things for my girls. Largely what is out there for girls, is garbage. Wake up, underwear market!

13yearold ( ; March 25, 2010, 10:56 PM

I think this discussion is failing to see that girls are maturing faster, and becoming mentally older at a much quicker rate than adults give them credit for. We are treated like infants, and because of that, we want to be older and rebel more. So maybe think about that next time you want to have a chat with your daughter.
I like wearing nice underwear and bras that arent exactly “sexy” just because it makes me feel good and confident. My mom respects and trusts me and knows that if I feel good and if I’m happy, she’s happy.

amanda June 2, 2010, 1:04 PM

i dont understand the fuss - my mom LOVES to buy me sexy things ,but im not allowed to wear them on 14 and my mom takes me shoping alot - she loves to dress me up i think im her lifesize barbi -lol anyway its just me and my mom living here so yea she buys me panties and nightys all the time and i LOVE to wear them for her .

Fashion Design October 1, 2010, 4:47 AM

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Ten Tees January 9, 2011, 12:35 PM

Interesting info! Nice to read. There is a thing to offer about shirts.

Will. C. February 8, 2011, 6:48 PM

I am not a father personally, but I do have 4 young nieces, and I am like an uncle to many other young girls. I don’t understand the point of there being certain kinds of underwear for young girls. For those people that say, “Well it isn’t like there is going to be anyone looking at their underwear”. If that is the case, then why even bother in the first place. “Well it makes then feel . . Blah blah blah.” The only point of underwear is to feel comfortable, Period. There is no reason for a young girl to need to feel, OR LOOK “sexy”.

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