What would your paparazzi shots look like?

Lenore Moritz: I can't get a photo of myself that I find acceptable -- and it's not for lack of trying. For days, I've had my husband try to get just one (I need it for a certain purpose). We've tried both black and white and color, "going out" hair and "just woke up" hair, looking at the camera, looking away, with kids and without. It has all yielded exactly nothing.

All that futile fussing made me think about celebrities and how they're caught by photographers "being one of us." Can you imagine having a surprise snapshot of your life taken at the playground, at the market, leaving the gym?! I'm certain there are reams of great things about being famous, but being photographed unexpectedly cannot be one of them.

If my life were caught in snapshots at random moments, it might go a little something like this:

The "I hope no one is looking" shot:
In this one, my eyes are shifted to the left as I take a subtle glance around to see who's watching as I let my son eat his corn on the cob -- which has just dropped on the street ... it had just rained, though. Click.

The action shot:
After I turned my back on the playground for 20 seconds to help my 1-year-old, I become a blur as I tear across the playground to fetch my 3-year-old, who decided it would be fun to follow a pack of 6-year-olds who wanted to play near the traffic. Click.

The horror shot -- this one requires two frames:
I'm putting away groceries as my 18-month-old waddles toward me holding what appears to be chocolate. "Adorable," I think -- this first photo is me all smiley and proud. Abruptly, my smile turns to jaw-on-the-floor and my eyes open wide as I realize that my 1-year-old has no secret stash of chocolate -- and this is POOP! Click.

Maybe you've been there, too. These may not be the pictures of a family album, though they do make for funny memories (or at least the catalyst to a first conversation about "stranger danger").

In the meantime, it's back to the camera for me. Will I ever find a photo that seems right? If every picture tells a story, I haven't found one yet to take me past "The ..." But I'm hopeful that the right smile, attitude, and hair will all align at some point (yikes, it all seems eerily like choosing a yearbook picture!).

Lenore Moritz is the curator/editor of Mom Culture, a culture fix for your inner grown up. Each Friday, a new artist interview and their art will inspire and energize you. High culture, pop culture and everything in between is covered.