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Does Quinn Gray Have Stockholm Syndrome?

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Our expert gives her opinion on Quinn Gray's mental state.

Quinn Gray

Dr. Michelle Golland: The wealthy Florida woman Quinn Gray, who stands accused of faking her kidnapping and extorting money from her husband, may have been suffering from Stockholm Syndrome (the psychological bonding that can occur between captive and abuser), which was complicated by bipolar disorder. After listening to the tapes and watching her husband Reid struggling to understand this complicated and devastating incident, I am not convinced that she did any of this willingly.

Given the family history of Quinn Gray, it does appear that she has been suffering from undiagnosed bipolar disorder and was self-medicating for most of her adult life with alcohol. Reid Gray should be commended for not rushing to judgment and vilifying his wife of 15 years. I can see his deep desire to have grace and dignity during this time for his children, himself, and his wife. He is candid about their struggles in their marriage, and seems to truly love his wife and want to help her heal and recover from her bipolar disorder.

There are a few things that make me believe Quinn may have been kidnapped, was simply trying to survive this traumatic event, and may have quickly developed Stockholm Syndrome coupled with a severe manic phase of bipolar disorder. I question why she would have actually given the correct name of her alleged abductor, Jasmine, a correct description of his car, and directed them to the location where she had been held. It seems counterintuitive for someone who had faked her kidnapping and colluded with the kidnapper to reveal those truths at the risk of being caught.

I am not surprised by her own confusion of events and what she reports because of her possible manic episode. Quinn Gray, if kidnapped, must have feared for her life -- which she does tell the police in her interview. She didn't know if she would survive this kidnapping. Stockholm Syndrome does not need days or weeks to occur, it can be set off the moment we are in extreme fear of bodily harm.

Stockholm Syndrome is a survival strategy, which is triggered in extreme conditions such as:

• The constant threat to physical and psychological survival
• A condition of helplessness and hopelessness
• Isolation and loss of support systems from the outside world
• A context of trauma and terror that shatters previously held assumptions
• The perception that survival depends on total surrender and compliance.

I am not convinced that Quinn Gray plotted this kidnapping with the evidence that I have seen. We must consider that this may have been a desperate wife and mother trying to survive an extreme set of circumstances. If she was in a manic state, this would have made the situation all that more challenging and confusing for her to manage.

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14 comments so far | Post a comment now
Heather E. Sedlock November 16, 2009, 8:53 AM

Amen. I’m glad someone can see through this mess and weigh in with an informed opinion. With so many tragic women figures in the news lately, it’s easy to believe the worst of somebody. As for myself, I have lived with and loved many people with bipolar disorder and can easily see how this could be a true event confounded by the bipolar and possible Stockholm Syndrome. In fact, that was my guess from the beginning of this news story. Thanks for posting this insighful article!

Julie November 16, 2009, 12:19 PM

People with Stockholm Syndrome do not plot their kidnapping. She gave the correct name of Osmanovic because presumably she was setting him up to take the fall all along. I believe she had a relationship with Osmanovic for 1-1/2 months prior to her plot to be kidnapped in order to get him to go along with this ridiculous idea to get money and changed her story several times which is not consistent with Stockholm Syndrome. She also was completely alone at the hotel without Osmanovic during part of the weekend she was “kidnapped” including one full night when she could have left at any time. She may have gotten away with her plot if Osmanovic had not recorded their conversations/sexual proclivities to protect himself.

Amanda November 16, 2009, 12:54 PM

I don;t think that’s entirely true. There have been stories in the media long ago about children who were kidnapped and left alone where they too could walk out at any time, however, they were so frightened for themselves and bcs of anticipated threats to their families that they stayed and didn’t think to leave. There is no reason an adult could not have felt that way also. I suggest that only as devil’s advocate as I am not completley familiar with the story, and just want to offer another view before ppl make their minds up.

Katie November 16, 2009, 5:49 PM

I wish I could agree with you Michelle. I want to believe she was not out to swindle her husband. But I really think she set this up. Both she and her husband had been unfaithful in the past and I think she was trying to find a way to be with her new lover.

Dan November 18, 2009, 3:48 AM

Yea, right it has to be the Stockholm Syndrome! Nobody has to take responsibility for their actions anymore, just blame it on someone or something else!! And she’s been in a Mental Hospital for how long????!!!! Going through therapy for a mental illness??? Keep drinking that Kool-Aid lady…..

Anonymous November 18, 2009, 6:52 PM

Thank you so much Michelle! Quinn did not know Osmanovic. She was not in town when he said they met. I know my sister and she would never have gone with Osmanovic willingly. He stalked, robbed, kidnapped and sexually assaulted Quinn. Quinn had her own money and Reid made all of their money during the marriage. Quinn would not extort money from herself. She was kidnapped and anything that happened after that is a result of that kidnapping. Quinn had no motive. She was planning a birthday party for her daughter that Sunday. Osmanovic is broke and he has motive and planned this with his live in girlfriend Cali Bowers. Bowers turned that “tape” in to police and tape is not valid and may have been doctored and was certainly turned on at Osmanovic’s will. My first thought was Quinn was suffering from “Stockholm syndrome” that is the only thing that makes sense. This is very out of character for her. She is the sweetest, gentlest person you will ever meet. The rest is media crap! Thank you for seeing this common syndrome. Look at several cases of kidnapping just recently and “Stockholm syndrome” was involved in all of these cases.

Anonymous November 18, 2009, 7:03 PM

Osmanovic’s affidavit has been released by the press as fact. The word of a criminal! The media has taken bits and pieces out of context to distort the truth. The sheriff planted the seed by saying this was not a kidnapping when in fact it was. Osmanovic made that audio tape after she had been held for four days. Unless you have walked in Quinn’s shoes you have no idea how you would react. I have 5 sisters and have been a nurse for 20 years. I have seen 1000’s of date rape and rape cases where the victim goes along with it just so they can get it over with and get out of that situation. Millions of women are raped everyday and do not resist for a multitude of reasons, mostly because they knew it was about to or going to happen and they were afraid of any further violence for themselves or family.

forex robot November 18, 2009, 10:48 PM

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sandy November 25, 2009, 2:29 PM

Can someone seriously get stockholm syndrome in just a day or two? Plus, it would have been Jasmin that would get it since SHE was the one running the whole show. Has she been diagnosed on paper to be bipolar?? This man left her alone with the car keys and she didn’t escape? Also in her interview the cops ask her what her state of mind was when she was with him intimately and she replies, not that she was scared but that she was going to have a lot of sex. Kidnapped victims usually get raped not “have sex”. She has issues, not a disease.

Anonymous November 28, 2009, 3:43 PM

Osmanovic is the one who directed everything, Quinn just went along with it by saying…yeah, yeah, yeah. Even the tapes show that Osmanovic is in charge. He had her convinced that her husband wouldn’t pay the ransom because he wanted he killed..who knows what happened in the days preceeding that tape. Osmanovic made a deal with the police, Anyway what is wrong with the public, press, and the sheriff??? Those tapes prove that Osmanovic did not know Quinn prior to taking her from the house, and many other statements he made prove his quilt! Please, if you are not a kidnap victim you have no idea what you would do to ensure your safety. The guy admitted it was his gun. Admitted that he took her and promised she would see her kids again. He effectively made Quinn think that he was sent by his boss to collect money and that Quinn should be grateful that he liked her and didn’t send someone else to take care of it. Nancy Grace played the tapes and they only showed clearly that Osmanovic stalked, robbed, and sexually assaulted Quinn while he was trying to extort money from her and family. Quinn has her own money, she didn’t need to extort money from herself, she was going along with this animal. I have known Quinn for 37 years and she would never have gone with Osmanovic willingly. Once that did happen though, she is smart enough to have kept herself alive. Most of the media, fans of the tabloids, and the ignorant sheriff would have only been kind to Quinn had she been killed. Stockholm Syndrome absolutely! Every case of kidnapping in the recent news and old cases like Duggard, Smart, Holbeck, and the poor little girl seen going into the elevator with her killer. You didn’t see her screaming and crying, because she quickly developed Stockholm syndrome as she had to trust him for her survival. Unfortunately she was raped and murdered. I thank God that Quinn is safe although extremely despondent.

anony December 1, 2009, 12:11 PM

Ok, I am sorry to Quinn’s sister, but Quinn is a tramp. She and her husband BOTH slept with other people and she even bought Jasmin a phone cause she didnt want her husband to find out..and what about when she got caught, “and how will you be paying for your bail Mrs. Gray,” response,”I dont know” what happened to that bank account you can just “take 50,000 $$ out of). She is a horrible excuse for a wife and mother and shouldn’t be allowed to be involved in her kids lives for a LOOOOONNNNGGG time. Unless we want her girls growing up and just using men like she did. Osmanovic was a business owner who did very well, she was a sad pathetic drunk housewife who messed everyones lives up it seems. I feel bad for the husband even though he is a cheat, and for Osmanovics “friend” who is getting her name dragged through the mud even though she has nothing to do with this.I wonder how long Quinn had been plotting this, what a piece of trash.

brianna December 1, 2009, 3:53 PM

this woman is bonkers

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