I took my daughter Kiana to her toddler group today. As we all sat down for the "mommy discussion" while the children played, the facilitator asked, "Any questions?"
Jennifer Ginsberg: Any questions? Let's see ...
When will I get my life back? My energy back? My passion back? My body back? Am I doing a good job? Why can't I get through a f*cking novel? Do I meet Winnicott's standards for the "Good Enough Mother"? Do my children love me? Will they one day sit on a therapist's couch and talk about what a narcissistic piece-of-sh*t mom I was? Are they content? Will they love each other when they are older? What will they remember about their childhood? How will they remember me? Will I ever sleep past 6 AM again?
Will my husband and I ever get to go to Greece alone? What am I going to be when I grow up? Did I make a mistake by giving up acting? Why are there cracks in my kitchen floor? Will I ever be able to complete the Sunday crossword puzzle? Should I try to kick my Starbucks addiction? When will Shane stop coming into my room at night? Should Kiana know her colors by now? Animal sounds? Am I a good-enough stepmother?
Should I be doing more? Doing less? Working more? Working less? Am I isolating? Hiding? From what? Am I the only one here that can't stand singing "Itsy Bitsy Spider"? Am I allowed any f*cking vices? Will I ever get past my grief over my mom's death? Should we just move to Hawaii? What do people really think of me?
Am I enough?
|Jennifer Ginsberg is a Los Angeles mother, writer, and addiction specialist with over 15 years of experience in the fields of alcoholism, addiction, and recovery. After receiving her MSW from the USC School Of Social Work and MAJCS from Hebrew Union College, Jennifer served as the clinical director of a 120 bed drug and alcohol treatment facility. She also co-developed an addiction prevention program for Jewish youth, which has been implemented in synagogues nationally. Jennifer now works privately with people who are impacted by the devastating effects of drugs and alcohol and writes about all topics related to motherhood, addiction, and women in politics. Read more about her life at angstmom.com|