Michelle Kemper Brownlow: I was completely disturbed.
So, as I sat wishing I was watching "Ellen," I contemplated life through the eyes of a child. It's a warped place.
This kid, Caillou, is a whiny, annoying 4-year-old. To my dismay, I actually saw my son making mental notes. "Whine, pout, run to room. Mom brings cookies. Talk about whining and pouting. Cookies!" Can there be an episode where the mom freaks out and throws a tantrum when Caillou fills the toilet with scrambled eggs? Can she please run out of cookies and milk? Can she have the Mother Hubbard snack options I have? Here, honey, let's talk over a sliced onion and cinnamon?
And where is his hair? He's FOUR!
Then we watched "Max & Ruby." Why has children's services not been called? They are preschoolers and their parents are never home. They roam the streets, play in the tub, and feed themselves. I had to take my anxiety meds before it was over.
I don't know about you, but "Dora the Explorer" is just a little bit too chipper for me. And, Good Lord, get the girl a notepad ... she repeats everything 40,000 times throughout the show. I got up to vacuum to drown out her "purple mountain, bridge, Grandma's house" repetitive Hell.
Then ... came the show that broke this camel's back. As an artist, I love the bright colors and bold imagery of "Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Kids," but spiders? As friends? Really? If my son brings me one more REAL spider thinking she is his "friend," I am canceling my cable!
Whining street children who repeat every direction they are given and play with spiders. This is our future? Help!
|Michelle Kemper Brownlow is a freelance parenting writer, artist and popular mommy blogger who holds nothing back at My Semblance of Sanity. Michelle's unique but gentle parenting insight paired with her quirky sense of humor works to her benefit as she writes and illustrates children's picture books.|