I can't wait to take our son Luke out trick-or-treating. Sure, he won't know what the hell's going on, but I'll get to go home with a big bag of Snickers. The question is: what should a 6-month-old boy dress up as for Halloween?
1) R2-D2: This is my personal favorite. I may as well start imposing "Star Wars" on him at an early age. Not a coincidence that his name is Luke.
2 & 3) Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac: Topical, yes -- but will the government have to bail out our Halloween candy?
4) Whoopie Cushion: He already makes the same noises -- out of his mouth and his butt.
5) Pinetree Car Air Freshener: We saw this online, and it's really cute. And it might make him smell better, too.
6) Michael Phelps: Our baby has already set a world record for freestyle puking.
7) Bag of Cash: Another item we saw online. This also represents how much the baby will cost us.
8) Hobo: I only put this politically incorrect idea on the list because I think I dressed as a hobo when I was 6. I had a stick with a bandanna tied around it and everything. How horrible!
9) Tom Cruise: Baby and Tom are roughly the same height. "You had me at Enfamil."
10) Baby Elvis: There's Skinny Elvis ... Fat Elvis ... why not baby Elvis? What's cuter/creepier than a toddler with sideburns?
11) Political pundit Chris Matthews: Luke drools about as much as he does.
12) Xbox 360: This way, something I love will dress as something else I love.
|Paul Starke is an Emmy-winning TV producer, and a co-writer of the #1 New York Times bestseller, An Inconvenient Book.|